


In love with the redneck

by Cozzy92



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Awkward Romance, Death, F/M, I'll try my best, My First Fanfic, Platonic Relationships, Romantic Soulmates, Sex, Smut, Unlikely Family, Unrequited Love, Walkers, im not very good with tags
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-27
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2018-12-20 15:15:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 25
Words: 69,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11923599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cozzy92/pseuds/Cozzy92
Summary: Lucy has had it hard since the world ended and thought she would forever be alone. That was untill a group came to the community and they welcomed her into their unconventional family. Things were going good but it never stays like that for long in a world where the dead have risen.





	1. The first meeting

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fan fic so I'm sorry if it seems all over the place.

It has been six weeks since I got found by Aaron and brought back to Alexandria. Six weeks and nothing here has changed like the world never changed at all behind these walls. Six weeks of not being able to leave because the woman in charge thinks I’m insane and won’t be able to go on runs. I’m just a weak little English girl who was out there on her own for too long, she sees what she wants not what I am. Six weeks of just stock taking and telling them what is needed. Six weeks of complete boredom.  
Every time I told Deana that they weren’t safe she always says “the walls are strong we are safe here”. Like fuck are we. There has been no-one on look out since I got here and I don’t think there has ever been. Most of them are oblivious to what has happened, they have been ‘safe' behind these walls since the start and have no idea of what is going on. The dead rose and they just hid and built walls to stop the dead getting in and ignored everything going on.  
I’m not allowed outside of the walls, I have no ‘job' just whatever Deana says for me to do that day. I am bored and restless, that is what is making me insane not what happened before they found me.  
Aaron found me up a tree about ready to shoot him cause I thought he might of been there to hurt me. It took him an hour of talking and showing me pictures, food they make and about the things and people I would find in their safe community before I would even say one word to him and stop aiming at him. If I had thought he was there to hurt me I would of shot him on sight but there was something about how clean he was, too clean to have been out here all along.  
Once I had come down from my tree he introduced me to his boyfriend Eric, a skinny guy who looked scared. He was only out there because of Aaron you could tell by the way he stood behind him not really saying anything.  
They drove me back to their community and it only took about 20 minutes , I would of found it myself even if they hadn’t found me. I was taken to the ‘leader' and she interviewed me on camera and allocated me a house. She told me I would have this huge three bed two bath house to myself until a family or huge group was found.  
The first thing I did was run to the bathroom to shower. It had been about a year since I had even felt hot water on my skin that I didn’t have to boil myself. I felt like I was in heaven and none of the past two hellish years had happened.  
I washed my green fading hair that had almost grown out now. I never had the time to cut it, it was the only thing that remained of the person I used to be before the shit hit the fan and lost everyone I loved and cared about.  
With tiredness I claimed a room that I was determined would stay mine no matter what and fell into a deep deep sleep for the first time in months.  
Nothing has changed since I got here. Everyone was content to stay here behind the walls. Everyone but me.  
I was walking through the streets when a group turned up looking tired, dirty and weary. I knew just by looking at them things were going to change. They had been out there from the start and knew that everyone here was living in a dream land. The man in front the leader was holding a baby around 7 months old by my guessing , right next to him was a teenage boy with a sheriffs hat on. A couple of women, one of which had dreads and a sword. A ginger guy who looked ready to attack if things went wrong and an Asian guy stood as close to one of the women in a defensive manner. The last person was the one I was more interested with. He looked like he didn’t belong but did at the same time. With his face like thunder, long shaggy brown hair in his eyes and crossbow over his muscular shoulder. I knew instantly that I would want to know him in either world we lived in. Deana came over and defused an issue they were having about the guns. She refused to let anyone carry them even though people would be safer if they did have them in my opinion.  
Once the interviews had finished they were all brought over what Aaron thought were the last two empty houses they had left. How wrong he was, one of them was mine and I was not moving. Some of them came a checked my house out while I wasn’t there but left for the night to go sleep in the other for the night and stay together obviously to figure things out and who would be going where.  
I was just getting out of the shower when someone stormed in , I hadn’t even had enough time to get my towel when they charged through the door. I stood defensively with my knife while he had his crossbow aimed at me each of us waiting for the other to so something.  
“Is there a reason you are in my house about to shoot me” I ask as I lower my knife “also can you pass me that towel please”. That was when he noticed I was naked and averted his eyes to the towel I was asking for all the while turning redder than I thought a person could become.  
“We were told that this is one of our houses, I was out keeping watch and saw the lights on” he says in a sexy southern accent while passing me the towel over so I can cover up. “didn’t know this was already ya place”  
“Its fine I’m sure I can share, there are two other rooms” I wait for what seems like 5 minutes for a reply.  
“I’ll talk with Rick about that we ain’t that trusting of outsiders if ya get me” he finally said while looking in my eyes searching my soul for anything incriminating.  
“The first step to trust is knowing names, I’m Lucy and you are?” I have never had to get someone to trust me before they just do I’m always the more weary of people. Or so I thought before meeting this guy, what had happened to him for this level of mistrust. After a few seconds he turned to leave and while walking out he said “names Daryl I’ll let ya get back to your evening, night”  
“goodnight Daryl” I shouted out hoping he would hear me as I heard the front door close. I changed and got into bed my heart still pounding after seeing him up close. After I had calmed down I had my first dream in what felt like years, of blue eyes and strong arms running up and down my body pulling me closer to him. I went willingly searching for the warmth they would bring but never getting it. I woke up before the sun and started my day wondering why after one small interaction with this man was he all I could thinking about. It was the first day since I had been here that I didn’t mind everyone here and their little dream world, I wasn’t bored and I was determined to start changing things here in the hope that this new group were likeminded people.


	2. Getting to know her

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl feels I'm comfortable here, maybe Lucy can give him more reason to stay.

Daryl's pov.

Who was that girl, ready for anything. She was naked and still had a knife with her. What did she think was going to happen behind these safe walls. I saw her walking around before I had that ‘interview' with their leader, she seemed to be as oblivious as everyone else here. How can they just ignore what is going on in the world. The dead have risen, oh never mind let’s have a fucking tea party.   
These people don’t know the first thing about surviving but she is different. A knife in the shower, if she thought she was safe then she wouldn’t do that. I had decided as soon as I came inside of these gates that I wanted to spend as less time in here as possible. But now I’m not too sure. I want to know this, what did she say her name was, Lucy?   
I’m walking back and I see Rick on the porch watching me as I’m stood outside of the other house looking confused as to why I’m here. I start moving towards him, “lights were on, someone lives there”  
“ Deana and Aaron said these two were the last empty houses and for us” he mumbled back. What does he want me to do kick her out of the house she has been given. We just got here and he must know I never wanted to come here, I’m only here for him and little asskicker. I would do anything for that kid, anything.   
I felt the same way about Lucy as soon as I barged into her bathroom thinking she was an intruder. This deep need to protect her from anything even myself. “You should get some sleep brother, long day tomorrow, look of this place we need to see if it really is safe and how we can make it safe”. Rick said pulling me from my thoughts. I must of drifted off into my head more than I thought I had cause I was just stood still again. Why is it that I think of her and everything drifts off. I head inside to lay down in one of the free corners and look over everyone just in case something were to happen I would be ready.  
I lay there thinking of Lucy and our little encounter. Her skin looked like porcelain, her hair complimenting her eyes. I can see how she would of looked in the old world dyed hair with dark makeup to go with it. She doesn’t look like the type to wear pretty dressy with flowers on everything she owned. Not that I would know what she wears as she was as naked as a person could be. God her body, curvy in all the right places, big perky tits with and arse that any woman would die for. Her accent was something I didn’t expect, an English girl in America when the world ended, sounds like a stupid chic flick to me. But here she was in a country that wasn’t hers.  
I haven’t had the time to settle down with anyone after the world went to shit, eating and shelter were more important. But now, here, maybe I could see myself with her. She would be my dream woman in any world we lived in. I have to know her, it's like a need not a want . As I drift off I continue to think of her, thinking of ways I could be near her at all times in case I’m needed for anything. 

The next day I wake up before everyone else and see that Rick decided it was safe enough for no-one to be on watch as he’s 2 feet away from me. I get up and go outside as to not wake anyone up and see I’m not the only one up. She is on her porch with a mug looking out at all the houses just like I was last night. Keeping watch for danger.   
“Good morning Daryl, going to be a nice day” there was that accent again, it almost makes me weak in there knees.   
“Mornin” I say as I nod my head her way. With that she moved into the house and took her stuff with her. I heard everyone waking up and moved to go back in to see what we were all doing today.   
“ Morning Daryl, did you sleep okay” Carol asks me while moving to the kitchen for water for everyone. “I slept fine. what we doing” I ask Rick.   
“Some of us have been giving jobs already so They will do those while keeping watch. Maggie has a job right next to Deana so maybe we can make some changes to things around here. Carol is going to get to know the people here. Everyone else just watch for anything, we need this place safe for all of us. We can’t be out on the road anymore it’s not a life for any of us”. He says it like it’s a bad thing, being out there at lest I feel alive, in here I feel smothered.  
“I’m gonna go out and check around the place see what’s out there” I tell Rick. I’m not staying here more that I have too. They can make sure the inside is safe and I’ll go out there and do the same. Maybe catch some food while I’m at it.   
I head to the gate and see Lucy arguing with Deana. “I want to go out, I didn’t know coming here meant I was on bloody house arrest. I need to get out and do something.” She really is going for it, how long has she been here doesn’t sound like long if they are forcing her to stay.  
“ You need to stay here for your own safety, you haven’t been here long and you haven’t yet settled in”  
“Not settled in, you have got to be kidding me. I have felt suffocated in here for six weeks I need to be in the open. You want me to be more settled then let me hunt” she waves her bow in front of Deana’s face to prove that’s all she wants to do. “Let me provide something to the community and not be stuck in here waiting for you to think of something I can do. I can hunt and get food. Why won’t you let me?”  
“I’ll go with her if ya want” I butt in and they both look at me only just realising I’m here.   
“That’s not a good idea Mr Dixon, I don’t want unnecessary people going out on supply runs when we have people for that already.”   
“This ain’t a run it’s a hunt. Need fresh food too. And like Lucy here I need to provide something” I say, she is not keeping me behind these walls. I will find a way out if I have to.   
“Fine but stick together and don’t go far” she gave in. Thank fuck for that I don’t want to be sneaking around. We move to the gate and grab a hand gun each just in case of a pack of walkers.  
“Thank you Daryl, I owe you one. They haven’t let me leave since I got here and I’m going stir crazy.” She turns to me as we walk out of the gates and her whole body relaxes. Surely it should be the other way round, relaxed behind the walls. “Hey if we get anything I'll cook you dinner tonight, how about it?”   
“You don’t owe me anythin.” She doesn’t want to owe anything to anyone , that’s the only reason she asking. Don’t get too carries away and think she likes you too.   
“No I want to get to know you better. When you guys showed up yesterday I knew just by looking at you things would change in there and look they already have, I’m outside for the first time in ages.” She’s smiling at me like I just gave her the best present ever. I guess I did if she’s been cooped up inside. Her smile gave me butterfly in my stomach and I couldn’t help but return one back.  
“Fine, ya better be good with rabbit cause I see a trail”. We move silently through the woods that surround Alexandria, not going too far out, hunting for any prey that we see. The last time I had a hunting partner like this was with Merle. He wouldn’t of liked it in there either. Too stuck up their own arses he would of said. 

When it was just after noon we made a move back with our haul, she did pretty good with that bow of hers, seven rabbits and two possums. I did about the same. As we get closer I watch her start tensing up again. I would love to be the one to get her to relax. Take her to bed and not leave until we are both spent. Oh the things I would do the her, as I watch her arse moving as she walks I can’t help but get hard at the thought of her being naked and bouncing on top of me.   
“Daryl are you ok?” she says while looking at me weirdly. Did I stop to think again, fuck I’m getting hot.   
“yeah fine, let’s get back” I say while rubbing my neck hoping she’s doesn’t see how red I have become. Why do I keep stopping what I’m doing to think about her. It could get me killed out here.   
“Okay if your sure, don’t forget dinner at my place. Be there at seven. Oh and if some of you are moving in tell them to come after dinner okay” she must trust us to want us under her roof. What I wouldn’t give to be in her bed all night making her scream my name as I do things to make her cum over and over again. I need to stop thinking about her like that I already need a cold shower.   
We get back and give the guns to a woman called Olivia and most of the game except two of the rabbits which Lucy kept a hold of. After we were done we walked back to the houses in a comfortable silence and she waved as she moved into her house. Running up the stairs for a shower, stripping off and getting in I turn it down so it’s freezing but I can’t help but think of her. The one time a cold fucking shower don’t work. I grab a hold of myself and start off slow as I fantasize about striping her of her clothes and seeing her white blemish free skin, wanting to mark it myself and lay claim to her making her mine. Reaching down and teasing her entrance with my fingers feeling that she is wet and ready for me. Lifting her up and pushing her up againced the bathroom wall I slipping into her tight pussy lowly and start to move hearing her little moans of pleasure. As she starts to quicken around me I pound into her as she cries out my name.   
Once I had finished I continued with my shower, getting out I heard that everyone is back. Getting dressed as quick as I can I go down to see what’s happening.   
Michonne sees me first “Why so fancy Daryl got a hot date we don’t know about”. Shit did I make noise while I was relieving myself, don’t think I did. Plus is what I’m wearing really look much different to what I usually were. All that’s different is I’m wearing my only sleeved pled shirt.  
“got invited next door for dinner during my hunt” I flush slightly as u say it, everyone looks at me strangely for a second then Rick spoke up with what was going to happen for the night.   
“Deana said some of us can move in next door if we still want to or we can have the house across the road. I vote for both as the girl next door seems to have her head on straight and knows this place ain’t as safe as Deana thinks. Daryl as you have met her I want you in there with her and keep an eye on her, I’m not sure if we can trust her just yet. The rest of you that don’t want to be in this house move over the road. I’m going to go for a walk and check the place over again with the kids and try and get to know some of them.” Rick is in full leader mode. Did he just say I’m moving in with Lucy, after what just happened upstairs this is going to be hell for me. I don’t know if I can contain myself while under the same roof, its hard enough with her just next-door.   
Rick left after that with Carl and Judith, getting my bag I quickly make sure I have everything. Going over I can smell the food already and it’s mouth watering. I knock on the door expecting for her to take a while but it open straight away and she’s beautiful in a little black dress and bare feet. Her long legs moving her into the house and I watch her arse move side to side I’m a mesmerising manner.  
“Come in roomie. Go put your stuff upstairs in one of the rooms and dinner will be done in a minute”. How did she know I was moving in, did she hear us. Of course not your holding a fucking bag you idiot. Upstairs I pick a door but end up in her room and it smells like vanilla, just like her. Just being here and smelling her reminds me of how beautiful she is and how me being here is a bad idea. Taking a final sniff I move to a different room and set my stuff on the bed before going back downstairs.  
This is going to a very long and interesting night seeing if I can trust her as much as she seems to trust me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel that this chapter was a bit better. I know where I want this to go it's just getting there. Thank you for the kudos and all those hits.   
> Till next time :)


	3. Out again?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl searches for something Lucy wants.

Lucy’s pov 

I was waiting by the door for him hoping I wasn’t too dressed up. I wanted this to go well. After he managed to get Deana to let me outside the walls I wanted to kiss him right there and then, but I didn’t know how he would of reacted to a stranger kissing him. I invited him to dinner cause I really want to know him even if he wasn’t in my life intimately I still wanted him around. It’s strange I have never felt this need for someone ever. Just the thought of him has me tingling all over and smiling from ear to ear. Our hunting trip gave me a chance to stare at him, the way his muscles moved as he tracked the rabbits through the woods. Every time he would look up to check were the sun was making sure we didn’t get back late I wanted to run kisses along his jaw and down his neck while running my hands through his hair.   
He knocked at the door pulling me from my little fantasy and with a smile I opened it making him jump slightly. I saw the bag and was relived that he was the one moving in, it meant I could have my way with him if I so wished. “ Come in roomie. Go put your stuff upstairs in one of the rooms and dinner will be done in a minute”. After looking at me like I have 3 heads he came in and up the stairs. What was that about, did I say something wrong. Going to checking that dinner was done I starting to serve it between the two plate my mind drifted off again thinking of living under the same roof as a beautifully sexy man that I would let do anything he wanted with me.   
Once again pulled from my thoughts he tapped me on the shoulder “Smells amazin. What we havin” he was so close that I could of stood on my toes and kissed him, he smelt amazing like soap and of the woods.   
“Rabbit stew and potatoes, I don’t have much to work with so I hope you like it” I’m nervous with him standing so close I could touch him if I wanted. He needs to trust me more before I can start do anything like that. “Would you like to eat at the table or in the kitchen?”   
“Here will do if ya want” he shrugs as he says it. I’m getting the feeling that he’s been forced to be here, ignoring it I place the plates down in front of the bar stools. Walking round to take a seat he follows me.  
“Where have you all come from” I say just wanting to make some conversation, the scraping of cutlery the only noise other than the occasional moan of appreciation to the food. The moaning he was doing was going straight to inbetween my thighs.  
“Georgia what about yaself” he replies after finishing his mouth full “This is fuckin amazin, where’d ya learn to cook like this”   
“Well here, but my parents sent me to England when I was 4 to live with my auntie and I just stayed there till about 3 years ago and I came back. What a time to come back” I blush remembering his comment. “I could cook before but never on a camp fire. I’m happy to have a oven again but this tastes better over a fire. I’ll have to make it another time for you. If you would like?”  
“Yeah I’d love that” he replied with a smile. The way his face lit up made me tingle all over again. I pushed my thighs together as a reminder to not get carried away and not start something until I know he wants it too. 

After dinner I clean up after telling him to sit down again refusing to let him help. “Seems unfair somehow, ya cooked I’ll clean” he says while sighing. “I’ve got it. For tonight your a guest. Tell you what you can cook tomorrow.”   
He moves round the counter passing me his plate slightly frowning. “Don’t know how I’ll follow that”   
“I’m sure you’ll come up with something. I’m going to head up now it’s getting a bit late. Goodnight Daryl and I’m glad your staying here with me. Makes me feel a bit safer knowing there are people here that know how to survive.” I say while smiling up at him and I hear the quick intake of breath as I touch his arm moving it quickly away and go up stairs. I didn’t mean to touch him but I couldn’t resist any longer. He was stood so close I was starting to get overwhelmed with his scent. Going to the bathroom to shower again I turned the water on and climb in enjoying the water flowing over my body wishing it was Daryl’s hands. Once clean I grabbed my towel and cursed myself for forgetting my clothes. Opening the door I peaked around the door to see if he was there. The coast was clear, I started running quickly to my room but smacked right into Daryl as he reached the top of the stairs. He started blushing as I realised my towel had slipped to my waist and my top half was on full show. I covered myself with my arms and moved round him wishing him goodnight again. Closing the door behind me I got into my bed shorts and tank top and climbed into bed.   
The look on his face and the sizeable tent in his trousers making me blush. I wanted to touch him and make him feel better than he had since the turn, if ever. I touch myself in all the places I want him to be and imagine bringing him to my room and sorting out his problem for him, kissing his neck and moving down his body as I undo the buttons on his shirt. Getting to his trousers pulling them down until he is fully exposed and taking him in my hand moving slowly before replacing my mouth with my hand. Looking up at him while I watch him lose control and moans my name. As he gets closer his hands move to my hair as a warning but I don’t let up and keep going. This is when I climax, pulling my hands from my shorts I lick my fingers and roll over hoping my fantasy doesn’t stay just that. 

The next morning I wake up to the smell of cooking toast. Moving down stairs slowly just in case someone other that Daryl was here I head to the kitchen. His back is turned to me making coffee and toast for himself . Not knowing I was there I reach round him for a cup to make some tea.  
“Mornin, sorry if I woke ya” he says while looking me up and down “ ya wanna come back out with me again. Need to check the back of the wall today.”   
“Yes please I’d love that. My knight in shining armour saving me from a dull existence of counting cans” smiling up at him. He smiles back. “ I’ll be ready in five just got to get some outside clothes on” I say while gesturing to myself giving him permission to look. He does after a second and blushes as he sees how little I am wearing. While he is distracted I pinch the piece of toast in his hand and smile at him before I run up the stairs to get ready. 

Daryl’s pov

This girl is going to be the death of me first she touches my arm last night and I feel as if she burned me where she touched. Then she runs into me in the hall half naked her perky tits bouncing from the impact. To say I didn’t think about her all night would be a lie. Now she is wearing hardly anything and stealing my food. As she runs away I can’t help but look at her arse again only just hanging out of those tiny shorts she is wearing, my trousers are getting tight again. Trying to not think about it I eat what’s left of my food and drink this shitty coffee till she comes back down with her mug and puts it in the sink.  
“You ready mister” she says once again smiling at me and leaning on the counter in front of me, giving me a great view of down her top. Why does she keep doing this. Does she know she’s doing it. Is she attracted to me cause, god I am to her. I nod at her and place my mug and plate in the sink and move to the door grabbing my crossbow on the way. I wait at the door for her to grab her weapons and we head to the gate.   
“We going out again are we Lucy” Deana calls from her porch with a look of disapproval written on her face.   
“Yes Deana I was hoping I could find some almonds so we can make your own milk. I’m sick of creamer in tea.” Lucy calls out to her making a disgusted face. Deana looked like she had just been hit and just nodded her head. I couldn’t help but smile as Lucy bounced next to me knowing she had won a round in a fight she thought she was losing.   
I enjoyed our time together as she still bounced beside me. We took a look at the walls surrounding Alexandria, they looked strong enough for a bunch of walkers but not strong enough if someone wanted to force their way in. After I started walking into the woods to search for some almond trees for Lucy as she hunted for game.  
“Your slacking Dixon, why aren't you hunting” she looked at me concerned. I couldn’t tell her I was looking for her almonds, to do something for her, all I could do was shrug back at her. I’ve never been one with words, actions speak louder. We carried on for a few more miles and turned back home. Could I call it that yet, I still don’t feel like it is. Home for me is out here in the woods with food I have to work for not in a fridge.   
“Penny for your thoughts?” Lucy touches my arm to get my attention. “You drifted off into space there just missed walking into that tree” I looked back and were she was pointing and saw my path around the tree just missing it.   
“Just thinkin about if this place could be home or if I’m meant to be out here.” She contemplates what I’ve just said. It takes her a while to reply. “I still don’t think if it as home. Home for me is where family is and I don’t have any left. If I met the right people then maybe it would become home. I mean you understand that don’t you, you have your group and it seems like a family of sorts.” She’s not wrong I do feel better when I’m with them or doing things for them but it’s still doesn’t feel like home. “Yeah I guess ya right” she smiles at me again hoping that she has made me feel better.   
“I hope you know what to do with these possums to make them taste better.” I look at her confused until she explains. “Its your turn for dinner” she said with a smile and starts running off back to Alexandria. I run after her hoping she doesn’t hurt herself. As I catch up to her we come out of the trees right near the gate. Walking in we give most of the supplies to Olivia again except one possum. We go back to the house and she go's up to take a shower.   
As I get started with dinner I think about how I would do anything for that girl upstairs and vow to find her those almonds she wants.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for still reading, I'm having a lot of fun with this. Next chapter is were things heat up!!


	4. Plenty of almonds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl brings presents and Lucy feels greatful.

TWO WEEKS LATER

 

Lucy's pov 

 

Things here have changed so much in such a short time. The doctor is dead along with Deana’s husband and son. Morgan came along the night Rick killed the doctor all because the stupid man was jealous that Rick cared for his family and tried to get them away from him. Any man that beats on his wife and kids deserves a lot more than a simple quick dead. No change that to anyone cause it’s not just men that beat on their family’s. With everything happening outside of my house, inside hasn’t changes much. Daryl still goes out side the walls but since Deana won’t let me anymore he brings me back little presents. The at first it was food for dinner and flowers for the ‘house' mumbling something about my ones getting old. Moving on to items he found and didn’t turn in. A few cherries, a box of tea bags, vanilla scented shower products, just little things really but they meant so much to me. The best surprise came today. It was the almonds I said I wanted, two big buckets full. Saying he found a farm with hundreds of trees a few miles out. He even helped me start making the milk, ripping up sheets for me to use. After dinner and we were sat in the sitting room talking about our days.   
“Think it’s time for me to head off the bed now” I said getting up. Before I left the room I bent down resting my hands on his shoulders and kiss him on the cheek for a bit too long being overwhelmed by the smell of him. “Thank you for the almonds Daryl. Goodnight” I rushed out of the room and up to my bedroom already regretting kissing him. I only meant for it to be a quick peck but it wasn’t. With all of the unnecessary sweet things he has been doing for me, I wanted him to know how much I appreciated his kindness. I had to pull away before I was tempted to climb into his lap and kiss him properly. I’m going to have to try and control myself more around him, a little things like this cant happen anymore not until he’s ready to trust me. I still get the vibe off of him that he still doesn’t. If I had a job that would take my mind away from thoughts of him maybe this wouldn’t of happened. I need to get out of that stock room and outside the walls. Just me and the open world for a few hours. You would think I would have time to think out there but I don’t I’m more concentrating on trails and sounds. Before Aaron found me the only rest I would get was up in a tree for a quick nap, to hide from walkers or people and to take stock of what I had and needed. I have too much time to think here. Before Daryl came along I was planning to sneak out and go back to living out there as at lest then I had something to do. I would still but I can’t think of a life without Daryl in it anymore, it almost breaks me to think about.  
As I was pacing a hole in my floor I couldn’t help my hands roam over my body still wishing it was Daryl touching me. I strip off and lay on my bed letting myself get carried away into my current fantasy where he would bend me over the kitchen top and fuck me into oblivion. 

 

Daryl’s pov 

 

She kissed me. I almost pulled her down and kissed her properly and not stopping there. I continued to sit here and decide whether to stop myself from going up and making her mine even just for the night or pushing myself to go to it.   
After a while I decide it’s time to go to bed. As I pass her door like I do every night and lean against it listening to see if she’s asleep. I hear her moaning my name not expecting it I push up against it to hear more. The next thing I know is I’m on the floor of her room as the door had swung opened with my weight. I look up and there she is in all her naked glory hands on her body. She seemed to be trying not to laugh but her eyes were full of lust and desire. “Sorry I’ll let ya get ba-back to errrm bed. Sorry.”  
“Don’t go Daryl please” she said in almost a whimper making me stop in her doorway. Moving off the bed she comes and takes my hand to stop me from leaving. With that single touch, by this beautiful naked woman in front of me, made me the hardest I have ever been. Trying to keep my eyes on hers and not looking at her body is taking all the will power I have. “Come to bed with me.” She says it full of promises. “Come and do to me what you have wanted to for weeks. I have heard you through the walls quietly moaning my name every night. Come live out your night time fantasy's. Tell me what you want.” This is like a dream come true this wonderful girl wants me. But I can’t. Can I?   
“I errrr I mean ummmm” I can’t think while she is rubbing her thumb on my hand gently pulling me into the room.  
All of a sudden she stops and pulls her hand away from mine , I’m already missing the touch. Looking up at me devastated. “Sorry I’ll let you go, I just thought that, that this is what you wanted.” Looking sad she turns from me going to grab her robe. No this is what I want. What can I do.   
I grab her by the waist and turn her around rather suddenly “it is” I moan as she is in my hands her skin softer than I could of ever imagined and still coved in a thin layer of sweat, I didn’t think she could smell better than she already did but she was in this moment. Moving in to kiss her I pause an inch from her lips asking for permission. She moves in the rest of the way and we kiss tenderly at first but soon we are kissing hard and fast. I ask for entrance to her mouth with my tongue and she opens willingly. She tastes like almonds and cherries and soon I can’t get enough, I have to have more. My hands have been rested on her waist but I move them to her hips and move her back towards the bed. I stumble a bit on something and she giggles against my mouth.   
“y'all regret laughing at me in a minute.” I push her onto the bed and I climb on top of her kissing her neck. She stops and is soon moaning as I hit a spot on her neck that makes her shiver, committing where that is to memory I move down to her chest kissing and nipping along her collarbone letting my hands absentmindedly run up and down her side’s. She grabs a hold of one of my hands and puts it on her breast. “Touch me” she whispers. I smile near her shoulder, she wants more. Before she can get my other hand I move my mouth over to her nipple and tease it with my tongue moving in slow circles. She sighs as I continue my assault with my mouth while pull and twist the other with my fingers. I can feel her moving her hips under me wanting some friction.   
With her I want to do something I have never done before. Moving down kissing her along the way I reach my target. Opening her legs wide I lick her with my tongue flat along her pussy gaining a deep moan from her. With my hand I open her lips a slide one of my fingers in her moving it in and out slowly while moving my tongue on her clit. She taste as sweet as she smells and soon I’m intoxicated with its all. I can feel her hands on my head pulling and running her hands through my hair while she moves her hips needing more. I answer her need and slide another finger in rewarding me with another loud moan. I look up at her and find myself surprised that she is looking right back at me. Her eyes are just black with arousal. She starts to quicken under me and throws her head on the bed while arching her back lifting her hips, I hold her down with my hand on her abdomen. “Daryl, oh fuck Daryl!” she screams as she cum all over my face.   
She then pulls me up to her and starts kissing me again tasting herself in my mouth. Rolling me onto my back she kisses my neck and down my body as she undressed me. Reaching my trousers I help her by lifting my hips so she can take them off.  
“Well Mr Dixon I knew you weren’t small but this is just too much.” She says smiling as she grasps me in her hand moving it slowly up and down.   
“Baby if ya don’t get up here I’m gonna bend ya over the bed and fuck ya from behind.” She grins at me while climbing on top. “promises, promises.” She says and before I can reply she lowers herself on to me slowly until I’m fully inside of her. “Fuck ya feel so tight” I moan. As she starts moving I meet her movement making her moan. I reach out for her tits as they bounce up and down teasing her nipples making her moan more. I can feel her tightening around me and I flip us over so I’m on top moving at a faster pace to get her there faster, I don’t think I can last much longer. I bend my head down to her ear, “cum for me baby.” I bite her neck in that sweet spot and she cries out once again. Her climax brought on mine. As I lay on her catching my breath she runs her hands through my hair.  
“If ya don’t stop I might just fall asleep right here.” After I split second she continue play with my hair. “Not a problem at all.” She says and I can hear the smile in her voice. I roll off of her and lay on my back staring up at the ceiling she shuffles over and rests her head on my chest and her leg over mine tightly stopping me fore leaving. “goodnight Daryl” she whispers. Now I’m the one playing with her hair she sighs contently and falls asleep.   
Looking down at this beautiful girl a thought pop’s unto my head. ‘Never in a million years would I see a girl like her wanting a guy like me’. I’m always so short with everyone that they don’t ask me much anymore. But yet around her I can’t seem to stop talking. She makes me nervous, shy and confident all at the same time. I don’t see how she could ever feel the same way about me but I will everything I can to make her happy and safe. 

Falling through that door was the best thing to happen to me since the world went to shit and I will spend as long as it takes to make her feel the same way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was a tad hard to write but I got there in the end. Hope you enjoy and till next time. :)


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As a warning this chapter is a bit long but I didn't want to cut it down any. Not that I didn't try. Enjoy and thank you to those who have left kudos :)

Lucy’s pov

Waking up early to the sound of birds tweeting I shift myself closer to the warmth that is beside me. As I open my eyes I realise that the heat is coming from Daryl. I remember what happened last night and smile to myself running through it again I’m my mind. Moving off of him hoping not to disturb him I find my robe and go make some coffee for us both. Part of my mind is in denial but I can feel the ache in my muscles and know it is true. Him falling through the door was the thing I need to have the confidence to get up and go do him. Seeing his face turning a deep red with embarrassment and his eyes turning black with lust I took as meaning he wanted me too. His eyes never leavening mine contemplating what I was asking. When he didn’t follow me to the bed I thought he didn’t want me feeling rejected I moved from him with my heart breaking slowly. Him grabbing me roughly and pulling my against him shocked me but the way he looked down at me went straight to my groin. He tasted better than he smelt and all of my senses were intoxicated by him.  
With the coffee done I took it back upstairs to wake him up. Walking in my room I saw he wasn’t where I left him. Putting the mugs on the bedside table I went to look for him. Hearing the shower running gave me an idea. I opened and closed the door as quietly as I could, seeing his naked form through the glass I pulled off my robe and climbed in. Putting my hands round his waist I kissed his shoulder. “Good morning Daryl” I say as I kiss him again. He turned around to look at me a bit surprised but soon lent down to kiss me back. Pulling me even closer he deepens the kiss till poking out his tongue asking for entrance. I pull away after a few minutes reaching for the wash cloth and soap, gathering it up I wash down his chest gaining a deep groan from him.  
“ Thought ya had left” He says while moving his hands on my arms “Thought ya regretted last night”.  
“ You weren’t the only one that wanted it and hid in your room to fantasize you know” I say while taking his hand and washing his arm leaving little kisses in the path the soap made.  
“Ya did, but ya were always distant” he says with a look of confusion.  
“You needed to trust me first, and I pulled away to stop myself from jumping you.” Being totally honest with him for the first time in weeks. He bends down and kisses me again. As he lifts me up I rap my legs around his waist putting my hands in his hair. I feel him hardening under me and moan in his mouth. Pushing me against the shower wall he lifts me slightly and guides himself in me slowly till he bottoms out.  
“This is starting to become my favourite place to be” he says while moving. The feel of him all over me and the warm water from above is overwhelming “Daryl fuck me like you mean it”. His fingers dig into my arse cheeks and he mores with more determination. “yes. Oh fuck yes, faster.” I moan loudly as my head falls back against the wall. The sounds he is making is making me climb closer to that sweet release. I pull the hair on the nape of his neck so I have access to his neck and nip at his throat which makes him growl like and animal. “Fuck I’m getting close baby” he shouts while pushing me more into the wall.  
Moaning loudly I cum around him tightly as he follows. He pulls out and lowers me so I can stand. After catching his breath he bends down for the abandoned cloth and starts to clean me.  
I turn the shower off as I get out. After passing him a towel I get my own and start to dry off. Walking off ahead I go to get some clothes for the day. Once dressed I take his lukewarm coffee into his room. “I left to make you this, that’s why I wasn’t next to you” I say while taking a sip of my own shuddering at its taste. I have never been one for coffee but I needed the pick me up. Even thought I don’t need it anymore after this morning’s antics but seems a shame to waste it.  
“Thanks” he takes the cup and my hand and moves to the stairs. “I need food now I’m starving.” He turns to me smiling and raising his eyebrows. We heard a knock at the door as we reached the kitchen. I let go of his hand to go answer it and was faced with one if the women from Daryl’s group. “Is Daryl about” she says while grinning at me. Carol I think her name is. She looks friendly enough with her cropped greying hair and blue cardigan. But there is something suspicious about her, like she’s not what she seems. It’s in her eyes, observing everything.  
“Yes he's in the kitchen. Please come in” moving out of the way and gesturing with my arm for her to come in. Smiling at her as she walks through to the kitchen.  
“Daryl where have to been, I have hardly seen you. Come to dinner tonight.” She says to him. He looks over to me before answering “Can't.” Why is he being so short with her, she obviously misses him.  
“You should go there tonight Daryl. Go spend some time with them all.” I give a quick smile to Carol as I pass her and walk to the fridge taking out a bottle if water. “Take over some of the leftovers we have, we have so much I'd hate for it to go to waste.”  
“Oh your invited too. Please come we would like to get to know you properly. From what Daryl has said we all seem to have the same goals for this place.” Shock passes over my face and I look to Daryl. He smiles shyly back at me giving me a shrug. What has he been saying about me to them. I look back at Carol and she is waiting patiently for my answer. Feeling slightly blindsided “Yes okay. Sure I’ll be there.”  
“Well we will see you both next door at Ricks place say, around 6?” She looks at Daryl and says “Don’t forget to bring Daryl with you. I get the feeling he won’t go anywhere without you.” What was that meant to mean. She left before I could ask. Turning to Daryl trapping him between the counter and me I forcefully ask him. “What have you been saying about me, and what is that stuff about not going anywhere with out me?” He shrinks slightly away from me and I move back just a step not wanting to make him too uncomfortable. “ The way she said it was like I’m all you talk about.”  
“So what if ya are.” It was my turn to recoil away. “Ya already know that since I got here I have thought about you every single night. So I talk about ya, it ain’t a fuckin crime is it.”  
I stand on my toes and pull his head down and give him a quick kiss before he can get too angry at me. “You know you can be quite sweet when you want to be.” Kissing him again he grabs hold of me a lifts me up on the kitchen island. Wrapping his arms around me he buries his head in my neck and starts kissing a nipping at my skin. I roll my head back giving him more room to work with pushing my hips forward as he hits that sweet spot I never knew I had.  
“I could never hurt ya Luc, I’m always thinkin about ya didn’t know I was talkin about ya too.” I look deep in his eyes and know he’d never say a bad word about me unless I deserved it.  
“Its fine, I just overreacted. I thought you might if been talking shit about me.” He went to say something. “shhhh let me talk. I always thought I was the worse at trusting people cause of shit that happened in the past but when I met you. You were even worse than me. That there was me being insecure, it didn’t have anything to do with you really. I need to remind myself that you are not like most men. You say you’ll never hurt me and I believe you. Just remind me every once in a while.” I kiss his cheek as a sorry and smile at him. He looks at me while stroking the skin on my back that has become exposed and moves in to kiss me again signalling the end of the conversation. Just as he starts to lift my top up there is a loud knock at the door.  
“Who the fuck is that” Daryl huffs storming off to the door. As he goes off to see who it is this time I jump down from the island and sort myself out getting ready to go to ‘work'. “ It was Spencer, he was coming to get you. Deana wants to see you.” I huff as I head to get my boots. “Did he say what she wanted at all?.”  
“Na just said she wanted to see ya before ya head off to Olivia’s.” He looks down at me while I get my boots on doing them up at quick as I can. “Ya want me to walk with ya?”  
“ No I’ll go, you can go get some stuff for the dinner tonight if you want. I don’t feel right turning up with leftovers.” He crouches down in front of me. “Ya know they ain’t the royal family, they won’t even can if ya turn up with nothin.”  
“ Nope I would like to turn up with something fresh. Can you get me some more almonds as well please, I might make some cookies if I have the time.” I ask with a smile and cup his cheek. He leans on my hand and sighs so quietly I almost didn’t hear it.  
“Yeah I’ll get some for ya. Now go see what Deana wants before I don’t let you leave and lock ya in the bedroom with me.” Taking a deep shuddering breath I reply “is that a threat or a promise?”  
“ Don’t test me get yer ass moving, I have things to do too, or didn’t ya know” he smiles and gives me a quick kiss before pulling me up with him. As we get to the door he slaps my arse as a warning to hurry up and it sends a rush of arousal through me.  
After we had separated in our different directions I ran up to Deana’s door and knocked loudly. After a few seconds the door opened and Deana lead me inside.  
“ What is it that you needed me for Deana.” I say trying to be as polite as I can but I’m just waiting for her to change my job to something even less enjoyable than the one I have now. So far that is all she has done.  
“I need you to take some shifts in the church town. Rick, our constable, has said that we need to be keeping a look out. Not that I think it’s needed but I can not spare anyone else. You have said on many occasions that we need to be using the tower to keep watch, so I thought you wouldn’t mind.”  
“ No I don’t mind at all. What shifts do you need me to take?” I am jumping up and down cheering on the inside. Finally we are getting somewhere. Slowly admittedly but it’s still a step in the right direction in keeping this place safe.  
“Well I need you to take the 10 till 6. Sasha would usually be taking the night shift but can’t tonight . Something about a dinner she has to be at, so her and Spencer swapped and she is up there now. Just so you know the hours are so long because there are only 3 of you.” She says most of this while shaking her head obviously thinking that this is all unnecessary.  
“ Yes, okay, that’s fine I’ll go get my stuff together. Thank you for this Deana I won't let you down. I walk out of her house after she nods her head at me. I get home and look at the time. It’s half 9 now so I’ll have to be quick. Grabbing a bag from the cloakroom I begin packing some water and crackers and quickly grab my bow and check it over for any damage. I will never regret the months it took me to learn how to use this baby. I didn’t want to be like every other girl there that thought archery was just a cool little hobby, so I bought myself a compound bow and pushed myself until I was just as good, if not better than the instructor. This was before everything happened and people still ruled the planet. I just wish I could find some more arrows for it , I’m down to my last 6 and wood ones don’t work as well.  
Getting up and grabbing my stuff I head to Olivia’s to get a gun. “Going somewhere Lucy?” Jessie calls out to me as she walking Sam and Ron to the school garage. “Finally got my wish of some look outs” I say waving to her as she heads off. I drop into Olivia’s to pick up a long range gun and some bullets. I’ll only be using my bow if I have to but I want to keep it close just in case.  
“Going up in the tower are we. Do you want a book or something. Can’t imagine that it will be very interesting up there.” Olivia asks. She like Deana is in denial with thinking this place is safe.  
“No thanks Olivia but feel free to come keep me company.” I smile at her as she quickly shakes her head “No, no I’m needed here. But you stay safe ok.”  
When I finally get to the town I climb up to relieve Sasha and she turns to me with anger in her eyes. “Don’t fuck up, I’m giving you a chance to prove yourself. Daryl may think your alright but it don’t mean I have to.” She spits at me and barges past. I watching her leave the tower and go through the gates. What is her problem, talking down to me like I’m a little girl. Shaking my head clear I settle down to keep watch. 

 

As the sun crawls across the sky nearing the end of my shift, I remember that I am invited to this dinner tonight. Shit. Oh bollocks. I meant to cook something up for them. Fuck! Great first impression that’s going to be ‘hey nice to meet you, sorry about bring leftovers and smelling like arse. I've been up in a tower all day waiting for something to happen but also hoping it doesn’t’. I see Daryl making his way back with an extra bag on his back, wondering what he found today as he doesn’t have any game on him.  
An hour later I see Spencer leaving his place and moving slowly to the tower with a bag and a big book. No weapons just a bag and a book. Is it only me and Sasha taking this job seriously. I hear him climb up slowly, is he taking the piss right now. He opens the door and sees me looking straight at him. I’m am not fucking happy. “Where’s your gun?”  
“ Oh I forgot can I use yours” he’s trying to act dumb with me. Since I have been here in Alexandria he has tried once a week to get me to go and have ‘dinner' with him. No matter how many I point blank say I’m not interested, he still tries.  
“Why, are you going to climb down and get one for yourself.” After gathering my stuff I make my way to the stairs. “Make sure you actually keep watch and not just read and sleep.” I add before climbing down as fast as I can heading the house hoping to take a quick shower.  
I open the door to find Daryl pacing the floor. He rushes over to me looking me over before saying anything. “Where the fuck were ya! I searched all over for ya. Ya could of left a note for me. I saw yer bow was gone and was gonna go out looking for ya. Rick stopped me telling me to stay here in case ya got back before he did. He's out there now looking for ya!” Shit he sounds pissed. I didn’t think to leave a note. I haven’t had to before one before and it didn’t click that he would worry.  
“I was up in the tower on look out if you had just gone to Deana, Olivia or Jesse, hell even Sasha, you would of known where I fucking was. Don’t get pissy at me just cause you couldn’t even go ask someone where I was!” I was not going to be shouted at like that for no reason. Pushing past him I drop my things in the cloakroom and go up stairs.  
“Where ya going they’re want us next door.” He says a little calmer following close behind me. I turn around “To take a shower so I don’t smell like arse in a room full of people that don’t know me and may not even like me.” I push him back slightly so I can close the door and lock it. Turning the water on I strip quickly and climb under washing all the dirt and sweat off. How did the day turn from amazing to shit all because of a piece of paper. If he’s still in this mood I don’t know if I even want to go anywhere. How am I supposed to be comfortable in a house full of people I don’t know. He is the only one out of the group I know and if he’s like this and avoids me how do I ignore that. I dry myself off and brush my teeth. Rapping the towel around me I unlock and open the door to find him sat against the wall across from me. I go into my room leaving the door open and find some clothes. Putting my underwear on and reaching for my top I feel arms coming around my waist holding me tight.  
“I’m sorry I was just worried.” He rests his head on my shoulder as he holds me even tighter.  
“I get that but you need the believe that I can look after myself. I'm not like the people here. I’ve lived out there from the start . I wasn’t here long when you got here. It’s sad that you think I’m like the rest of them. You need to trust me.” I turn around in his arms and put my hands on his cheeks. “ I won’t forget to leave a note next time. Promise.” He smiles at me and relaxes a bit but still holds onto me. “I need to get dressed, they will be wondering where we are.” He unwillingly let’s me go and passes me my t-shirt. Pull it on and sit down to put my jeans on followed by my boots. He takes my hand and kisses it when I’m done and leads the way. As we pass the kitchen he picks up a dish and we leave the house going next door. I start shaking and he squeezes my hand to comfort me. He let’s go to open the door and let’s himself in leaving me at the doorstop.  
“Come in please. We are all excited to get to know you.” Carol comes over taking the dish from Daryl and moves to the kitchen. 11 pairs of eyes look at me. All of them smiling at me, except Sasha, but I know she doesn’t like me already. Moving in I sit down at one of the empty seats. Daryl stand behind me and touches my shoulder to make sure in ok. Rick speaks up first.  
“Well Lucy I’ll introduce you to all of us. I’m Rick and this is Carl my son and Judith my daughter. This is Michonne” he points to the woman with the dreads “ and next to her is Maggie and Glenn. Abraham, Rosita, Eugene, Tara and Sasha. You have already met Carol.” He takes a small pause before saying anything else. “We have heard from Daryl that you are like us and think this place is lacking in security. We want to change that and would like your help.”  
“I don’t know how much help I can be, Deana only just put me on look out duty today even though I had been asking for weeks. Seems to me your the one changing her mind and things around here.” Michonne leans down to Rick and whispers loud enough for me to hear. “I see what Daryl seeing in her, she’s just a straight talking as he is. Just with more words.” I smile at her as she looks over at me, making it know I heard her. Abraham stands up and moves over to the sofa and moves the coffee table in front of him.  
“Anyone want to play cards while we wait for dinner.” A few of them go too leaving Rick, Judith, Michonne and Daryl still at the table.  
“Would I be able to hold her please. It’s been such a long time since I saw or held a baby.” I ask Rick. He stands and moves over to me passing Judith to me. As I hold her I sniff that baby smell making my heart ache.  
“Did you have children before” Rick asks.  
“Yes I did. A little girl, but she died a year before. She was in a car crash with her dad and neither of them made it. It’s kinder why moved back to the states. Too many memory’s and I couldn’t let go.” I wipe a tear away from my face remembering their faces.  
“I’m sorry that happened to you.” Carol came in and put a hand on my shoulder.  
I take a deep breath and say something that I have always regretted thinking. “Don’t be, they weren’t built for the world how it is now.” Hoping I didn’t say anything wrong I turn to Rick standing up. “She’s beautiful, thank you for letting me hold her.” I move to pass her back but he shakes his head.  
“She’s happy with you, let her be. I’ll take her when dinner is done.” I smile at him as a thank you. I sit back down smiling at Judith as she knots her fingers in my hair and babbled at me.  
Daryl moves away from me and goes to talk to Rick. I can tell it’s getting a bit heated from the way Daryl is standing and I carry Judith into the lounge to watch the card game. I get lost in my thoughts as I stroke Judith head watching her fall asleep.  
“Well didn’t ya think ya should of come told me!” I hear Daryl shout making everyone turn to him and Judith jump slightly, she doesn’t wake up amazingly, I know exactly what they were talking about now. Going over to them I pass Judith to Rick gently and he heads up the stairs to put her down for the night. I drag Daryl out the back door by the hand.  
“I thought we had sorted that out between our self’s.” I ask him I drop his hand, waiting for a reply.  
“We did, I just wanted to know why Rick didn’t come let me know. He said he asked around and found out you were in the tower half hour before ya got to the house. He was just sat there with out a care in the world when I was goin nuts thinkin something had happened to ya.” I go to stroke his cheek to calm him down but he turns way from me heading back inside. He opens the door for me to walk through first and grabs us both plates of food and heads towards the lounge and sits on the floor. I sit next to him and eat my dinner in silence listening to the conversation around me. 

The rest of the night went off with out a hitch. Maggie was asking me all sorts of questions and nodding her head at my answers. As we left Maggie hugs me and whispers “Please look after him, we lost someone he cared for not that long ago. I don’t think he’s fully over loosing them yet.” She pulls back and looks me in the eyes. All I can do is nod my head and smile at her not knowing what else to do.  
Everyone leaves at that point either hugging me, shaking my hand or putting a hand on my shoulder as they left. As we head to our house we hear the door close and Daryl takes my hand. “They like ya.” He says it matter of factly.  
He pulls me in the house and pushes me up against the door holding my head between his strong hands and kisses me hard. I undo the buttons on his shirt and trail my fingers through the smattering of soft chests hair he has. Pulling him closer by his belt loops I feel he’s impressive length on my thigh and touch him with the tip of my fingers gaining a groan from him.  
He picks me up and I rap my legs around his waist as he carries me up the stairs to my room. Putting me on the bed he tries to climb on with me but I put a hand on his abdomen stopping him. Undoing his trousers I push them down along with his boxers and his cock springs free. Taking him in my hand I run my thumb over the slit and collect the precum and use it as a lubricant. He’s thrusting his hips forward in my hand as he moans above me. Moving my other hand to his hip I take as much of his cock I’m my mouth, looking up at him I watch him take a intake of breath and his hands move to my hair tangling his fingers in it. He looks down at me looking up at him while sucking him off and he growls at me, his cock twitches in my mouth. I don’t stop bobbing my head and moving my hand on what my mouth can’t cover. He tries to pull and I swat him away. “I’m close baby” he says trying to get me to stop again. “uhh huh” I hum with him in my mouth and he moans loudly enjoying the vibrations. I hum a few more times until I get my reward. “I’m cumin baby, fuck Lucy. FUCK!” He looks down at me while I open my mouth showing him his cum before I swallow it down.  
I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand. “Now that was sexy as fuck misses.” He says climbing on the bed in front of me pulling me in for a deep kiss. Moving his tongue over my bottom lip demanding entrance. Opening my mouth he starts his tongue in my mouth and moans again. Every moan he makes goes straight to my groin making me more and more aroused. “I can taste myself in ya.”  
He pushes me down on my back and he nips and kisses down to my chest putting one of my nipples in his mouth. He teases and bites at it till I’m shuddering and moaning loudly. He moves one on his hands down and teases my entrance with his fingers. “So wet for me already.” He says looking me dead in the eye. He’s eyes are so black with arousal I can’t see any of the usual blue.  
“Yes, Daryl please.” I plead with him.  
“ Please what” he says smirking.  
“Please fuck me!” I cry at him and pull him on top of me rapping my legs around his waist, pushing my feet on his arse letting him know what I want.  
“Ok baby. As ya asked so nicely.” He grips tightly on my hips hard enough to leave a mark and tilts my hip so he can enter me. He inches in centimetre by centimetre slowly. I start to get really frustrated with him. Pushing my feet down again trying to get him to hurry up but he still won’t.  
“Daryl just fuck me already. Enough of this teasing bullshit.” I shout at him and he slam into me making me cry out.  
“Ya only had to ask.” He said as he sets a gruelling pace making it impossible for me to keep up. As I get closer and closer my fingernails dig into his biceps making him growl with pain and pleasure. “Fuck yes! So fucking wet and tight.”  
I lift my head to his neck and bite him right behind his ear and he starts slamming into me harder.  
As my moans get louder I can feel the pressure of my orgasm building. “I’m so close Daryl.” He tilts his hip slightly and slams into the spot I needed. “FUCK.. DARYL FFFUCK.” I shout his name as I cum hard around him. I pull his head down to me and kiss him as he cums again moaning my name against my mouth.  
He rolls off of me onto his back and breaths heavily. “Where have ya been all me life.”  
“Across the pond.” I reply getting a blanket to cover us. I lay my head on his chest and lift my leg over his, like I had done the previous night and heard him snoring quietly.  
I kiss his chest before putting my head back down and fall sleep smiling wondering how I got so lucky to have found this kind, sweet ruggedly sexy man in this shitty world we now live in.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A herd and the wolves separate Daryl and Lucy from each other.

As the weeks went on we fell into a routine. I would wake up for my shift, he would carry my stuff to the tower. Outside the gates hidden from everyone, he would kiss me and heads off into the woods. He would get back before my shift ended and come and sit with me until it was time to head back. Most of the time now we had dinner at Ricks house, I would play with Judith while they planned on what to do next asking my opinion every now and again thinking I was paying attention. I was always too busy paying attention to Judith learning what she did and didn’t like. I was falling in love with this kid. Whenever she sees me she starts pushing against whoever is holding her and reaches out for me, making little grunting noises till I take her. I was going to be the one looking after her while the others go off to deal with a herd that had congregated at the quarry.   
That morning Daryl was explaining to me what the plan was, “ I’ll be leading the herd away, with Sasha and Abraham, 30 miles out before they break out and swam us.”   
“Daryl I know what and why your doing it but it doesn't meant I have to like it.” I say with my back turned to him washing the breakfast dishes. “Your not going to change my mind on that. I will be worrying about you till you get through that gate unscathed. Did you not even think about me when you offered to do this.” I’m verging on tears now, images of him turning into one of the dead and walking around lifelessly cross my mind. Taking a deep breath I wipe my eyes trying to for get those images.  
“Of course I thought of ya, why do ya think I’m going. I need to protect ya and everyone that’s here.” He says while turning me around to face him. Seeing the look on his face I can see him trying to not get angry at me.   
“You can be such an asshole sometimes. I already said I know why your doing it. I just wish I was going with you. I don’t want to be away from you, not knowing if your coming back or not.” I’m crying now holding his shirt tight in my fists straining the fabric so tight it rips slightly.   
He hold’s my head in his hands, moving his thumb along my cheek bone. He bends down to look my in the eyes. “I’m comin back. I would never leave ya.”   
“Promise me. Promise me you’ll come back.” I grip even tighter pulling him closer just needing him close before he leaves.   
“I promise I’m comin back. Look after little asskicker for me and I’ll be back before ya know it.” Pulling me in for a kiss I loosen my hands on his shirt.   
He grabs his stuff to leave and gets on his bike looking at me before he heads off to meet with everyone else. Rick comes over and passes me Judith giving her a kiss on her head he leaves as well. 

 

After a while Judith starts getting fussy so I go next door to put her down for a nap. I walk in and Carol is putting a casserole in the oven. I head up the stairs and place Judith down when I hear the horn. Running down the stairs to find out what it is I bash into carol. “I’ll go get Carl and get him to come back to protect Judy. We’re being attacked.” She runs out the door before I can say anything. As soon as Carl get through the door I run back to my house for my weapons and my lookout gun I never hand back in and head for the roof.   
Once I’m up there the sight before me is something I can't comprehend. People on the floor obviously dead and more running away to get back to their houses. Taking a deep breath I crouch down so I can aim better and start shooting the disgustingly dirty madmen that have climbed our walls. At first I injure them by shooting their legs out from under them but they keep getting back up. Taking a deep breath I move for the kill. I saw Ron running away from two of them, I shoot one of them and they both drop. Looking down I see that Carl had come out to help. He looks up at me and runs back inside.   
After what seemed like 10 minutes, even thought it was longer, I climb down from the roof to see the damage. Carol comes running up to me. “I need your help moving the bodies. We’re burning the ones that aren’t ours.” Following her to where she needs me I see Deana come in through the gates quite obviously in shock at what had happened. Maybe she'll start to listen more now. If we had more look outs on the walls this may not have happened. I storm towards her about to give her a piece on my mind, I’m distracted by the sound of shouting.  
“OPEN THE GATES!” Spencer rushes over and opens it quickly and Rick runs in and pulls the gate closed before collapsing to the ground. Running up to him I drop on my knees as he lifts his head up. “Half of them broke off and followed the horn. What was it?”   
“We got attacked by a group. I don’t know what they wanted, they just came in and started killing.” He looks at me worried. “No she’s fine, she’s at the house with Carl.” He visibly relaxes and starts to get up. Helping him I take him to his house so he can see that his children are safe with his own eyes.   
As we pass Deana she puts her arm on his stopping us from moving. “ I’m sorry I should of listened to you.” She says before making her way to her house. Shaking his head he starts walking again.  
“Where’s Daryl and the others? A few made it back but we can’t open those gates again.” He looks at me concerned but not worried.   
“We were about 15 miles out when the herd split, Daryl radioed in asking what was going on but we were all to busy trying to get away. The last thing I heard was Glenn telling me it was pointless setting the flares off as they had already reached the town not far from here. A couple of the people that must of escaped from here attacked me in the rv. I ran back here as quick as I could before the walkers surrounded this place.” He sighed and moved his ankles when he sat down on the sofa. Helping him take his shoes off he continued. “Don’t worry too much he’ll be back before you know it and they’ll round up the herd and drive them away too. Then we can fix the wall properly , hopefully making it more stronger while we’re at it.” I stare at him trying to believe him that Daryl is safe, but I can’t. I’ll know he’s safe when I am in his arms.  
“What do we do until then. We have enough food for a few weeks but if we can’t burn the bodies it’s going to start smelling bad really soon . Especially in this heat.” Trying to keep mine and Ricks minds off of what might or might not happen, we need to come up with a plan and keep busy.  
“ We’ll have to put them near the cemetery to keep the smell down wind and hope the wind doesn’t shift. Move the people in those houses closer to the middle of town. Plus set a curfew and minimum noise level.” He starts to get up and reaches for his boots.  
“No, you stay and rest. I'll sort it all out. You just ran for hours with no break.” I say as I push him back down and lift legs up in the sofa and move his boots away from temptation. “I will check in a bit late and let you know how it goes.”  
“ You know I’m glad your the one Daryl has chosen to settle down with. He’s always the one looking after everyone. Now he has someone to look after him.” He closes his eyes after saying this. I check to see if Judith is ok and she’s still asleep.   
I rush down to Deana house and knock on the door. She answers and she looks so tired I almost feel sorry for her. “ Rick has some suggestions with what we should do until the others can get here to lead the herd away.” She waves me in to her living room, sitting down she turns to me.   
“Do whatever it is Rick wants. I don’t know how to deal with this. I thought we were safe and the only threat was the occasional dead one.” She gets and heads for the stairs . I put my arm out stopping her.   
“Your the leader here, your the only one that can enforce these changes.” I say sharply to her getting annoyed at her readiness to just give up. “I can’t go out and tell them all what to do, you have to.”   
“Why can’t Rick?” she says with curiosity.  
“Because he ran for miles and is now sleeping. If anyone deserves some rest it’s him.” Why does she think he can’t do it. It’s not like he’s gone home and put his feet up to watch the football and pop open a couple of beers. “Now get the fuck over yourself and get out there and tell them all that there is now a curfew, noise is to be kept at a minimum and all of the fuckers that attacked us are to be moved to the cemetery.”   
She looks shocked that I had shouted at her. Even though I had been arguing with her almost everyday before ricks group got here I had never sworn at her. “You don’t have to say those exact words, just something to that effect would be nice.” Closing the door quietly as I left I headed to my house to shower and change. I had blood, grime and sweat on me and it was aggravating me more than Deana’s selfish attitude. Walking down the street was very eerie. There were no children running around laughing just the bangs and moans from the walkers trying to get in.   
Running up my stairs I jump in the shower as quick as I can, hoping I can get a bit of sleep before nightfall. I’m going to go up to one of the platforms we had built to keep an eye out for Daryl.   
Finally washed and dried I grab some clean clothes and pull them on. Falling into bed, more tired than I thought i was. I fall quickly into a fitful sleep of blue eyes turning cloudy and decaying hands grabbing for me.

 

I wake up with a start as Rosita is shaking me awake. “ Come one we are needed. Spencer just fucked up and tried to climb over the fence to get help.” I rub my eyes putting the boots on that she is stuffing in my face. “ Do you still have that hand gun? You’ll need to bring it.”   
“Yeah, yeah I got it.” I pull it out from between the mattress and the bed side table.   
“ God you and Daryl are perfect for each other. Never sleeping without a weapon close by.” She says smiling at me and pulling my hand out of the room and doesn’t stop till she points at a part of the wall. “ Go shoot over there. About 4 rounds should do, we need to spread them out again. There are too many near the front.”   
She runs off to the other side of the houses and I hear 4 shots as I get to where she pointed. I do as I’m told and go back to Ricks house to check on Judith. Opening the door I see no-one is here. Running down the street the find Rick I see him just as the tower collapses and the dead start coming inside. Finding the closes house I run up to the roof wishing I had more than just my handgun. Getting a good view of the community my heart sinks. “ We're fucked” I whisper more for myself than anything. 

 

‘Where are you Daryl, I need you!’ my thoughts are the only thing I have to keep me company. It’s started to get cold but I can’t leave as I can hear some walkers inside bashing into things getting confused. I thought earlier was eerie. This is even worse. It’s now just scary. They were everywhere, chomping on bodies that couldn’t get away in time, walking around bashing into each other. ‘Daryl please don’t come. I want you to be safe.’ I start to cry quietly again wishing Daryl was here but also not. It’s hell here right now and I don’t want him walking into it. As it starts getting dark I see someone open a door to my right. I see Rick first in a sheet covered in guts and bodily fluid. He’s trying to get people to safety, or maybe the armoury. Watching them move slowly towards the pond they pause for a minute before moving again. Is that the father going to the church. Concentrating on him I see him holding something under his sheet. A little leg pop’s out for a second. Oh thank fuck Judith is ok! The sound of a scream, shouting and shot ringing out grabs my attention. What the fuck! I stand up to see Rick running with Carl as fast as he can to the infirmary we have here. Michonne is in front of them slashing and pushing any walker that gets in their way. I sigh with relief when the door closes. It doesn’t stay closed for long and then Rick is fighting back the walkers by himself before he is joined by Michonne. A few others join and I’m surprised to see Spencer there helping as well. They make a circle and stab any walker that they come to as they make their way towards me.   
Jumping through the window I used to get up here I grab my knife and kill the walkers in the house before joining them in their stand out front. As I get there I see it has tripled in size and almost everyone in the town is there. It warms my heart to see them all fighting for their lives, knowing now that this is the way we survive. Getting to the closest wall we spread out and stab every walker that comes our way.   
Suddenly there is a loud bang and a huge amount of fire at the pond. Most of the walkers turn and head that way. Before I collapse Rick pulls me in for a hug “Thank you.”   
“What for! Everyone here was fighting for their lives and Alexandria. Go to Carl we'll clean up here.” I push him towards the infirmary and turn to give people things to do. “I know we are all tired but we need to get this cleared. Half of you stay here and the others go to the pond making sure no walkers have survived. Tara can you help me please. “ I ask as I bend down to grab under the shoulders of the closest walker to me. “We need to put them near the gate so we can load them up in the morning and burn them outside of the walls. Tobin can you see what you can do about that wall please. We need it fixed, even just a temporary thing will do right now.”

 

A couple of hours go by before I stop to take a break. The sun has started to rise and most of us are tired but there is so much to get done. I sit down and pass a bottle to Tara and grab one for myself, my mind wanders. ‘Daryl I hope your safe. I don’t know what I would do if you were gone.’ Closing my eyes to stop myself crying, that is when I realise. 

I’m in love with Daryl Dixon!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was quite hard to write but I got there in the end. Next chapter should be up tomorrow. Enjoy!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl searches for Lucy. Not knowing her fate he needs to find out.

Daryl’s pov

 

We turn the corner heading to Alexandra and are shocked as to what we find. The church tower has falling onto the wall and the place is over run with walkers. ‘Lucy please be okay.’ The thought pop’s up in my mind and I have to push it down. I see Maggie and Enid up on one of the watch points which could give way at any moment. I turn to Sasha and Abraham. “Get out, up on the roof. Make a path for one of them to open the gate.” They jump out and I hear them up on the roof. Pulling up to the gate I can hear them shooting.   
“Can ya get the gate, thanks pal.” Abraham shouts out. Glenn opens it and I pull up next to the guard town so Maggie and Enid can get down. Glenn joins me in the cab talking some shit about rounding the walkers up and leading them away.  
“Na I got a better idea.” My thought still can’t keep off of Lucy. We need to make this place safe now and I need to find her. We make our way round to the pond and I jump out and empty the tanker into the water. Jumping up on the roof I aim the rpg at the water and send off a shot. The tower of fire is so hot it feels like it’s on me and I’m burning.   
Standing with the others we stab the stragglers and work our way into the centre of the community hoping to find survivers. Every kill I make I look at their faces making sure it’s not her. My heart is pounding not knowing if she’s safe.   
“Stop, stop.” Aaron shouts at my before I stab him. “ Daryl did you get bit.” He looks at my shoulder and grips his knife tighter.   
“Na it’s just a cut” I say as pain shoots down my arm. Sasha pulls the back of my shirt aside. “Daryl you need stitches. We'll help clear things you go get that seen too.”   
“Na fuck that, It can wait.” I say starting to walk off in the opposite direction. I need to find her, she has to be safe. Can’t they see that. She means more than just a scratch that those fucking Negan guys gave me. Abraham puts his arm out to stop me. “ Look I know your worried, but with the state your in, if she saw you she'd end up kicking your ass for being too stubborn to get it seen to.” I know he’s making sense but I need to know she’s okay.  
“Daryl, we'll find her and bring her straight to you, okay. Please go it might get infected and then what good are you to her then hmmmm.” I nod at her heading to the infirmary. There are a few people out here waiting for something.   
Spencer stops me as I’m about to open the door. “Carl got shot and Denise said she needs space. Ricks and Rosita are in there with her helping.” I sit down on the step and wait running my eyes over all of the walkers I can see hoping I don’t see her face. The sun is up now and as time goes on my shoulder feels even worse. The door opens and Denise walks out and sees my arm dripping with blood.   
“Yours or from the dead.” I pull my shirt back “ You need stitches. Come in.” She looks dead on her feet. “Take your shirt off I need to clean the wound before I can stitch it up.” Taking off my shirt I sit on one of the available gurneys. She cleans and numbs the area before stitching up. The pain I can still feel keeps my mind off of panicking about Lucy .   
She finishes and hands me back my shirt and a bottle of pills. “Two a day for a week. Once you have finished them come see me and I can take the stitches out.” She smiles at me before heading to the door. “Right who’s next.” 

 

I ask a few people if they know where Lucy is but they all say the same thing, ‘haven’t seen her’. The more people I ask the more dread fills my body. I rush up to Sasha “have ya seen her yet.” She shakes her head at me while bending down to pick up the legs of a walker and lifting it onto the bed of a pickup with the help of Enid.  
“If it’s Lucy your after, she’s down at the gate. But we could..” I run off before she can continue. I turn the corner of the last house on the street and I see her. I’m stuck in place with relief staring at her hoping its not a mirage. She’s sat down with Tara drinking and I can see a few tears falling down her face. She is covered in blood but she still looks beautiful to me. Her hair pulled back messily in a bun on top of her head, a few strands falling into her face and down her back. She stands and wipes her face and gets back to piling the bodies to the side of the gate. A thought hits me like a train and affects my whole body. I love this fucking woman. Before I know what I’m doing I run over to her. She turns just before I reach her and let’s out a strangled sod. Taking her in my arms I kiss her like I have never done before, hard and full of love. For once not caring if they all see. I love her and the whole world needs to know. She tries to pull away but I don’t let her. I feel her smile against my mouth as I hold her tighter. She brings her hands up to the sides of my head and forces me gently back.  
“ I missed you too.” She says looking me dead in the eye. I can see a sparkle in her eyes that was never there before. I loosen my grip on her just a bit trying to figure out what it is. She pulls my hands from her back and holds them in hers. That’s when I notice that everyone is looking at me. Turning bright red I bend down and hid my face in her neck. That’s when I hear her sharply breath in. “What happened to your shoulder.” I look at her and she frowns back at me.   
“I’ll tell ya later.” Kissing her again quickly. “Did ya need any help.” She nods at me and points to the bodies. “We need to get them over here for the trucks to make it easier to take them out to burn them.” I nod at her and start lifting the bodies up and carrying them next to the gate. I look over at her every once in a while to make sure she’s still near, most of the time a catch her eye and she smiles back at me. 

 

After what seems like the whole day we head to the infirmary together hand in hand to check in on Carl and to have her checked over. I told her that Carl had survived but I don’t know what happened. “I heard it happen. There was a scream some shouting and a gun shot. I saw Rick running while carrying him. He looked so limp in his arms. I’m so glad he’s alive.”   
We walk in just as Rick comes out of one of the rooms. “Denise, he just woke up. Come quick.” I walk to the doorway after them and see Carl laying on the bed with a bandage over his eye. Little fucker is luck to be alive. I watch as Denise asks him some questions as she checks him over and Rick looks over to me and nods his head at me, mouthing ‘thank you’ at me. Hey I was just doing what I always do. I nod back and head to Lucy as Rosita checks her over.   
She lifts her leg up and that’s when I notice that she has a hole in her trousers. “ I think I cut myself on some glass from a window I smashed.” Pulling them up, she has a huge gash on her calf.  
“You got lucky, it doesn't look to deep. I’ll just clean it up and make sure there’s no glass in it and glue together. If it starts bleeding again come back, it might mean you need stitches.” Rosita bends down and get to work cleaning it up. I look up and see Lucy is looking at me. She reaches out her hand silently asking for me to hold it. I go over and sit next to her taking her hand she grips tightly as Rosita pulls some glass out of her leg. How did I not notice she was limping. I look at her sadly as she lifts her hand and cups my cheek. “I’m fine, it’ll heal. I’ve had worse and had to deal with it by myself.”   
“Still don’t make it any easier to see ya in pain.” I lean my head into her hand as she strokes her thumb on my cheek. She winches as Rosita pushes the cut together and glues it. I grip her hand tighter as comfort. I have no idea if it works or not as she doesn’t open her eyes until her leg is bandaged.   
“ Go home and rest I want you to keep off of that leg for the rest of the day.” Rosita says. Lucy tries to get down from the gurney but I stop her and pick her up bridal style and carry her home. She giggles at me and puts her arms around my neck to support herself.   
The walk home was made longer with people stopping us asking if she was ok and every time she said the same thing. “I’m fine, just a cut. But I’m not allowed to walk.” She says it with a smile and runs her fingers up and down my neck sending shivers down my spine. 

 

When we finally get to the house she bends down and opens the door for us and I kick it closed after we are in. I carry her up the stairs and into the bathroom. I put her down on the edge of the bath so I can turn the shower on. She gets up behind me and snakes her arms around my side to undo my shirt. I shrug it off and let it fall to the floor. She runs her hands up my sides and peppers kisses along my shoulder stopping at my bandage before taking it off for me. She places one light kiss on my cut and I wince. “Sorry” she says moving away from me. I turn and grab her hand pulling her close again. “Don’t be” I say back, taking the bottom of her t-shirt and pull it over her head. I undo her trousers and let them fall. Helping her sit I pull her boots, socks and trousers off. Getting a good look at her she is covered in little scratches and dirt. There’s are also hundreds of little silver lines on her. What had happened for her to have to many scars. Taking her right hand I kiss every cut and scar I come to moving up her arm and moving down the other. She looks down at me once I finish, pulling me up she kisses me softly. Putting her hands out I help her stand up. She undoes my belt and trousers and lets them drop. I sit down and take my own boots and trousers off as she takes her underwear off. She climbs into the shower and sighs. I get in after her and pull her close to me. We stand there holding on to each other letting the water wash away the blood and sweat. I kiss her forehead and reach for the soap and lather up my hands. I pass her the soap and start to ran my hands along her body as she lather up her hands. She sighs as I run my hands along her breasts. I ignore it as best I can and continue the wash her. She puts her hands on my chest and starts washing me. Getting to my back she takes more care. I know she is examining the scars I have, running her fingers along each one and kissing it before she moves on to another. With each kiss I shudder, it’s like each time she touches one the bad memory’s that are associated with it fly away.

 

The water starts to turn cold and we get out. After rapping a towel around my middle I get one for her and rap it around her. She starts to move to the door and I stop her and pick her up again carrying her to the bedroom. I place her on the bed and bend down on my knees in front of her and rest my head in her lap.   
“I'm sorry I wasn't here. I started to worry when I heard that half the herd had broken off and was headin here. I almost made my way back but Sasha and Abraham talked me out of it. When we finally made it back and saw that the walkers were inside, my worry turned to panic.” Tears were starting to spill out of my eyes. I move into her lap so she can’t see my face. She moves her hands to my hair and starts running her fingers through it. “I looked at every walker before I killed it makin sure it wasn’t ya. When I couldn’t see ya I started searchin the bodies thinkin ya were gone. I thought I’d never see ya again.” Just talkin about it hurts my heart. I grip hold of her legs tight trying to say what I feel I need to but it won’t come out.   
“ I was thankful you weren’t here when we we’re attacked cause it meant you weren’t in the thick of it, you were safer away from here. When it was over and I saw Rick running to the gates with hundreds of walkers behind him, I hoped you were far enough away and that you wouldn’t come back. I hoped you put yourself before others for once. I sat stuck on a roof for hours wishing I was with you but never that you were here with me. When I saw Rick and the others making a stand that was what gave me hope that I would see you again. I fought for my life as well as yours.” She lifts my head up so she can look in my eyes. Wiping my face she kisses me softly while pulling me up off the floor. Getting up on the bed I notice her towel has opened exposing her body for me to see. Even cover in scratches she was beautiful. She pulls me on top of her wrapping her legs around my waist and I can feel her soft skin. Reaching down she removes my towel . “I need you. I need you now. Please Daryl.”   
I reach down and positions myself at her entrance. Without moving my eyes from hers I slide into her making her moan. I start moving slowly as she holds my hip’s. She may need me but I need her too, but yet I can't say it. Even though I know she wants me to mover faster I can’t I need this. Supporting myself on my elbows I put my hands on either side of her face, I rub my thumbs along her cheeks. She looks into my eyes seeing something and tears form. Leaning down to kiss her she lifts her head at the same time. We stay like that for such a long time that I realise, this is why they call it making love. Soon I feel her start to tighten around me, so I move a bit faster so she can reach her climax.   
“Oh.. Daryl.. yes....” She moans quietly in my ear, that was all I needed to reach my own orgasm.  
“I love you.” I whisper in her ear so quietly I don’t think she will hear me but as soon as I say it she starts crying softly. I look down at her wondering if the shock of what had happened had finally set in.   
“I love you too Daryl.” She says as she pulls me in for a kiss. Hugging her tight I am surrounded by her scent. “Don’t leave me again. Please.” I can’t say anything I just nod my head against her neck. I can’t promise her that. If me leaving her meant she could be safe and happy then I would.  
She continues to cry for awhile but soon falls asleep. I lay behind her and drape my arm over her waist. She snuggles in closer to me and threads her fingers in-between mine holding tight. I fall into a deep sleep forgetting where we are and what we have to deal with. For now it’s just me and her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I almost cried while writing this. I could end it here if I wanted to, but I won't. Until next time. :)


	8. Chapter 8

Lucy’s pov

I feel hot, too hot. I try to move and something grips hold of me tightly. Still half asleep I panic thinking I was burning alive and thrash around trying to get it off. ‘bang’  
“Oww! Fuck. What ya playin at Luc!” I hear Daryl groan from the floor. Sliding to the edge of the bed on my stomach and look down.  
“Sorry.” I start giggling at him as he’s sprawled across the floor on his back, still naked, rubbing his hip.  
“Ya got a mean kick on yer missy.” He gets up from the floor and climbs back in bed. “What time is it anyway.” He says while yawning and rubbing his eyes.  
I look out of the window and see the sun just above the wall. “I’d say about 6:30.” Rolling back over I cuddle up to his side and rest my chin on his chest. “I am sorry about kicking you out of the bed. I thought I was being burnt. Your so fucking hot.” He looks down and smirks at me raising his eyebrows.  
“Why yes I am. Is that all ya want. A nice piece of ass on yer arm.” His still smiling at me when he says it but I see in his eyes that he needs to know that it isn’t the only reason why. I pull myself up and put one of my legs over him, straddling him he takes a deep breath. I lean in pushing my hips down and watch him as he moans closing his eyes.  
“ No it’s not I love you because you put everyone else before yourself.” I kiss his forehead. “The way if someone asks for something you try your hardest to get it.” The tip of his nose. “ The way you care for Judith like she was your own.” Then his cheek. “ But what I love the most is that you love me right back.” I kiss his lips quickly. “How sexy you are is just a bonus” I add before running off to the bathroom. He usually runs after me but this time he doesn't. I take this time to brush my teeth and take a proper look at myself in the full length mirror. Holy shit I look like crap. The bandage on my leg looks like it needs changing and both my arms and legs are covered in scratches. A warmth flows through my body, he loves me even though I look like this. My hair is all matted on the top of my head, my eyes have such big bags I look like I haven’t slept in weeks and I look like I’ve been in a fight with a pack of cats. I pull my hair down and brush it out, not stopping until all of the tangles are out. My hair is now at waist height. It really needs cutting, but the colour at the ends is all I have left of the old world. Having a moment of selfishness I play with the ends and wish I could redo the colour. Thinking back to how it was the most confident I had ever been. Nothing got in my way and if I wanted something I would do anything to achieve it. Sighing I grab my dressing gown off the back of the door and head to the kitchen. Grabbing a glass from the cupboard and pore some water into it. Looking out of the window I notice that the streets are cleared and that it was like nothing had ever happened. A muffled banging was all I could hear. Tobin must be up fixing the wall.  
Jumping slightly as Daryl takes the glass from my hand i hear him chuckle. “Why we are jumpy right now.” I turn around and look at him. He had put on a pair if trousers and was wearing nothing else. A flush came up to my face. Will I ever get used to seeing him like this.  
“Well if you weren’t so bloody quiet I would of heard you coming.” I reach up and tangle my fingers in his hair pulling him in for a kiss. I run my tongue along his top lip wanting to deepen the kiss. Obliging me he opens up and allows me entrance. He tastes of mint and himself and I moan loving it. He picks me up and places me on the top.  
“Ya say all those nice things and then left me hangin.” Moving to my neck he trails kisses along it until he hits my sweet spot. Shivering I pull him closer. He opens my robe and runs his hands down my sides making me shiver even more. I tug on his hair and force his head back to mine and kiss him hard, pushing my hips forward feeling his growing hard on straining against the fabric of his trousers. He moans into my mouth and pushes his hips back. I lightly touch my fingers to his chest and move them down till I reach his trousers and undo them, letting them drop to the floor. I take his extremely hard cock in my hand and move in a teasingly slow pace. He starts to move his hips faster trying to get me to go faster but I let go. He sighs with frustration.  
“There ya go again leavin me hangin.” He says in my ear as he pushes his cock on my thigh. I moan, bending my head back I push my hips forward more. I’m bearly on the counter anymore and he’s having to support me with his hands on my arse. He squeezes my arse cheeks hard and bites my sweet spot making me push more into his hands. Putting my hand back on his cock I position him at my entrance and push down a little hearing him moan as he enters.  
“So fuckin wet and tight baby!” I push down even further as he pushes up trying to get himself all the way in.  
“Only wet and tight for you.” I say in his ear before biting the soft skin under his jaw. He growls at me deeply before thrusting harder. I let out a loud moan making me move further off the counter. Gravity is becoming my new best friend as he is now deeper inside of me.  
“I’m close Daryl. Please I need more.” He puts his hand between us and starts moving his fingers in circles on my clit making me moan more.  
“Daryl... Oh yes... fuck...” I cum hard clenching almost painfully around him. I feel his hot cum shooting up inside me bringing on another orgasm just as powerful as the first. The last thing i remember is collapsing onto his shoulder.

“Lucy! Fuck Lucy! What the fuck did I do to ya.” I open my eye's and find I’m in Daryl’s lap on the floor. He's holding on to me so tight it’s hard to breath. I try to move but he holds me tighter. “I’m so fuckin sorry Luc. Please forgive me.”  
“What you sorry for.” My voice comes out as a whisper. I try to take a deep breath but can’t. I try to wriggle out of his grip on me. He loosens a bit but doesn’t let me go.  
“Ya passed out. Did I hurt ya. Fuck I did didn’ I. Shit I'm so sorry Luc, I didn' mean to. I’ll go get me stuff and leave.” He tries to stand up. As he wipes his face I can see the tear flowing down his face. I grab his arm with one hand and move the other to his face.  
“Have you never made a woman cum so hard they pass out before Daryl.” I smile at him and he lifts his lips slightly while shaking his head. “I find that hard to believe.”  
“Na but none of them were anything special. Ya are Luc. Ya mean so much to me. I never want to hurt ya.” A tear slips out of his eye and I kiss it away.  
“You didn’t hurt me Daryl, I know you never would. Please look at me.” I take a deep breath. “Don’t ever say that you are going to leave me. You are what has made this place home for me. If you left I don’t know what I would do.” It was his turn to kiss my tears away, I take his face in both on my hands and make him look at me. “I love you Daryl. I’m In love with you!” he kisses me lightly on my lips. He starts to get up while lifting me at the same time. Carrying me to the bedroom he puts me down on the bed before leaving the room.  
Why did he leave? Did I say something wrong. I open my draws looking for something to wear, my head fills with thoughts as to why he would act that way. He didn’t hurt me, I thought I had said that. I did I’m sure I did. Did I? Shaking my head I dress myself. Once I’m done I put on a brave face and head to his room. The door is open and he’s laying on the bed looking at the ceiling. He’s wearing his usual clothes. But his grey checked shirt has sleeves, one of the very few he owns that haven’t been ripped off of. It’s one of my favourite shirts he has. It’s soft and warm. Standing in the doorway I don’t dare move any further, I get hit with the smell of him and my knees go weak.  
“Did I say something to upset you?” I ask quietly. After a while I don’t think he hears me so I start to move quietly away. The floor board creaks under my foot and he sits up.  
“Did ya mean what ya said before and after ya pass out?” he looks at me hopeful but guarded. I know what I said after but what did I say before. He comes and stands in front of me. He’s looks in my eyes looking for something. “Do ya even remember what ya said just before?” I shake my head at him.  
“It’s all a bit blurry. All I remember is falling onto your shoulder.” I look at him and he looks a bit upset. “Did I say something mean?” He shakes his head. “So it was something nice.” He nods.  
“It was somethin wonderful, somethin no-one has ever said to me.” He moves back into his room and grabs a shoe box out of the wardrobe. He hands me the box and leaves.  
Opening it up I see so many small things. Going and sitting on his bed I pull them out one by one. The first is a twine bracelet with little flat squares of jade threaded through out. The second is a very long rope necklace with a big polished bit of jade on. 20 green feathers and a dried pressed green rose. The last thing in the box is a letter.

 

_Lucy_  
_I may never give you this box but I’m so shit with words hopefully writing them will explain how I feel. I need you to know that from the first time I saw you I knew you were different . That if I saw you back in Georgia before everything went to shit I would want you. But I know you would of never wanted me back. I don’t look like the type of person you would be with. I’ve always look like I belong in jail and you look like you should be living in a mansion. I know you have told me that we both would be considered as not ‘normal' in the eyes of everyone but I don’t care. To me you look like a princess and you need to be treated like one too. My life hasn’t been easy and I have a feeling neither has yours. I saw the scars covering your body and I want to kill whoever did that to you. I want to be there to protect you for the rest of my life but if leaving meant you would be safe I would._  
_When you said you loved me my heart grew in size and I had never been happier, that was until you asked me to be yours. I love you Lucy more than you can ever know. I will spend the rest of my life, if I have to, to make you as happy as you have made me. I will love you for the rest of my life Lucy._  
_I will forever be yours but will you be mine?_  
_Love Daryl_

 

He says he’s shit with words but yet I’m sat here in tears blubbering like a god Damn fool. Jumping up a rush out of the house to find him. I run into Rosita as I get out of the door. She turns to me concerned. “What wrong Lucy?”  
“Have you seen Daryl?” I ignore her question I need to find him now. He needs to know I feel the same.  
“Yeah I just saw him at the pond. Is everything ok with you guys he didn’t look to happy.” She asks, her face full of worry.  
“Yes fine, I just need to tell him something.” I run off bumping into quite a few people, some concerned but most of them annoyed. I ran full on into someone as I was turned saying sorry to someone else. We ended up on the ground, pushing myself up I saw that it was Rick.  
“Shit I’m so sorry Rick!” I help him get up and he brushes himself off. Looking down at me he brings his hand to my face and wipes a tear off with his finger. He looks worried.  
“Are you ok? Did Daryl do something?” he doesn't say it meanly, he’s just concerned for me and his friend.  
“No, well yes but it’s not what you think. I need to find him before he goes off to hunt.” I start to rush off again but Rick stops me. He pulls me back by my arm and looks down at me.  
“Your going the wrong way. He was at the pond but he just went in to the armoury. If you want to catch him that’s where he is.” He smile at me and let’s me go. I continue running and when I get to the armoury Daryl is stood outside walking off with my bow.  
“Oy that’s mine!” he turns to me, looking surprised. Taking my bow off of him I drop it on the floor and pull him down to whisper in his ear. “Yes I will.” He bends down and picks me up and before I can wrap my legs around him he kisses me hard, much like he did yesterday. He spins me around and I can't help but giggle. Before he looses his balance he puts me down. “Why do you have my bow anyway?”  
“I needed it for huntin as I don’t have me crossbow anymore. Didn' think ya'd mind.” He says looking at me asking for permission.  
“Yes you can use it but you might want to loosen it a bit, I have it quite tight. Don’t want you hurting yourself.” I smirk at him as I loose the bow a bit. Handing it to him he gives it a try.  
“Fuckin hell girl how tight do you usually have it.” He says while straining to pull it back.  
Loosening it a bit more I hand it back. “ As tight as I need it. Now go catch something good. I want to go check in on Carl and make sure he’s doing ok. I will see you later at home.” I walk away from him and head to the infirmary.

After Denise checks my leg and changes the bandage i check in on Carl. He seemed to be in good spirits which was surprising seeing as he had been shot in the eye. Lucky for him it had bounced off of his socket or he would be dead. Denise came in and did a check to see if he was alright to go home. When he was given the okay I helped Rick and Michonne get him home. We set him up in his room with a glass of water. Poor kid was tired after the short walk home. Leaving him we sat down for awhile and chatted about nothing. I was just trying to keep their minds off of what had happened. I left just before dinner and headed home hoping Daryl was back. Getting to the door I find it locked. I knock on the door and Daryl opens it pulling me inside. There were pots and pans on every surface in the kitchen and plates set at the table. It smelt amazing . Pushing me gently towards the table he pulled a chair out for me and then sat next to me. Taking a bite I realise it’s deer and look over to him.  
“Buck or doe?”  
“Buck, it’s the end of breeding season. Couldn' kill a doe even if I wanted to.” He mumbled in my direction. I’m not surprised that he has kept track of what season it is. But what does disturb me was how he said it. What happened for him to be so short with me.  
“What happened?” turning myself to face him he’s drops his fork.  
“Pulled me fuckin stitches using ya bow. Lucky I had already killed this or I wouldn' of had anythin for ya.” I bend down to look him in the eyes.  
“I don’t need you to catch and cook me dinner for me to know you care. Just remember that the next time you try to use my bow.” Turning back to my dinner. “Not that this isn’t very much appreciated.” I see him smile from the corner of my eye.  
After we had finished I took the plates into the kitchen. Filled the sink with hot water I make a start on the mountain of washing up. How did he even end up using so many pots. I laugh out loud not meaning to.  
“What ya laughin at” he asks holding his hand out for the pots to dry them.  
“Just that I think this is every pot we own. How did you end up using all of them.” He looks a little ashamed and continues drying the pans I pass him. “ Dinner was amazing by the way. A very nice surprise to come home to.”

When we finally finish and put everything away he takes me by the hand and directs me to the bedroom. I see his bag on the floor and looks at me. “I was thinkin, I spend all me time in here anyway I thought that, maybe, if yer okay with it, I'd put me stuff in here.” I wish he would take charge sometimes and just do these things. Picking up his bag I place it in his. He looks sad at me and turns to move back through the doorway. I grab his arm before he can move too far away. I unzip the bag and grab his clothes and open a draw I had emptied days ago.  
“There is another one over there. Put the rest in there.” I point to the wardrobe and he moves over to it. After we had put all of his clothes away he pulls me close.  
“I just want ya to know this is all new to me. I ain’ ever had a girlfriend before. Weren' worth the hassle with the girls I knew.” Finding that very sad I lean in to kiss him. He pulls me in more and we collapse onto the bed. I start to undo his shirt and he stops me, sitting up on his elbows. “Strip for me.” He sits up as I stand up in between his legs and pull my top off and throw it off in the direction of the hamper. Turning around I undo my jeans and bend over so my arse is just in front of his face and pull my trousers off. Turning back to him I sit on is lap and take my bra off leaving my in just my knickers. He runs his hands up my body and as he reached my breasts his thumbs brush along my already hard nipples. Letting out a squeak he giggles before taking one of them in his mouth and circling his tongue around it and biting softly before doing the same to the other. I undo his shirt and run my hands down his arms getting it off of him. Reaching down I undo his trousers and stand so I can get them off. I’m about to sit back on his lap when he stops me. His hands on my hips , circling he thumbs lightly, he looks up at me looking more aroused than I have ever seen him. It’s almost scary but it also fills me with lust.  
“Do ya trust me. I mean really trust me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry about the little cliffhanger. Or am I!   
> Enjoy and thank you for all the hits so far.


	9. Chapter 9

Daryl’s pov

 

She looks down at me slightly wary. Just as I’m about to reconsider. She move forward just a step. “Yes Daryl I trust you.” She whispers. She looks so fucking sexy right now. Her hair is hanging down her back brushing the top of her ass. Her tit’s just in my face, nipples so hard they are begging for attention. I roll her panties down her legs for her to step out of before I pull her down and roll so I am on top of her, she moans as my cock pushes against her already wet pussy. Pushing away to stand up she whimpers from the lack of contact.

“Get up the top bed.” I demand. I've never been the dominating type but with her i want to try new things. She uses her legs to push herself up giving me a great view of her lower half. My cock twitches at the sight. She looks at me waiting and wanting, eyes so dark that it makes me want to forget my plans and just bury myself in her. “Good girl. Now stay right there.” I got to the wardrobe and grab a few of the scarfs I saw in there earlier. I sit on the edge of the bed wrapping the first scarf around one of the lower bars I look at her asking if I can restrain her. She puts her wrist in my hand and nods her head. I tie it tightly in a bow, wanting to be able to get her out quick if I need to. Doing the same with the other I stand at the end if the bed looking at her and placing my hands on her ankles. I pull her down sharply and she let’s out a squeak of surprise. I tie one of her feet to the foot board leaving the other untethered. “Ya look so fuckin sexy right now Luc.” I move up the bed and bend to her ear. “Tell me to stop if it gets to much okay!” she nods her head and with that I start kissing and nipping her neck, making my way down slowly. Putting my hands on her tits I twist and pull her nipples. She lifts her back so her tits are pressing more into my hands. God the way she reacts with just a touch make me so horny. Leaving my hands to play with her nipples I work my way down already smelling and feeling the heat coming from between her legs. Lifting her free leg I put it over my shoulder, trailing kisses up her I stop just at the top of her thigh. Wanting to test and see if she will stop me if I go to far I bite her soft but slowly increase the pressure till she stops me. She moans at first and then grits her teeth.

“Stop, stop..” I look down and she has a bruise forming in the shape of my teeth. I can see that the skin has almost broken in places.

“Why didn' ya stops me.” I look up at her actually quite annoyed she’d let me do that much damage to her.

“You said to stop you when it became to much.” She looks down at me angrily. “ I did. Don’t get fucking annoyed with me just cause you don’t know what I can and can’t handle.” She’s right I don’t and that’s why I did it. But seeing the mark I have left her is making me angry with her. She should of stopped me way before that. She’s gonna pay for talking to me like that.

I put one of my hands under her hip and lift her off the bed. I run the my tongue flat along her pussy making her arch her back and push her hips forward she moans slamming her head back in the pillow. Teasing her entrance with my tongue she tries to move herself down for more contact. I put my other hand on her abdomen to stop her moving and flick my tongue on her clit until I feel her start to shake. I stop just before she can orgasm.

“Daryl please I was so close!” she whimpers. I lift my head to look at her and just shake my head. I run my hands up and down her legs waiting for her body to come down from her almost high. When she stops moving I do it all again. This time adding a single finger into her and brushing against her g-spot. She moves her hips like a woman possessed. I stop once again just before she can orgasm and smile up at her.

“For fuck sake Daryl what are you doing.” She is almost shouting at me. I was expecting this though. I remember sneaking into my brothers room late at night when he would have his mates over and they would be talking about all the girls they had slept with. Merle would say he would keep getting the girl almost there but stop until she was screaming at him calling him an asshole. After that he would let her cum and it would be so intense she would end up loving him. I always wanted to try it, but I only ever had one night flings. I saw no-one special enough that I wanted to make ‘love' me, until now. This beautiful, really frustrated, naked woman laying in front of me is special to me and I want to make her happy. If taking a bit of abuse to do that for her, I will and a whole lot more.

I get her almost get her there two more times before she is shouting so loud I think someone might hear. Fucking hell she is beautiful when she is angry. “THAT’S IT. FUCKING UNDO ME RIGHT NOW YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE. I’LL DO IT MY FUCKING SELF YOU CUNT.” I wince a bit at her words but I let her shout at me. “ DARYL FUCKING LET ME OUT RIGHT NOW!”

“Now, now no need to be mean. All ya had to do was ask nicely.” I bend my head back down and put two fingers in her moving in and out with speed every now and again pushing on her g-spot. Moving my tongue with just as much energy I feel her quickening.

When she cums it’s glorious and messy. “FUCK. FUCK.FUCK DARYL FUCK.” My face is covered in her juices. Licking over her pussy I clean her up a bit. She sighs and relaxes herself back on the bed. I wipe my face with my shirt and undo her restrains rubbing her limbs as I go up her body, helping get the blood flow back to them. When I’m done I lay next to her and she rolls and hugs me.

“I’m so sorry I was mean to you. Just what were you fucking playing at Daryl.”

“I once heard me brother takin about it and I wanted to try it but never found the right girl. Didn’ ya like it.” I ask her sheepishly hoping she doesn't kick me out.

“Daryl I don’t think I could love you more right now but in the moment I could of fucking kill you. Why didn’t you just tell me you were edging me. You just sat there and took everything I was saying at you.”

“I wanted ya to feel good and if takin some abuse meant that ya would, I'd do it all again.” I smile down at her stroking her hair. “I love ya Luc, I wish I could give ya the world but I don’t have much. So I’ll do what I can to make ya feel happy.”

“You do make me happy Daryl. You don’t have to give me things to make me happy. I’m not materialistic, I just want you.” She moves up and kisses me all over my face before kissing my lips. “Now how about we sort you out.” She raises her eyebrow at me smiling as she straddles me.

“Ya don’t have to Luc, I’m betting yer fuckin tired.” She positions herself above my cock and slowly moves down on me. She is looking at the ceiling making an oh face as I enter her. I hear myself moan as I bottom out and hold her hips still just enjoying the feel of her around me. She bats my hands away letting me know it’s her turn to be in control. Moving slowly at first she moans softly every time she goes down. I stare up at her losing control and I feel my muscles starting to tighten. “Luc I ain’ gonna last long.” I say as she moves faster. She puts her hands on my chest, either side of my heart, to support herself. I place mine on hers and hold them pinning her in place. She looks me in the eyes and bends to kiss me muffling my moans as I cum.

She lays on my chest breathing heavily leaving me still inside if her. “I love you Daryl.” “I love ya too Luc.” I wrap my arms around her and we stay like this for along time. “Luc I think we should get some sleep. I gotta go out with Rick tomorrow.”

“hmmmmmm.” She hums on my chest. She is knackered, I roll her onto her side and curl around her holding her back to my front. She grabs my hand and puts it up near her face and kisses it before putting it down under her cheek. I smile and rest my chin on her head before falling into a deep dreamless sleep.

 

I wake up and the sun is up and Lucy isn’t in the bed. Getting up I head to the shower and find her in there under the water. I climb in behind her and wrap my arms around her middle. “Mornin beautiful.” I kiss the back of her head and reach for the soap.

“ Good morning to you too.” She says kissing me on the cheek before she gets out. I wash quickly thinking I’m already late. I was to meet Rick at the gate at 9. When I rush down the stairs doing the buttons up on my shirt I see Lucy holding out my backpack to me. She doesn’t look happy. I frown at her while taking the bag.

“Look I know you need to go and you know I don’t like it but, just come home please.” She pulls my head down and kisses my cheek and before I can say anything she rushes out of the house. I meet Rick down at the gate where he’s already waiting sat on the hood of the car. He looks at me and smiles.

“Really Daryl why are you so late.” He says giving me a playful shove. “Oh fuck off Rick.” I open the passenger door and slump down. He gets in and pulls through the gate and we make our way out. We have so many essential we need to find and keep coming up empty handed. Today has to be the day we find it.

 

 

On the way back to Alexandria I’m sat next to the fucking asshole that made us lose a huge van full of stuff we needed. Rick keeps being a dick and making this Jesus guy fall into me. The last time he does it I shove the dude so he’s laying down on the other side of the seat. I offer to keep an eye on him if Rick can tell Lucy where I am. I know she’ll worry if she don’t know where I am. I think about her as much as I can trying to keep myself awake but end up falling asleep.

Next thing I know is Lucy is shaking me awake. “Where’s the prisoner?” she says frowning at me. I jump up and take a quick look round.

“ Aaaa Shit.” I look at Lucy and grab her arm pulling her out the door. “Ricks.” We run down to his house telling everyone from our group we pass to come with us. All of us armed we storm in the house only to find the guy casually sat on the stairs waiting for something. Suddenly Rick and Michonne come running out busy trying to get dresses. I can’t contain my smirk and raise an eyebrow at him. He frowns at me which make me smile more. He was doing what he thought I was this morning and he knows I know.

We take Jesus down the stairs and sit with him in the living room. When Rick finally joins us him and Michonne stand really close together. It’s so obvious something happened with them. I can’t even look him in the eye without wanting to laugh. There he was this morning taking the piss. I feel like I want to do the same but it’s not the time. This Jesus guy has something to tell us.

 

 

 

We are on our way to the hilltop. Driving down the dirt road I keep my eye on Jesus trying to figure out if this is a trap. “Calm down Daryl. He could of just kill Rick and Michonne when they were sleeping. There has to be a reason why he didn’t. Let’s hear the leader at hilltop out and if things go shit then we’ll deal with it then.” I don’t feel comfortable having Lucy here but she wouldn’t take no for an answer and just got in the rv.

When we get there we are ushered into the main house. Lucy stays outside and picks up a guitar that was laying down need the campfire and starts absentmindedly plucking the strings. I can still hear her as the leader guy looks us all up and down and tell us to go get cleaned up. Most of us go up the stairs but a few stay down stairs. I see Lucy and a few others all sat round the camp fire, another guy seems to be playing as well. I open the door and hear that they are playing. Its a song I vaguely recognise. Lucy sings and looks up at me and I have to sit down other wise I might fall.

_When you don't know what you're running from_

_But there's a dark place in the back of your mind_

_Just waiting to shine, searching to find_

_The courage of mind, hidden inside_

_I'm the reason that it fell part_

_If I could take it back I would, but I can't_

_Finding a way, a selfish escape_

_Trying to wait, but I just can't take it back_

_Towards the stairs to lovers_

_All my life_

_I've been searching Unravelling the pieces for the truth_

_All my life_

_I've been waiting Fighting for the day when I'm with you_

_All my life_

 

She looks at the guy playing the guitar and nods her head and closes her eyes.

 

_I've been the writing on the wall_

_Treading the line just to see if I fall_

_Always the one giving the call_

_Try to forget it happened before_

_I've been searching for a paradise_

_Given the choice, I would make it our lives_

_Try to hold on, but always give in_

_Try to be strong, but I'm running once again_

_We're still distant lovers_

 

She acts as back up for the verse. Keeping her eyes closed and nodding her head along with the guy slapping and tapping his foot on the floor. I’m guessing he’s wishing he had some drums right now.

 

_All my life_

_I've been searching_

_Unravelling the pieces for the truth_

_All my life_

_I've been waiting Fighting for the day when I'm with you_

_Cause I'm alive_

_I'm on fire_

_I'm gonna find the broken pieces of you_

_Cause you're my life_

_Yeah, you're on fire_

_Yeah, gonna fix the broken pieces of you_

_All my life_

 

She opens her eyes again looking up at the sky seeing something the others can’t. A single tear runs down her cheek.

 

_When you don't know what you're running from_

 

They all sit there playing in harmony and I can’t take my eyes off of her, she is so beautiful in this moment. I can almost see what she was like before. Surrounded with friends playing music or even maybe performing in front of a crowd.

 

_All my life_

 

She has such a expressive singing voice. I’m so happy I can see this side of her. I just know it’s going to be something that sticks with me. She suddenly looks at me fiercely trying to get me to understand something. I watch her mesmerized by how amazing she truly is.

 

_Cause I'm alive_

_And I'm on fire_

_I'm gonna find the broken pieces of you_

_Cause you're my life_

_Yeah, you're on fire_

_Yeah, gonna fix the broken pieces of you_

_All my_ life

 

I wipe a tear that has fallen down my cheek. I watch her do the same before looking at the other guys, smiling at them she shakes theirs hands and puts the guitar down. Does she really feel that way about me. How did I not know she could sing. We have lived in the same house for almost two months now. I thought I knew her inside and out.

The gates open and they call some guys name. The hilltop leader comes out followed by rick and the others. The stupid idiot gets stabbed and all hell breaks loose. Rick goes insane on the guy who attracted first. I join in not wanting the guy closest to Lucy to hit her, even by accident.

 

Once things had calmed down a bit I looked around for Lucy but couldn’t find her. Rick grabs my arm and pulls me in the house. I’ll have to find her after, she can’t of gotten to far.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song is All my life by Elliot minor.   
> Thanks for reading and enjoy :)


	10. Chapter 10

Lucy’s pov

As soon as I saw Jesus I knew things were going to go tits up. It was at that point I need to let Daryl know how I truly felt. When we got to hilltop I saw a little campfire set up with a guitar lent up against one of the tree logs. I refuse to ever go in that house again. I had been here before, Jesus knew me but he knew how to keep his mouth shut. But I knew for a fact that Gregory couldn’t. I may have to remind him how dangerous I can be.   
I sit down plucking at the strings until a song pop’s into my head. Starting to play I hear another playing it too. They come and sit next to me. Another sits on my other side taping his legs and hitting them to the rhythm. The only thing that would make me happier would be if Daryl was sitting right across from me.   
As if answering my pray he came out of the house and sat on the steps looking right at me. I sing the song as if it was make for us. Meaning every single word of it. He doesn’t know some things about me that he deserves to know. But I’m afraid I will break his heart. I close my eyes trying not to cry at the thought of it but I can’t stop one tear escaping.   
Looking up at the sky I think of the past two month and how they have been the happiest I have had since the turn. When we come to a point in the song that I need him to understand. He needs to understand that I love him so much and that no matter what happens I will always be there for him. Even to pick up all of the pieces of the destruction that is inevitably coming.   
When the songs finished I wiped my face and thanked the others. They obviously turned around and said I should come back so we could do it again. I felt the same way I have been so starved of a musical outlet since I left my last community a year ago. Shaking my head to get rid of those thoughts I watch as three people barge through the gates calling out for Gregory. Gregory comes out of the house and I slink back towards the wall behind me. He really need to not see me right now, not until I know he will not say anything.   
Someone stabs him and before I can attack on instinct Rick comes barging past and goes crazy on the guy. I would never say I was afraid of him before this moment. But hell I would hate to be this guy right now. One of the hilltoper’s i recognise looked as if he was coming straight for me, Abraham jumped in the way just in time and was now being choked. Once again, before I could react, Daryl came out of absolute thin air, grabbing the guys arm and breaks it in one fluid motion and pushes him to the side. He looks at me making sure I’m okay before heading towards the house with Rick.  
I have to get out of here. Now! I am more than sure Andy had recognised me. Hell I recognised him and it’s been almost a year since I was last here. But how could he of, I was here all of a week before being kicked out and kept myself locked away in the house. Moving round the wall I find a bunch of logs to sit on. I sit there and think for such along time. 

Before I know it Daryl is calling for me. Moving away from my perch I walk out to the main area seeing him on the other side heading the wrong way.   
“Daryl, over here.” I shout out to him waving my arm just above my head. He runs over and puts his hands around my waist. Pulling me close.   
“It’s time to go. Where’d ya go anyway, couldn' find ya anywhere.” He looks down at me concerned.   
“ I was just sat near the wall. Didn’t think I was needed in there.” I point behind me. “Anyway how could you not find me, with your tracking skills your like a blood hound.” I smile up at him. He grabs my hand and pulls me to the rv.  
“Maggie managed to get us a deal, we now have food. It’ll do for a few weeks. Then we’ll have to come up with a new deal no doubt. The guy that leads this place is a piece of fuckin work. Won' even see us till we're all clean then refuses what we offer till he get stabbed and has no choice.” He looks really pissed so I let him talk. Not really knowing what to say, I already know Gregory ’s an asshole. Nothing new to me. I nod my head when I have to and escape back into my mind. We are getting close to home when he says something that I never wanted to hear again in my whole life.   
“Can you repeat that please.” I ask trying not to shake.   
“I said we gotta attack one of these ‘saviours' bases for the food. That was the deal. Ya ok Luc, ya've turned really pale.” I nod my head trying to keep my hands from shaking. We are so extremely fucked now. First the talk going around about Negan. I can ignore that cause it could be nothing but with adding the saviour’s. I have to get out of here. I can’t stay any longer. It’s going to break Daryl's heart but I need them all to be safe. Even if it means going back to Negan and resuming my position.   
We get through the gates and I rush out of the rv as quick as I can and run home. Slamming the door behind me I just stand with my back to the door. It’s not long before I feel the handle moving. I push up against the door so he can’t get in. “Luc what’s wrong. Let me in.” I can hear him getting frustrated and he tries the handle again.   
“Daryl please can I just have a little while on my own.” I hear him move from the door but he doesn’t leave. “Please.” I hear him huff and storm off. I look out the window a watch him head to Ricks. Running up the stairs I pull out some paper and a pen and write down something for Daryl quickly. Hopefully it will be enough to stop him coming and finding me. Grabbing my bag I bung as much as I can in it. The last thing I grab is my favourite shirt of Daryl’s, bringing it to my face I smell it letting out a quiet sob. I put the letter on the kitchen fridge knowing he will see it there and head to the door. I bend down to pick my bow up while taking one look around the ground floor of our house. I don’t want to leave but if he finds out I was here it would be so much worse. He would kill the lot of them just to have me back. I will not allow that to happen.  
Closing the door behind me I run to the back of the house and start climbing the wall. I look back as I make it to the top to take one last look. I see Carl standing at his window. He frowns at me, I shake my head at him and mouth ‘Please. No.’ hoping he gets what I mean. Shimming down on of the supports I take off in a run just in case Carl hasn’t given me a head start. I know exactly where I’m going but it breaks my heart having to say goodbye the way I did.   
‘I will always love you Daryl. I am so sorry please don’t hate me forever.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A shorter one for a change. Enjoy and thank you to all of you reading:)


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry!

Daryl’s pov

 

She left. She has actually left me. I did as she had asked and left her for about half an hour, that was all I could manage and I was pissing everyone off that was in the room.

As I was about to leave Carl came down the stairs. “Dad I think I just saw Lucy climb the wall and jump down. I can’t be sure but she mouthed ‘please no’ at me. I don’t know what she meant.” Before he could say more I pulled the door open and left it to swing on its hinges.

Running over to our home I barge through the door to find the place empty. Running up the stairs I look in every room not finding her. Coming down the stairs I notice a letter on the fridge.

 

_Daryl_

_This seems strange only a month ago you were writing your own letter to me. I want you to know I will forever be yours, there is no-one else for me after you. You are like an epic love that a person only gets once in a lifetime, and I’m the idiot throwing it all away. You may never forgive me for leaving but trust me when I say that everyone is safer if I’m not there. When you said saviour’s my heart broke. He will find me if I stay and I cant have him hurting you. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if you were gone from this world. Stay safe for me please, don’t go looking for trouble. I need you to know I was ready to spend the rest of my life with you. Don’t look for me please, it’s best if I’m not around. I will love you forever_

_Lucy_

 

I slide down the fridge and put my face in my hands and cry quietly. Someone sits next to me and puts their arm around my shoulder.

“What happened?” it was Rick. Of course it was. I saw the look of panic on his face when I flew out of his house. I pass him the letter saying three words through my quiet sobs.

“She’s left me.” I want to break down but I know Rick is going to say we have things to do. I was about to ask if I can sit it out when Rick spoke up.

“What if we get rid of the saviour’s, she’ll be safe then. We can go look for her after brother. Make it safe for when she gets back.” Is he completely ignoring the fact she doesn’t want me to look for her. There must be a reason for that. I get up off the floor moving so quick Rick jumps. I head out of the house, that’s all it is now she’s not here, and head to the armoury. Rick is following me, I grab guns and pass them to him wordlessly. We need to do this even if it is just for the prick up at hilltop.

After we have our plan and have all of the things we need, we move out. It’s dark now but I can’t stop my eyes wandering around the passing woods just hoping to see her there. I don’t see her but I know she’s there.

 

 

Someone has Maggie and Carol and it’s all chaos. These fucking Negan, saviour guys are really starting to fuck me off now. Messing up everything for us, plus any plans I even had to be with Lucy. I shake my head and tie this fucking douche up tight. He grunts as I pull him so he’s sitting up. “Where will they have taken them?” Rick asks and this saviour guy keeps his mouth shut. He nods his head to me and I land a punch in his face.

“Answer me! This is only going to get worse for you.” The guy spits out some blood and smiles up at Rick.

“Like I’m gonna tell you anything. You just killed all of my buddy’s. Might as well get it over with and kill me too. I ain’t telling you nothing.” I punch him again without being prompted and leave him on the ground. I walk up to Rick.

“I thought that guy said this was the only outpost?” I ask him trying to keep calm but I can’t. I could be out there right now looking for Lucy but I’m stuck here in yet another mess that we have to clean up.

“That’s what he said according to Maggie. We need to get this guy in the car and I’ll make him tell us where they are.” Rick can be real scary when he wants to and I’d hate to be the guy up against him in a fight. To think when we first met I hated his guts. Oh how things have changed. He's like the brother I always wanted. I mean Merle was Merle but he wasn’t the best brother.

Going and grabbing my bike back we make our way back to the highway. I have missed my bike and the only thing that would make this better would be to have Lucy on the back holing on to me tight. My heart starts to ache, I shake the thoughts away as I follow the car down the highway hoping we can get the girls back.

 

It didn’t take long for Rick to ‘persuade’ the guy to tell us where Maggie and Carol were. Getting there we find them waiting looking very tired. We take them back to Alexandria so Denise can check them over.

After an hour of being back we take Maggie up to hilltop to get her checked by their baby doctor and report what happened in more detail. Its not that we don't trust Jesus its just he doesn’t know what happened after the deed was done. Pulling up to the gates they open almost immediately and I am shocked to see Lucy stood on the steps with Jesus. She had coloured her hair, removing all of the green I love, and cut in a fringe that falls into her eyes. She looks so different but yet the same. My heart beats faster as she looks over to me. She looks sad and moves away from the house and heading to one of the trailers. I drop my bike not caring if it’s broken and run after her.

Banging on the door she opens it slowly, she has tears in her eyes and quietly sobs when she sees me. “Why are you here Daryl. I told you not to look for me.”

“I didn’ look yet, they all wanted to get Maggie checked over. She and Carol got taken by some of them.” She looks worried at me and starts shaking. I take her hands in mine but she pulls away. “ They’re okay. Glenn wanted to make sure the bub was okay.” I come in the door and close it behind me. I try to reach out for her again but she steps back. “Luc what’s wrong.” She hangs her head down hiding her face in her masses of light brown hair.

“I told you to stay away from trouble and from me and you have done neither.” She looks up and I’ve never seen her so angry. She pushes me up against the door with both of her hands on my shoulders. “Do you know what you have just fucking started. A few guys he will let go, but a whole fucking base. God your all fucking idiots, the lot of you. Leave now Daryl.” She shouts at me but still doesn’t hurt me. She looks deep in my eyes and before I can make to grab her again she steps away.

“Why are ya actin this way Luc. Do ya know these guys.” I try not to shout at her but I can’t help but react that way. She knows them and I need to know why and she will tell me. I push her up against the wall behind. As soon as she hits the wall I put my hands on either side of her waist. She looks up at me but doesn’t struggle. It’s like she want me to hurt her, just waiting for me to react like someone has in her past.

“Yes I know them, I know all of them. You’ll never be able to kill them all, there are just too many.” She blinks and more tears fall. She softens a bit and I have to lean in, struggling to hear her. “Why couldn’t you of just waited a day or two, then I wouldn’t of been here.” I take a deep breath trying to stay calm. She speaks up a bit, making me lean back. “ I suppose you need to know now. But promise me you won’t tell anyone else. You can’t please. I just know Rick will use me to win the fight that is coming.” Pleading with me she takes my hand from her side and holds it. “Please it won’t end well for anyone.”

I nod my head at her and she let’s go of my hand. I’m about to reach to hold it again but she shakes her head. I keep my other hand against the wall keeping her in place. I know if I move it she will run again. She reaches down for my hand gun and puts it in my hand. After taking off the safety she looks into my eyes. “I never told you my name. Well my full name.” I look at her confused when she stops talking. I wait for her to continue. She seems to be gathering the courage to tell me something she really doesn’t want to.

“ My name is Negan” I grab a hold of her throat and tighten slightly. I'm seeing red and start to raise my gun on instinct. “Lucille Negan.” She had put her hands on her abdomen as if the protect it. The world fades from red a bit when I see her do this. I frown at her trying to sort thought so many things in my head.

“So yer the one callin all the shots. Killin and terrorizin innocent people.” I try to control my hand but I can’t, the gun is just pushing on her head now. “ ya’ve been livin in the same place as these people and ya think that’s ok do ya.”

“ I’m not who you think I am. The person your thinking of is my brother. He’s the sick son of a bitch that will anything to get what he wants, including me.” I start to lower my gun but she stops me and puts it back. “No Daryl if he finds out I'm still alive I don’t know what he will make me do. I did so many bad things when I was there with him. I don’t want to be that person again. It might be easier if I was dead.”

Tears flow out of my eyes. I cant do what she’s asking, I need her. I drop the gun in the floor surprising her and pull her in to kiss her. She is still at first but is soon kissing me back pulling me closer. I can hear someone calling my name but I ignore it. I never want to leave, if I do she won’t be here anymore. I don’t know what she will do if I don’t stay. Someone bursts through the door.

“Brother we need to go. Now.” It’s Rick and he sounds urgent.

“I’m not goin with ya!” I turn and say to him and he takes a step back as if I had stabbed him. I ain’t leaving her again. I can’t.

“Daryl go. Please.” Lucy takes my face in her hands and wipes my tears away.

“Come with me” I plead with her but she shakes her head.

“Its safer for you if we are apart. I’ll be here, I promise. Just be safe please.” She whispers as she lets go of me and pushes me towards Rick. “I love you!” That is the last thing I hear her say before I'm being pulled outside. I turn from her unwillingly. I hope she stays. She’s never gone back on her word before.

 

 

The days go on and it gets worse. The worse day for me was when Denise gets killed with my crossbow in front of me. That fucking prick Dwight shot her. I should of killed him as soon as I saw him back in the brunt forest. He stole everything I had. I can’t take anymore and go out to find him. I need to kill him now before he can find more ways to hurt me. I have to keep everyone I love safe. I failed Denise but I won’t fail Lucy.

 

 

Getting caught was not part of my plan and neither was getting shot. I’ve fucked it all up now. Hoping to just bleed to death before I see anyone I care about get hurt. It’s not me I’m worried about it’s Michonne, Rosita and Glenn. They decided to follow me on my hunt for Dwight. I’m pulled out of the back of a van and pushed down onto my knees. I look up and see most of the fighters from Alexandria and look at Rick wondering why they are out here. I look to Maggie and sees she looks worse than I feel. Glenn tries to make his way to her but gets pulled back. There is this guy in the middle of the semi circle, he looks a bit familiar but I can’t quite place him. He asks a question looking at Rick and the whole of his group say one word.

“NEGAN!”

My blood runs cold. This is her brother, the one she is afraid of. I’m busy just staring at the guy when he suddenly hits Abraham, just keeps hitting him until his head is a pile of mush.

I can’t keep my eyes off of what used to be Abrahams head. This guy did that with a smile on his face. I have seen people killing each other since the world turned to shit, but never saw someone that enjoyed it.

I tune back in while he’s busy trying to get Rosita to look at Lucille. What sick fuck names his bat after his sister. I loose my cool when he shouts at her. No one should talk to a woman like that. Jumping up I land a punch on his jaw and struggle against the people holding me back. They pin me to the floor and Dwight comes over pointing my fucking crossbow at me. I really should of killed him when I had the chance.

“You want me to do it, right here. Now?” he’s asking permission to kill me. Negan grabs my hair and pulls my head back to look at me.

“No. Na you don’t kill that. Not until you try it a little.” They drag me back to the line. I hang my head down waiting for what’s to come next. It come all to soon and I hear Maggie cry out loudly. Looking up I can see that Glenn was the chosen one.

When Negan see her face he actually shows some remorse but then continues to hit him. I hate him even more with every blow. Once he finishes he speaks up.

“Lucille is thirsty. Heh. She is a vampire bat!”

There he goes again calling his bat by his sister’s name. I am so glad she isn’t here right now. He drags Rick into the rv and drives off, not coming back for along time.

 

 

We are left there for almost an hour before I hear the rv returning. Dragging Rick out and throwing him on the ground as if he was a rag doll.

More shit happens that I don’t even want to think about. Next thing I know is I’m being draged to the van and thrown in the back. I have one last thought before I’m plunged into darkness.

‘Lucy run. Run for you life!’

 

 

It feels like weeks since I was locked in this dark damp room even though it had only been a few days. The same song playing on repeat stopping me from sleeping. The only food I get is dog food sandwiches. My clothes have been taken away and every time that door opens its humiliating. Every time it’s Dwight though throwing me food. I had been counting the amount of times he feeds me, it’s the only way to tell how much time really goes by. It took all of my strength not to think of the 5'6” girl I would rather be with right now. Wishing I could hold her, hell I would of settled for a picture just to see her one more time. I feel like I’m going to die here and the thought of her being alone in the world broke my heart.

 

He fed me eight times before the door opened showing someone I didn’t expect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry for what I did in the last chapter. But alot of bad has to happen before we get to the good. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone that has left kudos and comments. :) 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed. Until next time :)


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a long chapter. I did try to cut it but couldn't find a good place to. Enjoy:)

Lucy’s pov

 

I was working with some of the guys in the field when Gregory came over to me. “What are you doing back here. I didn’t tell your little friends I knew you. Maybe you should thank me.” This fucking bastard does give up does he. The first time I got here he made a move on me. I refused every time coming up with any excuse I could think of. In the end he tried to force him self on me while I was sleeping. I remember it all to clearly. I smile at him before I say anything.

“Why Gregory you didn’t say I couldn’t come back. Why, want to try something again. I might just do what I threaded this time if you do.” He steps away from me. At lest I know he remembers. It was the night he kicked me out. Jesus is the only reason he is still alive, that and the girly scream he let out. Just thinking about it makes me want to laugh.

 

 

‘He came into my room late at night and climbed on top of me waking me up. “You can’t say no forever you know. You’ll have to give in eventually even if I have to keep you locked up here for the rest of your life.” He bends down to my neck and starts kissing me, undoing the buttons on my shirt and moving the fabric out of the way so he can fondle my breasts. I reach under my pillow so slowly he doesn’t even notice. Pulling out my knife I watch as it glistens in the moonlight. Lowering both of my hands making out that I’m enjoying what he’s doing. I grab a hold of his pathetic excuse of a dick and move my knife to the base of it. “Get the fuck off me before I render your little, and I mean little, friend useless.” He try’s to strangle me into submission but I lift my knife a little just cutting into the flesh. He screams and let’s go of me and rushes to the other side of the room as Jesus crashes into the room. I don’t even bother to cover myself I just sit there wiping my blade clean of the blood. “Get her the fuck out of here now. She attacked me.” He leaves the room after mumbling that he needs to see the doctor. Jesus comes over to me and sits on the bed. He lift the covers to conceal my breasts. “Where will you go.” I look at him frowning. “Look you know none of us like him in charge but I can’t do it and neither can any of them. I can’t over rule him on this.” I sigh as I get up starting to get dressed and pack. I shrug my shoulders. “Maybe I can find a boat and make my way back to England. Maybe that will be far enough away. I can’t stay this close to Negan Jesus. I am so grateful you have helped me but maybe it is time to move on and get as far away from my brother as I can get.” Jesus was the only one that knew about me back then. He was the one who found me cold, alone and practically ferial. He brought me around bringing me food and water to start with. Then clothes and blankets before bringing me here. I don’t think he ever expected Gregory to become obsessed with me. Most men did but Jesus didn’t and that is why I trusted him. He was the first man before Daryl to treat me like a person not just a play thing. “How about I help you find a place to stay until you decide what to do.” He offered like it was nothing, like he didn’t have responsibilities to the people here. “No, I’ll be fine. Let’s just say goodbye and hope I never have to come back yeah.” I smile at him. I didn’t know at the time that I would come back many time. He had been the first friend I had since the turn. Yes I was lonely before but I was used to that. Meeting him changed me. I knew I needed to try and survive more like a human not an animal.’

 

Thinking back on those times I wish I had been able to stay longer. I had really liked being here. If only Gregory hadn’t ruined it for me. I call out to his retreating form. “Bye Gregory, hope you have a wonderful day.” As I silently laugh Jesus come up beside me. I look up and smile, standing up I dust myself off.

“What would you like help with today then?” So far every day he has taken me aside to ask me questions. At first it was about the people back in Alexandria but he noticed that it hurt me too much. He soon moved onto the sanctuary. How many people were there before I left, ways to get in. All of that lovely stuff that only I would know. The only thing he didn’t ask was to draw a map of the place.

“Well today I thought we could go for a walk outside.” He smiles down at me taking me by the arm and dragging me to the trailer.

“Well we are already outside.” I say back at him even thought I know exactly what he means. I know today is the day the saviour’s come for their ‘tribute’. Nice to know thing hadn’t changed under my brothers rule. Take from others by threatening their lives. We walking in and I grab my bow while he grabs his knives.

“Well go east today and see if we can find a few places to scavenge for a few hours and be back once they have left.” I nod at him and start to head outside. I see the gates open and I run round to the back of the trailer as Jesus closes the door and heads to the gate. Shit.

Oh shit I can’t remember any of the ways out of here. Jesus always helped back out but always at night. I only know where they are from the outside. The nights I would come here were my low nights while I was on my own and I needed some human contact. We never slept together I would just need him to hold me and remind me I was human. Jesus acts like how my own brother should of. Kind and caring while still being harsh with me if I need it.

I walk round the outside of the wall till I find something familiar, it’s the pile of logs I sat on after I sang to Daryl. It’s making my heart hurt to look at them but as I look closer I see a line where there shouldn’t be one. I go over to see if I can lift it. It moves easily, finally I had found my way out and away. Running to the trees I only stop when I reach a bush. Looking back I see Jesus being guided back in by Dwight. Well shit, it looks like I will be by myself for a few hours.

 

I come across a big tree with lots of cover and climb it. Getting to a branch high enough to hold my weigh I perch myself on it and wait. I stare out at all of the green around me and think of back when I first met Daryl and when we went hunting. Starting from there I ran thought every interaction and word that passed between us. I smile for most of it but when I reach the past week my heart aches. I miss him so much. I don’t know if we will ever be able to be with each other again. I rub my stomach absentmindedly. God I wish he was here right now. I need comfort only he can give me. What I wouldn’t give to be back in his arms.

 

 

I let the sky pass over half the sky before making my way back to hilltop. I look to see if the trucks are still there before climbing back through the hole where I escaped. Jesus is waiting the other side and helps me through. “You remembered where it was then.” He smiles at me but it doesn’t reach his eyes. Looking up at him I frown.

“Yes just about. What happened?” I know he would never lie to me and that all I need to do is ask him and he will tell me.

“Negan thinks it was us that ordered the attack on the outpost. They are now demanding more from us. We really need to do something about them all.” I wince at his words knowing he’s trying to be careful with what he says but I hear the meaning behind them. “I’m sorry Lucy but it needs to happen, everyone is suffering because if him.”

“I know, I do, but you can’t expect me to go back. What sneak in, go to Negan's room and kill him while he’s sleeping. Even if I could kill my own brother there will always be another to take his place. Trust me when i say this, he is the lesser of two evils and you know it.” I keep my head hidden from him when I say this, feeling bad for caring too much for the only blood family I have left and being able to ignore what he is doing.

“Come on Lucy, let’s go have dinner and we can talk about something else. Like maybe what you found today.” He puts a finger under my chin and makes me look at him.

“Hmmmm well about that. I kinda just sat up a tree all day. Sorry.” He looks at me for a second more and just bursts out laughing.

“ Lucy what am I going to do with you.” He continues to laugh at me all the way back to the trailer.

 

It was dark now and I was just coming off of watch duty. I felt bad for not scavenging earlier so I offered to take Jesus's watch on the wall. As I walk back to the trailer I was sharing with him I hear a car coming. I stand to the side as a pickup comes up the path and two women get out of the cab. Squinting to see I recognise Maggie and run to her before she can fall. Sasha comes over and helps me take her to the doctor. We leave her inside and Jesus runs over.

“What happened?” he asks as I notice two rapped bodies in the bed of the truck. I stop as soon as I see them, not needing to know what had happened or who they were. I take a deep breath and get in the truck and move it to the back of the house. Getting out I find a shovel and start digging. I jump when another shovel hits the ground a little to my left. Sasha and I continue silently until the holes are big enough. Helping one another we get them down and into their resting places. Covering it back with earth Jesus comes up to us with two small crosses and some blue wild flowers. Placing them at the head of each grave we sit down.

We sat like that for awhile before Sasha surprises me by resting her head in my lap. I place my hand on her shoulder, soon I hear her breathing softly. I stare at the graves with hundreds of images of Abraham and Glenn running through my mind.

 

It’s is just before day break that I think of my brother. I unintentionally growl waking Sasha up. She sits up and give me a small smile before standing up. She doesn’t need to say anything to me. I know what she was feeling at that moment she rested her head in my lap. How many times had I done the same with Jesus.

I get up when I hear someone coming round the corner and back up so they can get passed. I watch as Maggie places Glenn’s watch on his grave. After awhile I silently excuse myself feeling like I’m interrupting a moment that should be shared between them.

Getting to the trailer I let myself in and collapse on the sofa falling into a nightmare filled sleep. I wake up hearing people talking quietly. I keep my eyes shut so I don’t interrupt them.

 

 

 

“If what you say is true then she is the only one that can get him out.” I hear Maggie say and my heart beats faster. What is going on. Do I even want to know. I hear someone move somewhere close to where I am. I feel lime I’m being watched but keep as still as I can.

“She’s not ready for that. She told me herself. It will hurt her to know and she’s been through so much already.” Jesus says, his voice is the loudest so I know he is the one next to me.

“Haven’t we all. I get what your saying but she needs to make this decision for herself. You can’t keep trying to protect her. She will find out eventually and then how do you think she will feel.” Sasha says, I can tell she angry but I know it’s not with Jesus.

“Telling her that Daryl is being held prisoner by her brother is not going to help her at all.” I drown out everything else they say concentrating on keeping my breathing level and trying to ignore the pain in my chest. He has Daryl. I know exactly why he chose him out of all of them. Daryl looks like the one that is most likely to work for him at the top. Getting him to do all of the dirty work. I bet in the same way I did to Simon.

I hear them leave and wait until the door closes and I can’t hear anyone around. I sit up and put my head in my hands. I need to come up with a plan to get Daryl out of there. I can’t let my brother change him into one of his mindless hitmen. Getting up slowly I check the time. It’s two pm now if I wait till it’s dark it will be easier for me to sneak out. Grabbing a bag I put some food and water in it and check over my bow. I scan the room looking for anything else I might need and my eyes fall on Daryl’s gun that I kicked under the sofa. Bending down to get it I hear someone come in.

“How long have you been up sleeping beauty.” Jesus says behind me. I stand and hide the gun as best as I can without him seeing it.

“ Not long, just woke up about 5 minutes ago and forgot I was on the sofa.” He laughs at me and moves to the fridge grabbing a bottle of water. “You heading out today?” I ask him this question everyday but I can’t control the slight hope I have in my voice. He frowns at me and shakes his head.

“No not today Gregory want me to help around here.” He heads to the door. “Are you coming with?”

“Na, not today I’m pretty tired after last night to be honest.” I move my shoulder around hearing them click loudly. He frowns at me again but eventually shrugs his shoulders.

“Okay, but if you want some company you know where to find me.” I nod at him and he finally leaves me on my own.

 

 

I sit outside and wait till dark solidifying the plan in my head, going over every detail twice. The wait is killing me. I just want to go now but I have to wait. I have already hidden my stuff near the escape hatch, and watch the sky turning dark. I look to see if anyone was around before making my way towards the back of the trailer. Putting my things on I hear someone move behind me. Turning round I see Jesus and Sasha. He look upset with me but Sasha is smiling.

“Where are you going. Were you just going to sneak out without letting anyone know where your going.” Jesus says as he steps forward with his hand outstretched.

“Of course she was. She wasn’t asleep earlier when we were talking. She know Jesus, now just let her go do what only she can do.” Sasha doesn’t stop looking at me. We had never got on before but in this moment I could hug her. I would of thought it was Jesus would know I was awake but apparently not. I tug my bag tighter on my shoulders before turning my back to them, lifting the hatch up. Sasha hand hold it open for me to climb through.

“Thank you.” I say to her and I look over to Jesus. “I will do what I have to. Just be here to bring me back from it all if I need it.” He nods his head at me before turning away.

“Don’t I always.” It hurts me to hear the sadness in his voice. He didn’t argue with me for once, he must know I have to do this. I reach the hole outside of the wall and run to the trees hoping the guards don’t see me. I’m making my way to a place I never wanted to go back to. Remembering the way as if I had only made it yesterday. It will take me a day to get there from here unless I can find a working car.

 

 

 

I look at the factory while in cover from one of the nearby buildings. It still looks the same except there seems to be less walkers tied to the fence. I pull a face from my past I had hoped would stay there and make my way down the road. I stay in full view hoping one of my old crew see me. I get to the gate and just stand there not caring about the walkers trying to get to me on either side. I bash on a pole three time with the butt of my knife before someone comes out.

“State your business or move along.” It’s a woman I don’t recognise. God she looks rough, like she’s not even being fed properly. I purposefully give her a look up and down with sneer on my face. She takes a step back and starts to raise her gun.

“Let her in you fool.” I look up and see Simon smiling at me. I was always fond of him, after all I made him the way he is. With some regret I wish I had kept some of that caring side of him, but I can’t change that now. The woman still stands there looking at each of us in turn. “I said fucking let her in, what are you deaf now.” He says this while pushing her away rather hard and opens the gate himself. I make my way into the courtyard and look around before lifting my hand to his cheek.

“Still the same I see. You look good my sweet. Anything good happen after I left.” He bends his head down now refusing to look me in the eye. When I was here I had complete control over some of the guards assigned to me by Negan. He never knew this until I was gone though.

“Why did you come back Miss Negan.” He looks up quickly at me. “Not that we didn’t miss you.” He cowers slightly and I feel bad . Was I really that bad. Of course I was and worse. I had ruined this man, when I saw him with that woman and he just pushed her aside like a dirty rag I knew I had. He would of never done that before I had locked him in that cell. I lift his head so I can look at his face.

“I need to see Negan. He has something that is mine.” I watch him flinch at my words but nods his head. Turning from me he stands tall again and leads me in through the main door.

“Wait here Miss Negan and I will get him for you.” He points at the rail that looks over the main room that is busy with activity. Looking down I see that there are triple the people here compared to last year. I feel sadness for the people down there. Theirs is not a life anyone would want to live. Working themselves to the bone just for scraps by the looks of it.

“Ahh dear sister. Have you decided to return to us?” I turn and see him behind me. Smiling as he walks towards me. He hands his bat off to Simon and he just stands there and holds it pointing down smiling at me. He plays with the end of my hair. “You coloured your hair!” he says but he know why I did it. Negan pulls me in for a hug and holds me tight. To say I haven’t missed my big brother would be a lie. He’s the only family I had left before Daryl came into my life.

“No. I haven’t. You have someone of mine, and I want him back.” He pulls away from me. I know I have just let it known that I am with Alexandria and he frowns at me.

“You would chosen them over family. Well, we have changed haven't we.” I see Simon flinch and hands the bat back to Negan. He steps away and makes his way down the stairs. Negan gestures towards the door to the steps that head to the other parts of the building. Walking In front of him I take the stairs down to the basement knowing that he has Daryl locked down there. Once we are alone he turns me around to face him.

“ You know I can’t just hand him over. Everything here has been slowly crumbling away since you left.”

“Don’t put that on me. I left because I couldn’t take your demandingness anymore. I was you sister not a fucking slave for you to order around. When we started this, yes I was in charge but we worked as a team. You were the one that pushed me to do what I did. You let the power get to your head.” I look up at him and see that his face softens a bit.

“Well just as feisty as ever I see.”

“Don’t fucking start with me James.” He smiles at my when I use his first name.

“I haven’t heard anyone call me that all year. I have missed you Lucille. More than you can ever imagine.” He pulls me in for a hug again but i stop him.

“Please just let him go.” I begin to plead with him but he shakes his head and looks down at me, his face hardening.

“No. He is that fucking prick Rick’s little attack dog. I will change him and turn him on his own people. I will make him want to work for me.” I look at him and see the loathing in his eyes for Rick.

“You know there are plenty of ways to get what you want without hurting people, don’t you.” I lift my hand to his cheek and he softens a bit. “I regret a lot of the stuff I did while I was here. Taking the wrong road to get what I wanted. Why do you think I handed the power to you. I couldn’t take hurting that many people anymore, and after when you made me do those thing I just had to get out before I forgot who I was completely. You’ve always been different from everyone James. You said it yourself you belong in the world. I do to just not in the way you do.” He looks sad and hurt. “You know I don’t say these things to be mean but I do need you to see it from my point of view. People are more likely to be more productive if you use a bit of kindness.” He shakes his head as if deciding something.

“You can’t have him. That’s final.” I have to hold back my tears. Closing my eyes I try one last thing.

“Can I see him then. Just for a little while. Please.” I look back at him and he frowns at me. “I will need you to change the song too. I don’t want that fucking song on while I’m in there.” He smiles and nods his head.

“What would you prefer.” He guides me down the hall to the media room. It had been my favourite room in the whole factory. I came down here whenever I had the time. Moving my finger along the cds I pick one up and hand it to him.

“Track 11. I will only be in the room for the duration of the song so please start it a minute after the door closes.” He looks as if he’s going to say something. I harden my face and stand in front of him pulling myself up as high as my height will allow. “You will leave me in the room alone with him. You owe me that. Lock the door behind me if you have to.” I turn and head to the cell not caring if he follows.

I see Dwight standing beside the door with key in one hand and a cloth in the other. “Nice to see you again Lucy. Been awhile.” I nod my head at him and stare at the door waiting for him to open it.

“Let her in.” I hear Negan shout from down the hall. Dwight passes me the cloth. I try to keep my face the same as it has been since I got here. The door opens as that fucking song stops and I walk in.

I see him cowering in the corner and my heart breaks for him. I wait until the door closes and locks behind me before I rush up to him. He tries to push himself into the wall. I turn his head so he’s looking at me. Wiping, what I call my sanctuary face, off and look at his eyes. “I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.” I say to him as I pass the cloth over to him. He grabs it out of my hand and starts to run it over his body.

“What are ya doin here Lucy. Ya said yerself, ya can’t be here.” His voice is so different to how it usually is. So cold. It’s at that point the song that I had chosen comes on.

“Just listen please. Music has always been the way I express myself best.”

 

_Love like a storm, like an ocean, endless_

_Love like a fire, like the world is burning_

_Should’ve known better,_ _should’ve known better_

_But you see through all the lines and then_

_Prove I’m not like all of them_

_Should’ve known better, should’ve known better_

_(ahh, ahh)_

 

_If your love is just a dream, don’t wake me up_

_It’s hard enough to face the world alone_

_If your love is just a dream, don’t wake me up_

_It’s hard enough to face the world alone_

 

_You are the one I waited for, I knew it all along_

_(Knew it all along)_

_You are the one I’m fighting for, I knew it all along_

 

_Love like a dream, like you’re never waking_

_Love like your last, like the sky is falling_

_Should’ve known better, should’ve known better_

_But you see through all the lines and then_

_Prove I’m not like all of them_

_Should’ve known better, should’ve known better_

_(Ooo, ahh)_

 

_You are the one I waited for, I knew it all along_

_(Knew it all along)_

_You are the one I’m fighting for, I knew it all along_

 

I take his head in my hands making him look at me. Tears have started spilling out of my eyes. I can see that his have glazed over.

 

_Sing me something_

_that’ll bring me to my knees That’ll put my mind at ease_

_Please tell me anything_

_We can build this like a dream_

_Let’s make believe, just you and me_

_Sing me something_

_that’ll bring me to my knees_

_That’ll put my mind at ease_

_Please tell me anything_

_We can build this like a dream_

_Let’s make believe, just you and me_

 

I decide to join in with the song from this moment on feeling it will get my feeling across to him more.

 

_If your love is like a dream, don’t wake me up_

_It’s hard enough to face the world alone_

_If this love is just a dream, don’t wake me up_

_It’s hard enough to face the world alone_

 

_If your heart stops beating, God rest my soul_

_Dig this grave for two, can’t live without you_

_It’s hard enough to face the world alone_

_If your heart stops beating, God rest my soul_

_Dig this grave for two, can’t live without you_

_It’s hard enough to face the world alone_

 

_You are the one I waited for, I knew it all along_.

 

 

He sits up and pulls me in and wraps his arms around me tightly. He whispers in my ear so no-one can hear. “Leave and don’ come back. Please don’ come back for me.” I pull my head back to look at him frowning. His eyes plead with me. As the door opens behind me I nod and get up.

“Did you get what you needed.” Negan asks me looking in the room frowning at Daryl. I can see on his face he knows that something has happened in the past with us. I have to say something and I hope it doesn’t hurt Daryl too much.

“Yeah I did. Fucking keep him. No use to me anymore, you’ve broken the part of him that I wanted.” I walk down the hall trying my hardest not to look back, my heart breaking with every step. I hear Negan's footsteps following me.

“Will you stay. Please we need you back. Plus I don’t like us being on opposite sides.” He says as we reach outside near the gate.

“ No. I won’t.” I look out at the fence. “My place is out there now. I don’t belong here anymore.”

“Will you go back to Alexandria?” He’s only asking to know if he will have to deal with me in the coming fight that we both know is going to happen.

“No I don’t think so. I think I need to be on my own.” I’m lying to him but I need to. He can’t know what I have planned. He will pay for fucking with the people I care about.

 

 

After we had talked for awhile he gave me a car and a few supplies and saw me off. “You know your welcome back when ever you want. I still have your room set up how you left it. I had always hoped you would come back.” I look at him when he says it and see his eyes have misted over.

“I’ll think about it.” Taking his hand in mine I give it a squeeze and let go. Putting the car in drive, I move down the road and turn away from the sanctuary and my brother hoping this won’t come to a fight.

 

 

I make my way back to hilltop ditching the car a few miles away. I make sure to hide it well knowing now that he has seen me they will look for it. I get to the gate and wait for it to open. Feeling defeated, I end up on the floor as my legs give out on me. I hang my head down and silently cry. The gate opens and someone lifts me up.

“Shit Lucy what happened.”

“Are you ok.”

“Where’s Daryl.”

“I think we should let her rest.” Jesus’s voice is the last one I hear before I black out. I wake up in my old room in the big house. Confused for a second as to if the past year had even happen. I see someone move in the corner and I try to grab for my knife under my pillow.

“Its not there Lucy.” I look over and see that it was Jesus in the corner. Maggie is sat at the end of the bed, Sasha is over near the door looking pissed off.

“What wrong with you Sasha.” She turns her head to look at me.

“You didn’t kill him did you. Bet you didn’t even bother trying.”

“That’s enough Sasha. We don’t know what happened.” Jesus says her way while still looking at me. Sasha opens the door and slams it closed on her way out. Maggie takes my hand making me look at her. She looks concerned.

“Lucy do you think you can tell us what happened. You’ve been sleeping for 2 days. We were so worried that we had doctor Carson have a look at you.” I look down at the bed and pick at the blanket that is covering me.

“He wouldn’t let me take him. There was nothing I could do.” I look over at Jesus startling him when I jump out of the bed and grab hold of his arm. “Please you have to get him out of there. I’ll draw you a map and get you anything you need. He’s going to make him into an animal built to attack on command.” I fall to my knees and look at the floor. I have never had to beg for something so much in my life. “Please.” I whisper as Maggie comes over and helps me back into bed.

She sits beside me and strokes my hair until I fall asleep again.

 

 

I wake with a start. There is someone outside the door. Getting up I hide under the bed. I will have to stay here until someone gets me and let’s me know I’m safe. This is why I hate staying in the house, it’s not just the memory’s. It’s the fact I’m not free to run if I have to. I can hear the trucks outside starting to move out. It’s at that point I wonder who is on the bed. I can see Daryl’s gun just to my side and I grab it. Shuffling over to the other side of the bed I start to get up slowly.

“You really going to shoot me.” Sasha says

“What are you doing in here.” I say back with just as much venom. “Why didn't you say it was you.”

“Needed a place to hide. That and both Maggie and Jesus said I should apologise. I’m not going to you know. I hate that man with everything in my body, and I’m angry at you for not stepping up and stopping all of this.”

“I heard that you had a brother that died not that long ago. Could you of really killed him even if everyone around you thought he was the biggest asshole on the planet. Trust me when I say there are worse out there than him.” I turn my back on her and grab all of my stuff. She gets up and picks up one of my bags.

“Come on then Lucy let’s go get you a new place to stay. We’re having to stay with Jesus and its really tight quarters in there now Enid is here too. He also said you won’t want to stay in the house.” She has calmed down some and her face has relaxed from that permanent frown she has.

“There is a trailer just behind the wall. No-one uses it cause it has a leaky roof.” I roll my eyes as I say it and move down the stairs and out the back.

 

 

Getting to the trailer I find that there is some damp damage but it will do for now. Leaving the door open and pushing all of the windows open as wide as they will go I sit down.

“Well I’ll leave you to it then. Maybe we’ll see you for dinner.” She trying to be nice.

“Yeah maybe.” I watch her go back to the gate and think of everything that happened. There is nothing I can do to get Daryl out now. I could of just stayed but I saw the way James looked at us. He would of used me to get in Daryl’s head anyway he could. I look up at the ceiling and see a few holes. Getting up I decide to just fix what I can fix and leave the rest till late.

 

 

It’s dinner time before I know it and all of the holes have been fixed. I grab I knife and make my way round to the gate. Might as well go eat and find out what the saviour’s had wanted. Twice in one week is unheard of. Maybe thing are really falling apart at the sanctuary.

I get to the gate and see Rick walking up to it. Trying to hide but failing, Carl sees me. “Dad.” He says as he points to me. Rick waves me over. As I make my way over to the gate it opens and they all walk in. Following behind them I see Rick rush off to his right. Frowning I pass the wall to see for myself. Maggie is smiling at me and looks over at Rick just as I do. I let out a sob at the sight before me.

Daryl is here. He’s safe. He got away. Jesus comes over and takes my arm pulling me towards them. I stop a few feet away remembering the last things I said to Daryl and look at the ground. I was so harsh. I should just leave. I feel someone’s fingers under my chin, tying to lift me head up, but I don’t want to look. I can’t, I hurt him. He deserves so much better.

“Will ya just look at me ya stubborn woman!” I lift my head so quickly at that, i feel my neck click. He’s smiling at me. I frown back at him. He grabs me around my waist, keeping one of his hands under my chin, pulling me close. He leans down and kisses me. I feel like I’m floating as my entire body tingles at this simple act. Everyone moves away from us and leave us to it. “I missed ya Luc.” It’s at that I start to cry big fat tears. I bury my head into his shoulder as he holds me. I could almost forget the world, being here like this with him. But it never stays that way, it’s always never long enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song   
> Open water - blessthefall


	13. Chapter 13

Lucy’s pov

Everyone has gathered in Gregory study trying to get him to fight with them against James. I actually think he is more scared of Negan than he is of me. Maybe I should just get rid of this pathetic excuse of a human being and then we can all get on with what needs to be done. I smirk at my thought and Daryl looks at me strangely. I shake my head at him letting him know that I can’t say what I’m thinking. Shrugging he turns back to the conversation. 

 

It ended up being pointless. Gregory won’t do anything if it means he won’t survive. I walk hand in hand with Daryl down to the gate to see the others off. Rick and Jesus are talking about Ezekiel, wow talk about a place I am not welcome at. I do miss the tiger though, she’s such a beautiful animal. I smile wishing I could go with them but I can’t. I really did a number on the kingdom. Daryl starts to pull me with him.  
“Daryl, I can’t go with you.” He stops pulling and turns around.  
“Why the hell not. I just got back to ya. Ya've got to come with us.” I shake my head.  
“I can’t, I’m not welcome there. I’ll have to explain another day.” He try’s one more time to get me to go with him but I don’t budge. We say goodbye quickly and I watch them all get in the car.  
“Why didn’t you go with them.” It was Maggie.  
“I can’t my brother wasn’t always the one in control of the sanctuary. The kingdom was one of my places and let just say I am never allowed behind there walls ever again.” She looks at me for a long time. I can see her going through every interaction we have ever had together trying to see if I’m like this person I’m describing.  
“Come let’s go talk. You sound like you need it. I’m still on watch so why don’t you come up with me.” I walk with her up to the guard platform and sit on the edge looking down. I don’t say anything for along time and she doesn’t force me to say anything, just waiting until I’m ready.  
“ When the turn happened I was staying with my brother, James, looking for my own place. We managed to escape the city but only just. We were on the road for about a month before some people found us. Taking us in they took us to what is now the sanctuary. These people separated us in to our sexes and lock us away. They didn’t know we were brother and sister so every night they would drag us out and one guy would rape me making James watch. This happened for weeks, with different guys, until one of them asked him if he still wanted me now I was rotten goods. I could see anger in his eyes but they couldn’t. They also didn’t see him slid a small piece of glass my way. They didn’t know that we didn’t have to talk to know what the other was thinking. Our mum used to joke, every time they visited me, that we were like twins 15 years apart.” I stop only for a moment thinking of how our relationship used to be and how this is the brother I miss, not the one that is alive now. “ After they didn’t get the reaction out of him they wanted they turned to me. They ripped my clothes from my body and started to climb on top of me.” I take another break to calm my nerves.  
“You don’t have to tell me all of this if you don’t want to.” Maggie says as she looks down at me concerned.  
“No I have to. I know he’s a bad guy now but he never used to be. I need just one person to try and see it from my point of view. Even if its the person that wants him dead the most.” I wait for her to nod before I continue. “ As they raped me I saw my brother move an inch towards me letting me know it was time. I gripped the glass with my hand and as hard as I could pushed it through the guys neck. Covered in blood I crawled out from under him and reached for his bat. I killed almost every single one of them that night.” I can see her looking at me from the corner of my eye. Is that worry I see. “James only killed those that got too close to me. When all if those that had owned the place were dead James came over and covered me in a blanket. It was at that point I refused to be used anymore. My husband used to and then in a new world more men were doing the same. I'd had enough and I took charge the only way knew how. By using everyone’s fears against them. We stayed like that for along time, me in charge of everything even my brother for the most part. Believe it or not sometimes he had to talk me out of things. It was around 18 months ago that something changed in me. I watched as this woman bent down in front of me holding on to her child asking me not to hurt them. One of my men grabbed her and punched her in the stomach, only just missing the child, and threw her away from me. That was when I stepped down and gave James the bat. Yes its the same bat I killed all of those people with. James gained control and became Negan. He began making me do the things I didn’t want to anymore and kept guards around me at all times. The only reason I managed to escape was because he chose the wrong ones, they were more loyal to me than him. I ran away before he could turn me back into the mindless killer I was before.” Taking another little break I waited to see if Maggie wanted to hear more.  
“Then you met Jesus, yes?” I smile up at her.  
“Yes I did. God I almost killed him. I was running away from being turned into more of a killer but I became an animal instead. Jesus managed to get through to me though. I was only here for a week but I became very good friends with him. Even after I got kicked out I kept returning to the only friend I had. It had ended up a twice a week occurrence. Aaron ended up finding me eventually, I was just hiding up a tree waiting until I could head back here. You know everything else from then on.” I take a deep breath feeling a bit lighter. Jesus only knows the stuff from when James turned into Negan, none of the rest of it. Maggie bends down to me and lifts my head up so I look at her.  
“I think anyone who was in your position would break down or try and end their life. Yes what you ended up doing may of been a bit extreme but you came back from it. Didn’t you?” The last bit sounds like a question and not a rhetorical one either.  
“I have but only truly since Daryl came along. It fucking ridiculous that a man I didn’t even know reminded me of the person I used to be and has helped me get back to her.” She nods her head at me in understanding. “I know your feelings towards Negan but please don’t ask me to do something that you know I won’t be able to do.”  
“Did you know I had a sister. She was the one I told you about that we had lost, that still had Daryl shook up.” I nod my head slightly with a frown on my face. “ I understand that you feel like you need to protect your brother but I can not forgive him for what he has done. Ever! I won’t ask you to kill him and by the sounds of it you may not even be able to talk him around. Maybe it would be best if you stay out of it. Just until you feel ready.” I think this is why I chose Maggie to talk to. She is going through shit but yet she still feels bad for others. I watch her yawn.  
“Why don’t you go take a nap and I’ll stay here and keep watch until the next shift.” She nods her head and squeezes my arm as a thank you. 

 

A few hours later I see the car coming back up the road. I call down for them to open the gate and watch as the car comes through. Only Jesus gets out. I frown at him as he goes to his trailer. Stuck here I wait till Andy taps me on the shoulder. He must be the next on watch. Climbing down I look over at the trailer but instead decide to head to my own. Pulling open the gate just enough so I can get through I pull it behind me and walk round. Getting inside I lay on the floor looking up at the patchwork ceiling.  
‘They must of decided Daryl was safer at the kingdom seeing as the saviour’s are not allowed in anymore.’ I pull a blanket over me and hold my knife close and fall into a fitful sleep.

 

The days go past and all I can do is wait for something to happen. I’m making my way up to the house when Jesus calls me over.  
“I haven’t seen you around. I thought you had left.”  
“Nope I’m now in the trailer outside. It was the only one left.” I shrug my shoulders at him not really knowing what to say. “I’m sorry for leaving that night. I shouldn’t of gone. I just needed to try, you know.”  
“When I saw how you were after you got back I knew what I had to do. You asked me before you left to bring you back if I needed to. You never had to beg me to get Daryl, I had already made a plan to get him for you. I knew you needed him.” I look up at him then feeling a bit angry.  
“But you still told them about the kingdom knowing Daryl would go and that I can’t.” He steps back at my words. “I get why you did it but why didn’t he come back with you?”  
“Rick told him to stay and he did. I don’t know what was said between them but it must of been something big for him to stay.”  
‘Hmmm yeah ok or he just doesn’t feel the same way about you anymore you stupid little bitch’ my thoughts interrupt him. I turn and head for the basement to get on and stock take. No-one comes in to bothers me and I don’t leave until I’m done. 

 

Climbing up the steps I smell that someone is having a bbq. The food smells so good I’m almost tempted to go over there. I carry on towards the gate and ask to be let out. I walk out and feel like someone is watching me. Not feeling in the mood for any conversation I hurry to my trailer. I get in and just as I’m about to close the door someone speaks.  
“Can I stay with ya tonight Luc.” I turn around and see Daryl looking at me with his lips turned up slightly. I open the door wider and he makes his way in looking around as he goes. “Why ain’ ya inside with the others?”  
“Because I was in with Jesus and he doesn’t have the room anymore. Tight quarters and all that.” He closes the door and I feel like I’m in a crowded room even though it just the two of us. “ I thought you were still at the kingdom.”  
“Na. I left. It’s not where I wanna be.” He steps closer to me. I feel like I’m on fire with him here. For the first time in weeks we are by ourselves without anyone around. I look down at the floor not wanting to see his eyes. I had just thought maybe he blames me for what has happened. If I look in his eyes all I will feel is guilt for what my brother has done. “Luc look at me.” I just can’t, why can’t he see what I see and how this is all my fault. “ Do ya think I blame ya for everythin that has happened?” I nod my head and press myself up against the wall looking at his feet in front of me. I can feel the heat radiating off of him and it makes me want to touch him. “The only thing I blame ya for is leavin me in the first place.” I look up at him then.  
“You only blame me for leaving. Just that. Not warning you about Negan when I heard his name going around Alexandria. For not stopping this before they died for what I can only say is his sick amusement.” He takes a step back realising how angry at myself I really am. “ I should of just killed myself before. Before any of this happened. But do you know why I didn’t. Cause he stopped me. That’s the real reason I was living here before the turn. He dragged me here to put me on fucking suicide watch. He was a kind and gentle guy before I changed him.” I step forward to go to the door. He’s looking at me the same way Jesus had when he found me. “ Yes Daryl me. I changed him into what he is now.” I storm out of the trailer and into the woods. I hear him running up behind me. For once iI hear him and move just before he can grab me. “ Why are you here Daryl. They can’t enter the kingdom. Your safer there. I told you to stop running off into trouble. Why can’t you listen to me.” I push him away from me and he just catches himself before he trips on a fallen log. “ Why can you not think of yourself for once.” I sink down onto my knees and submit myself to him. I had hurt him. I deserved to be punished. I lower my head and look at my palms rested on my legs.  
“Lucy what are ya doin.” He tugs on my arm trying to get me up off the ground. That’s not the rules. I stay and wait to be told what to do. That’s the main rule. “ Lucy please it’ not safe.” He try’s again, why isn’t he doing what he usually does. “Lucy get up of the fuckin ground!” I stand up mechanical. Finally he gave me something to do. He try’s to turn my face to look at him but I can’t. “Look at me, now.” I look at him, but not his eyes. I’m not allowed to look in his eyes. I focus on his chin where I have always been told to look. “Look at me eyes Lucy.” He’s asking something that will make him punish me. Is the what he wants. I pass him my knife and wait for him to take it, only then do I look at his eyes. Wait this is wrong. The eyes are different. I frown at him. This isn’t right. Why am I outside not in our house.  
I start shaking and take a few steps back. “Where am I?” I whisper. Daryl frowns at me. “What am I doing out here. Why do you have my knife?” he passes it to me without saying anything. My thoughts are coming back and I realise what has just happened. “Take me home Daryl.” I try to walk towards him but my legs give out. He grabs me before I can hit the ground. He carry’s me back to my trailer still not saying anything. I open the door for us and he puts me on the sofa before closing it back up making sure it’s locked.  
“What happened out there Luc? It like ya thought I was someone else.” He comes and crouches in front of me. He lifts my head so I can look at him. I can see the worry on his face. It makes me want to look away but he wont let me, he’s holding on to my chin keeping me in place.  
“I did.. I thought you were him.” I frown at him trying to figure out how I could of thought that. He looks nothing like him. Where I thought there was blonde it was brown. The face is softer, less sharp. No Where near as angry. Reaching out I touch the skin on his cheek. Even the skin feels different. It’s the eyes that got me though. They are shocking blue not the nearly black brown I saw in my head. “I’m sorry Daryl, your not him. I just panicked I guess. It’s the stress from my brother, it’s getting to me and I thought you were someone else.” I place my hand on his arm letting him know I wasn’t going to look away. He drops his hand but holds mine instead.  
“Who did ya think I was Luc. Ya scared me out there. It was like ya were a robot. I couldn’ get ya up off the ground.” I blink back my tears that were threatening to fall. I had decided along time ago not to cry over that bastard again.  
“I thought you were my ex husband. He was rather dominating to say it nicely. When he died with my daughter with him i fell apart, that's the reason I left England. If he didn’t have my daughter in the back of the car she would still be alive.” I hold my stomach at the thought of my daughter wanting to throw up but only now remembering I haven’t eaten yet today. Daryl looks angry but doesn’t say anything. He’s thinking about what had happened and what I had said. Putting his hand down I move past him and open the cupboard hoping there was something edible in there. I pull out some apples and sink my teeth into one. I feel Daryl behind me but he doesn’t touch me. I lift the apple up and he takes it. Turning around I realise just how close he is. How is he not touching me, he’s so close that if I moved just a centimetre we would be. He lifts his hand up to my hair and pulls out the tie and let’s my hair fall down my back. He runs his fingers through it still managing not to touch my skin.  
“I’m sorry if I have been stressin ya out.” He looks sad.  
“Daryl it wasn’t you, it was me. I was in that situation for years, at one point it was the only way of living I knew. He was my high school boyfriend and I thought the way he was, was normal I guess. You once said that you wanted to kill whoever gave me my scars. It was him. Every time I would disobey him he would slice into my skin. Not deep but enough to cause me pain.” I can see his hands clenched into fists. I want to touch him but I don’t want him to turn away from me. He is angry and I know the limits. He’s not like most men but when it comes to angry they can be all the same. They need to deal with it themselves. I stand there waiting with my eyes closed. After awhile I feel his hands on my waist. I can’t help but sigh. I have missed his touch. He moves his hands up to the buttons on the shirt I am wearing.  
“This is mine.” I hear him say. “Ya look bloody sexy in this ya know. But I think it’s time for bed. We can talk more tomorrow.” He takes the shirt off of me and drops it to the floor before he does the same to his own. He’s trying to distract me from it all. I must say it is working. He takes my hand over to the sofa and he lays down. I stand there wondering what he wants and he lays on his side pushing his back against the wall. He pulls me down and hugs me. God I have missed being in his arms. Smelling his over powering scent sends tingles down to my groin. I feel him kiss the top of my head before resting his chin in the same place. It’s not long before I hear him breathing heavy. I close my eyes hoping I don’t have another night filled with nightmares I can't wake up from. 

 

I wake up as the sun streams through the window onto my face. I blink looking at my surrounds. I freeze when a hand travels down my side. “Ya been asleep for along time. Didn’ feel right wakin ya.” I turn over and see Daryl smiling down at me. I lean up and kiss him only meaning to give him a peck but it turns into a full making out session. He breaks away as I start to move my hand over his cock though his trousers. “ ahhh. Shit Luc are ya sure ya want to do this now. I can wait till yer ready.” I stand up and undo his trousers before pulling them off of him, I do the same to my own. I move him into the middle of the sofa and straddle him.  
“You know Daryl, sometimes you talk to much.” I smile down at him before taking his cock in my hand and moving it to my entrance. As I move down his length I hiss through my teeth not used to how big he is after such along time apart. Once I am sat on his hips I bend forward to kiss him waiting for when I’m used to the feeling. “Shit Daryl I forgot how big you were.” I kiss him again as he moves his hands to my hips. I clench around him and hear him moan. Oh how I have missed that sound. I sit up and move slowly up and down not wanting this to be over too quickly. I feel him pushing me up from below needing me to go faster. I bend forward and whisper in his ear. “Go as fast as you need to baby I’m not going anywhere.” He holds my hip still and starts pounding into me so fast I find it hard to support myself.  
“Shit baby ya feel so good. I’m close. Shit. Ahhh.” I clench around him once more and feel him empty his load into me. I rest my head on his chest with him still inside me and move my fingers the hair there waiting for him to calm down. “Shit I’m sorry Luc. Thought I woulda lasted a bit longer than that.”  
I look up and smile at him, kissing his cheek as I lift myself off of him. “Don’t worry about it Daryl. It happens. I’m just happy to be here with you.” I bend down for my discarded shirt from last night and shrug it on. I open the cupboard and bring down two cups filling both with water from a bottle. I pass one to him as he sits up.  
“I meant what I said last night. Ya really do look fuckin sexy in my clothes.” He says as he pulls at the collar of the shirt.  
“Why is this yours. Well it’s mine now.” I turn and smile at him. He takes both of our cups and place them on the floor. He kneels on the floor on front of my legs and places his hands near my hips. Pulling me forward I am sat on the edge of the sofa. He pushes my torso back to make me lay down. It finally clicks as to what he planning to do. “No Daryl. I haven’t cleaned up yet.”  
He continues to push me back and opens my legs.  
“And. Ya point.” I’m about to speak again when I feel him push his tongue into my lips and finding my hole he pushes further. I can’t help the moan that escapes me. “ Shit ya taste so good.” He says before attacking my pussy like a starved man. He puts his fingers at my entrance and moves them in and out hitting my g-spot Every time. The sound of his moaning turns me on even more. My orgasm blindsided me and I try and be quiet.  
“Shit. Fuck. Daryl. Oh. Oh. Fuck.” My body continues to twitch from my orgasm as he kisses me up my body. He reaches my mouth and kisses me. I open my mouth to taste him and am pleasantly surprised. He’s not wrong we do taste good together. I moan into his mouth hunting for more. I feel him smirk against my mouth as he lines himself up with my pussy. Moving in one quick movement he enters me making me moan loudly. He moves a lot slower this time, trying to make it last. I claw at his back trying to get him to go faster. He begins kissing and nipping at my neck completely ignoring my attempts. I moan even louder as he hit the sweet spot on my neck and I feel myself start to quicken. My moans come closer together and I hear him growling. He bites me one more time and I fall apart shouting loudly.  
“YES. YES. OOOOH. DARYL. FUCK...” I feel him empty his load inside of me and hear him growl one more time. It’s his turn to rest his head on my chest. I stroke his hair and wait for his breathing to calm down.  
“Fuckin hell I’ve missed ya Luc.” He runs his hand up and down my side making me shiver.  
“You only missed the sex then.” He looks up at me frowning but I smile back at him. “I got what you meant Daryl. I missed you too.” He looks sad for a second  
“Don’t leave me again Luc. I can’ live without ya.” He looks deep in my eyes.  
“I’m not going anywhere. I’m sorry I did that. I thought it would be best for everyone.” I sit up pushing him up with me. I hold his head between my hands. “The only time i will ever leave from now on is if you send me away. Okay?”  
He nods at me not being able to say anything. We both know that will never happen. He stands up and searches for his clothes and pulls them on. I go to stand up but get dizzy and have to lay down.  
“Luc are ya okay.”  
“Hmmmm, just need to lay down for a second.” 

 

It takes me 15 minutes before I’m dressed and out of the trailer. We head round to the gate. Waiting for someone to open the door Daryl takes my hand. I smile up at him as we walk through the gate. We walk towards Maggie but before we do Daryl stops me.  
“I think ya should see the doctor.” I frown at him. “Ya have been holding yer stomach for over a week now. I don’t even think ya know ya doing it.” He looks down as I do. Still not getting what he means. Shit does he think. No I can’t be. Oh fuck. I look up at him and shake my head.  
“No, I can’t be. I have the implant. It lasts for 5 yea...” I trail off at the end thinking back to when I got it. “Well shit.” He smiles softly at me.  
“I think ya should go get yerself checked out. Just in case it’s not what we think.” He lets go of my hand and pushes me towards doctor Carson’s trailer. He watches me go in before heading over to Maggie. 

“What can I do for you today Lucy?” I have always liked Carson. I hated his brother, he was always looking at me like I was a piece of meet.  
“Well I think we may need to do a pregnancy test.” He looks up at me worried. He knows who I am and I know why he’s worried. “Please can we just do this and then we figure it all out when we know for sure. Please.” He nods at me and hands me a pot, pointing to the toilet. I come out of the toilet with the pot in my hand half filled. I set it down on the desk and he puts the test in.  
It’s at that point I hear the trucks. Not just any trucks but the ones that used to be mine. Simon’s here and I’m stuck in here waiting to see my fate. We both keep as still as we can and watch out of the window. How long is three minutes for Christ’s sake. I see Simon leave the house and walk this way. I look around for a place to hide but can’t find one. The door opens and Simon walks in followed by Gregory and two men with a box. Simon looks at me and looks confused. I see his eyes flutter down to the desk and back up at me. He is smiling now.  
“Hello Miss Negan. Have we got good new?”  
I put on my sanctuary face hoping it will work out here. “What are you doing here Simon.” He flinches and I smile slightly happy to see it does work.  
“We were sent here for the doc by Negan. He needs to come back with us.” I shake my head at him.  
“Oh dear, dear Simon. Do you really think I’m going to just let you take him. There is a doctor there. You don’t need two.” It’s his turn to shake his head at me. He steps closer and picks up the stick to take a look at it.  
“There is no doctor there anymore. So we need this one now. If you want him you’ll need to come back with us.” He passes me the stick and pulls Carson out the door with him. He bends his head back around the door frame. “ Oh and congratulations Miss Negan. I hope we see you again soon.”  
I watch Gregory follow Simon like a little lap dog, I know he’s up to something. I look down at the test in my hand I see the very red cross in the test window. ‘Well shit!’ I drop to the floor.  
Not only does Maggie need Carson but now apparently I do too. I stay on the floor trying to think and I hear the trucks leave. After 10 minutes have passed I feel Maggie sitting next to me. “Were you in here the whole time. Did they see you. Lucy please talk to us. We need to know what happened.” I lift my hand and pass her the stick wordlessly. I watch her look at it and then to my stomach and back to the stick. She starts to smile but then her face drops. She has realised what I did when I looked at it the first time.  
I might be the only one that can get the doctor back but it will mean killing my brother and taking back control. She looks at me for awhile before I hear Daryl come storming in.  
“Ah good ya found her.” He turns to me. “Why didn’t ya hide.”  
“Not now Daryl she needs a minute.” Maggie says as she gets up. She passes him the stick.  
What is supposed to be a happy moment is full of dread. I look up at him finding him crouched down beside me, smiling. How can he smile right now. He takes my face in his hands and kisses me. Not meaning to, I get up on my knees so we are the same height and kiss him back. Went we finally pull apart he’s face falls. I watch as what will go down moves across his mind. He sits on the floor much like I had. “Well shit.” I can’t help but let out a little giggle at that.  
“Great minds think alike.” He looks at me confused for a second. He grabs my hand and pulls me over and I sit in his lap. He rests his hand on my stomach.  
“We’ll sort it out. Together.” He whispers in my ear. I nod my head as I link my fingers with his. We know now that the only way to get back what is ours is to fight for it.  
I will be damned if James was going to take this child’s father away or any of its real family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this chapter was quite dark but now we know a bit more about Lucy and Negan.   
> Hope you enjoyed :)


	14. Chapter 14

Daryl’s pov

I don’t know whether to be happy or sad right now. The only doctor we had is now gone. What the fuck are we going to do now. I can see in Lucy’s eyes that she thinks she’s the only one that can get him back. That is not fucking happening. I need to see Rick, he now needs to know everything. I think Lucy wants to stay here. I can’t leave her, she is my life now. Even if she wasn’t carrying my child I would still need her safe.  
When she came and saw me at the sanctuary I saw something in her eyes. Pure hate. I thought it was at me but as soon as the door closed it was like a switch flipped in her. After she left she was all I could think about. I knew she didn’t mean those words she said as she left. Those were for my benefit. She was trying to keep me safe. I saw a side to her that day that made me think that if I had met her a year earlier I wouldn’t be seeing the person she actually is. If anyone else was in my position they wouldn’t forgive so easily. But they don’t see what I see.   
She always seems to be in control. Never letting anything slip by with out being noticed. Yes she tough as shit but she’s also vulnerable, she just hides it well. It’s only when she sleeps do I see how bad it is. It started off that anytime I would get up and leave the bed, she would be moaning and reaching out for someone. Only stopping when she feels the warmth that comes from a human body. But it quickly changed. One time when I had left the bed I could hear her down stairs calling out to me. Thinking she had woken up I rushed up to find her curled up with her knees tucked up to her chest on my side of the bed. She had quietened down some but was still moaning out my name. I crawled back into bed and she latched onto me before I could even lay down.   
It’s these things that no-one else sees that made me forgive her. She needs me just as much as I need her.  
So no I won’t leave her side, and now with the baby I won’t let her go anywhere near her brother. Not that I would of allowed her to do that anyway. Maggie may of sat me down and told me what Lucy had told her. How she was the one to change her brother. I don’t believe that one bit. There had to be something there to begin with for someone to be that sick in the head. 

I sit outside Jesus’s trailer waiting for Lucy to finish talking with him. Maggie looks over at me concerned and makes her way to me.   
“How long have they been in there.” She asks me looking up at the door.   
“Too long. She said she needed to talk with him about a plan. She kicked me out when I kept tellin her no.” She smiled down at me before sitting next to me.   
“She certainly is something isn’t she. After everything she has been through she’s still fighting.” She pauses as if she just thought of something. “Just like you really. I guess that’s why you two are perfect for each other.” I look at her and frown.   
“What do ya mean by that.” She shakes her head at me.  
“I don’t mean it like that. What I meant was that you are both fighters and won’t stop until everything is sorted. That you compliment each other. She keeps you level headed so you don’t run off at the first sign of trouble, which you try to do a lot. For her you make her stronger. You give her something to fight for, a life that she never thought she could have. She’ll come to the right decision soon, trust that she will. Just keep reminding her SOFTLY that it’s not just herself that she needs to think about anymore.”   
“Yeah that’s the problem. She’s not thinkin of herself right now, she thinkin about you.” She looks at me for along time frowning. She shakes her head and gets up.  
“Tell her to come see me once she’s done in there please.”   
“Mmmmm yeah all right.” She nods my way and heads off to the house. 

 

I hear Lucy shouting and something being thrown before I’m being pushed off the step by the door.   
“Daryl we're leaving. Now!” I look at her and then to Jesus.   
“Maggie wants to see ya. Go see her and I’ll get ya stuff.” She nods at me and walks into the house. “What happened?” Jesus looks at me and moves his hand to the side to let me in.   
“ She wants to go to the sanctuary and try and speak to her brother about getting the doctor. She wants to go by herself. After she told me her entire plan I told her no and she lost it.” I see the glass over the floor and look back at him.  
“What do I do then. Lock her away, cause ya know damn well she’ll find a way to get there.” He shakes his head at me.  
“Take her to Alexandria. Show her how things are there, and most of all tell Rick who she is. She seems to think that if he knows then he will use her against Negan. Prove to her how wrong she is.” I can only nod at him before leaving his trailer. 

 

I grab all of her things from the trailer outside of the wall and walk back with them. I see her come out of the house as I’m loading up the saddle bags on my bike. She wipes her face before getting to me. She wraps her arms around my waist and places her head just under my chin.   
“Can we go now Daryl. I’m ready to go home.” I pull her away from me and look in her eyes.   
“ Ya sure we can go somewhere else if ya want.” She shakes her head at me.  
“I want to be back in the house that I shared with you, no where else. Take me home.”   
I climb on my bike and kick start it. She climbs on behind me holding tight around my waist. I smile as she holds tighter as we get going. 

 

It doesn’t take us long to get back to Alexandria and when we get there everyone is greeting us at the gate. She gets off first and runs straight past everyone and straight to Judith. The baby already reaching out for her, as soon as she saw her, trying to hit Carl in the face.   
“So your back then.” Rick comes and stands beside me.   
“Yeah we are and I need ya help.” We leave everyone there and head to his house.   
“So what do you need help with brother.” He says as he grabs a couple of bottles of water from the fridge handing one to me. I take a deep breath to prepare me for what I need to do.  
‘I’m sorry Luc.’  
“Its about Negan. He’s taken the doc at hilltop and Lucy wants to go get him by herself.” He looks at me confused. “She told me, before we met him, somethin she said I shouldn' tell ya.” I feel bad already like I'm betraying her trust. Rick continues to look at me, waiting for me to get to the point. “Her real name is Lucille Negan and she is the younger sister of James Negan.” I see his hands begin to shake. Fearing for her a little I decide to add in something else. “She’s also pregnant.” He stops and stares at me as soon as I say it. I look down at the floor and wait for him to do something.   
“So she wants to go there and get the doctor back for Maggie, I’m guessing, and what just walk back out with him and nothing will happen?” he says calmly I look up at him. “Also congratulations brother.” He adds smiling at me.  
We talk for about an hour before they all come crashing through the door laughing. Michonne has Judith and comes over to us. Placing a kiss on Ricks cheek she hands Judith over before opening the fridge.   
Carl and Lucy are still laughing as they flop down on the couch.   
“What a so funny.” Rick walks up behind them.   
“Its nothing really dad, just a really bad joke.” Carl says as he picks himself off the couch and heads up the stairs. I see Lucy look over at me and I see how tired she is.   
“We’re gonna go Rick. Talk to ya tomorrow.” I head to the door and hold my hand out. She takes it instantly and we walk home.

I open the door for us and she steps in.   
“Nothing has changed.” She moves more into the room and stands near the stairs. She kicks off her shoes and starts to undo her trousers. Letting them fall to the floor she kicks them over to me. “I need you. I need you now.” I start to shake my head but she interrupts me. “Don’t you dare tell me no.” She goes up the stairs and throws her top and bra down. I run up the stairs to see her tying the scarfs on the head board. My cock twitches as she moves around the bed and pulls her panties off and throws them at me. She gets on her knees in front of me much like how she did in the woods. But I can tell this time it’s different, her breathing is harder. I move my hand under her chin and get her to look at me.  
“Are ya sure ya want this.” I ask her making sure she was thinking straight. She only nods at me. “What about the baby?”   
“Daryl don’t start that. It’ll be fine. We have had sex while it's been in there you know.” She is starting to get angry with me. I let go of her chin.  
“Did I say ya could look at me.” She smiles before looking back at her palms. This feels wrong. I shouldn’t be doing this. But said she needed me. I bend down to her ear and whisper. “Tell me to stop if ya need me too.”   
“Yes sir.” As she says it my heart skips a beat and my cock twitches. It’s just at that point I realise maybe I need this as much as she does. I stand back up in front of her.   
“Take my clothes off.” She lift her hands to my trousers and only looks at what she’s doing. As she pulls them down my legs she brushes her fingers down with them. She stands up, never looking at my face, and undoes my shirt and pushes it off my shoulders letting it fall to the floor. Getting back down on her knees I brace myself using the doorframe so she can pull my shoes and trousers off completely. I am stood only in my boxers.  
“I meant all of me clothes.” She lift her hands once again and puts her thumbs in the sides of my boxers and pulls them down, licking her lips when my cock is freed. “Kiss me.”   
“Where would you like my lips sir.” Oh this girl knows exactly what to say to turn me on more.  
“I want ya to take my big cock in ya mouth.” She smiles before kissing the end of my cock. Opening her mouth she slowly moves forward so she can get as much of me in as possible. She bobs there for awhile before shocking me and taking me all in her mouth and down her throat, making an incredible sensation as she hums. She continues to deep throat me and I can feel myself getting close. My breathing picks up and my moans get louder. I put my hands on her hair to let her know I’m close and she pats my leg.   
“Shit Luc. Fuck.” As I cum I can feel her swallowing my load around my length.   
I catch my breath and pull her up.  
“I think we both need a shower.” I take her hand and pull her towards the bathroom, leaving her by the door I turn the water on. “Come here.” She walks over and I help her in the shower climbing in after her. I hear her quietly sigh as the water runs off of her body. I grab the wash cloth and soap and put them in her hands. “I think ya should wash me.”   
“Yes sir.” She lathers up the cloth and moves in small circles over my body. When she is done I take the cloth out of her hand and wash her down too. Bending down I part her legs and use my hand to wash her pussy. Feeling that she is already wet.   
“Already wet for me.” I look up and see her smile. I stand up and look down at her. As she stares at my chest. “What would you like me to do.”   
“I would like you to take me to bed, sir.” I can hear the smile in her voice.  
“Ok lead the way.” I get out and help her. She moves in front of me and I watch her pretty arse move from side to side as she walks. We get to the bedroom and she stops. I lean in to her ear. “On the bed.” She get on it and lays in the middle with her arm above her. I tie her wrists using the scarfs she had tied to the bed earlier. I climb on the bed and sit between her legs just looking at her. I can see the tiny rounding on her abdomen and that the curve of her hips is wider. Her breasts are also bigger, I reach up and cup them in my hand moving her nipples between my fingers. She arches her back pushing them more into my hands. Her face is contorted into a silent sigh.   
“Yer so beautiful Luc.” I see her try to hide a smile. I pick her legs up and bend them at the knee, after placing her feet on the bed I push her legs open as far as they will go. I trail kisses up her thighs stopping just before her mound each time.   
I lick up her pussy and taste her. She's still as sweet as ever and I can’t help the moan that escapes me. I move my tongue on her clit as my fingers teases her entrance. I can feel her moving trying to get me to put my fingers in. I place my other hand on her hip to stop her moving and hear her frustrated sigh. I push my fingers in slowly brushing up against her g-spot. She moans from above getting louder with every move I make. I stop before she can cum and move up to her face.   
“Kiss me.” She licks my lips before she kisses me making me growl. I line up my cock with her entrance and move into her slowly. As I bottom out I undo her restraints. Her hands move down to my hips and pushes them trying to get me to move.   
“Pease Daryl.” It’s with her words that I start moving getting faster with every minute that passes.   
“Faster.” She moans and I start to feel her clenching around me. I can feel myself getting close and doing everything I can, I try and hold my self back and make sure she cums first. I feel her clamp around me like a vice as she cums shouting out gibberish.  
I find my own orgasm as she comes down from her own only to spur on another. She pushes her nails into my back as she cums again calling out my name.   
“Daryl. Yes. Yes. YES!”   
I pull out of her and lay down resting my head on the pillow. I feel my eyes starting to close.   
“I love you Daryl Dixon.” I look over to her and pull her on to my chest.   
“I love you too Lucy.” I can’t say her full name. It hurts just thinking about it. I hear her fall asleep and I extract myself from under her. I go down to the kitchen and fill a glass with some water. How can I be with the woman I love if I can't even say her name without thinking of that asshole.   
“Lucille Negan.” I test it out. It feels strange but not wrong. It’s like it’s not related to him at all. It’s just her name. As if on cue I hear her moaning. I climb back up the stairs and am shocked to see her looking at me.   
“You left.” She looks at me as I come over and climb back in bed.   
“Don’ worry Lucille. I’m not goin anywhere.”


	15. Chapter 15

Negan’s pov 

 

 

Today’s the day we attack. Everything that could stop this happening, is. I’m so pissed of that I start thinking of my sister. At lest she is at the hilltop out of harms way. When Daryl escaped I thought he would go running to her. I mean from what I’ve seen what man wouldn’t. She been through so much but she don’t stand for any shit. I regret so much when it comes to her. Not being there when she grew up for one. She moved to England with out me knowing anything about it. I was busy at collage when she left. My parents excuse was that my aunt couldn't have kids and Lucille was just too much for them. She was just a normal 4 year old. Fucking idiots I’m glad they are dead. Never even cared for their only daughter.   
I visited when I could but it was never enough. Every time I went that prick husband of hers stopped her seeing me. I’m glad he’s dead too. I never expected to loose my niece too.   
These morons are out side the truck trying to move the cut down trees. This is taking too long. Someone better come up with a better idea soon or I’m going to loose my shit. 

 

 

Mr smarty pants, from Rick’s group came up with a plan and so far it seems to be working. I’m about to open the coffin and let Sasha have her say when I see she’s dead and trying to rip my throat out. This fucking bitch lied to me. 

 

 

I have Rick on his knees in front of me again. He really didn’t learn his lesson the first time. I don’t want to have to kill the kid but no-one else is around. This kid is such a little bad ass. He deserves so much more than a dickhead father. I’m about to kill the kid and a fucking tiger jumps onto someone behind me. Who the fuck has a tiger. Ezekiel comes round one of the houses with his ‘kingdom’. Lucille never mentioned a tiger at the kingdom.   
My people are dying and the garbage people have run away, fucking pussies. I go to climb into my truck and see someone from the corner of my eye.   
“Hello brother.” Lucille is here. Fuck.  
I see her hit the ground before the shot even registers. I run up to her just as Simon does. The blood is poring out of her stomach. He picks her up and carry’s her back to the truck. She won’t like this. I put my hand on Simon’s arm and give him a what you doing look.   
“She’s pregnant.” It’s the only words I need. Quickly helping him get her in I jump in after them. Flipping them all off as we go past. Fuck I knew she liked Daryl but I didn’t think they were this serious.   
‘Don’t let this child die too. I’m not sure she’ll come back from this.’ 

 

 

 

I watch her as she sleeps. The doctor did everything he could and all we have to do now is wait. He’s not sure if the child is still alive as she lost a lot of blood and we don’t have the equipment to check. I grab her hand and hold it absently running my thumb along it.   
“Shit Lucille. What were you doing there.” She moves her fingers.  
“Why am I here.” She looks at me and moves her other hand to her stomach. The look on her face changes from soft to hard as soon as she does. She let’s go of my hand and heads to the bathroom, locking the door behind her.   
She’s in there for almost 10 minutes before she comes out. I look at her face and I don’t see sadness or upset, I see fury. I stand up as she comes more into the room.   
“Clothes.” I point to the end of the bed and she grabs them before going back into the bathroom. She’s back out before I know it.   
“Is he still alive.”   
“Yes.” I know exactly who she means and I know what she has planned. It’s like I’m looking at the old her. To say I’m not scared right now would be an understatement. Before she was scary, now she’s just terrifying. “ I have him locked in one of the cells. I was waiting for you to wake up before I set a punishment.”   
“You don’t get to do anything.” She snarls at me making me step back. She pushes past me and grabs my bat. Opening the door she sees Simon.  
“Sweetie, take me to him.” He bows his head and leads her down to the cells. She used to do this all of the time when she was in charge. But this was different this was pure fury. She was always angry but level headed about it.   
I follow her down and as she reaches the door Dwight opens it for her without saying a word. It’s like they know what she wants without her saying or doing anything. It's a beautiful thing to see, such power over everyone around.  
She puts the bat on her shoulder much like I usually do and walks into the room. Someone turns the lights on and I see what is waiting for her.   
He’s knelt on the floor with his hands in front of him as if to ask for forgiveness.   
“Get up!” he stands up and bows his head.  
“I’m sorry Miss Negan I didn’t know who you were.” As he finishes what he’s saying she swings the bat at his leg hitting his knee, hitting it so hard it bends the wrong way. I can’t help the smile that comes to my face. Maybe my sister is back.   
She hits his hand breaking all of his fingers. The screams that are coming from him don’t seem to be affecting her but they are affecting Simon and Dwight. She puts her boot on his broken hand and presses making him scream more.   
“You shot me. That was your first mistake.” She lifts his head with the bat making him look at her. “Trying to apologise was your second.” She get down to his level and gets in his face. “Killing my unborn child was the third.” Standing up Simon moves towards her but she pushes him back. “Not now my sweet. Why don’t you leave the room now darling. No-one needs to see this.” She turns back and lifts her foot of the guys hand. I move into the room thinking she may need me and the others leave and close the door.   
I watch as she lifts the bat and bashes it into his head over and over until she is out of breath. She has tears running down her face. She turns and look at me with empty eyes.   
“ Get this shit cleaned up.” She is talking to me just like the others. Just another hitman. I nod my head and open the door for her. She pauses in front of Simon and he walks with her back to her room.   
“Go get the cleaners. Tell them nothing. We don’t need this getting out. If they say anything to anyone kill them and put them out front.” Dwight nods his head and goes off. I look around the room smiling. Maybe we won’t be fighting on separate sides anymore. My baby sister has come back! 

 

 

Daryl’s pov 

 

I saw her last as we were fighting with the garbage people. Then she just disappeared. I have been looking for her everywhere. As everyone is cleaning up I am wondering around looking at every face I come to. Someone puts there hand on my arm stopping me.   
“She’s not here.” It’s Jesus.   
“Where the fuck is she.”   
“I saw her get shot. They took her.”   
My knees give out on me and I hit the ground hard.  
“Its the best place for her, they have a doctor. She’ll be back.”   
I shake my head not really hearing what he is saying. Rick comes over and helps Jesus get me up and sits me down on the curb. How could her brother allow his people to shoot his own sister. Is he really that determined to get her back that bad. I stand up shocking both Rick and Jesus and move towards the crowd of people. Rick goes and stands up with Maggie and Ezekiel as they all talk about what they all plan to do. I’m not listening, I’m coming up with my own plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!


	16. Chapter 16

Lucille’s pov

My stomach hurts but it’s nothing compared to the emptiness I feel. I thought that if I killed the guy, that stole my future with a single bullet, I would feel some justice. I don’t, I just feel more empty. I still haven’t let go of my bat. It’s a comfort in a way. Like this is who I am now. It’s been a few hours since I killed him and James has tried to talk to me a few times. I won’t give that fucking man a minute of my time. I would kill him if he wasn’t my brother. The things he has done to me, I’m surprised I even forgave him the first time.   
“ You need to eat sister.”   
“Fuck you!” These are the first words I have spoken to him since I left the room. He looks at me with panic in his eyes. I have never been like this with him.   
“Please. Just eat something Miss Negan. Get some of your strength back.” Oh my dear Simon. I grab a single piece of carrot off of the plate he is holding and eat it. I wave the rest of it away and he smiles as he backs away.   
“I need to go!”   
“Where would you like to go.” I hear James behind me. “We can take you anywhere you would like to go.” A single name comes to mind but I don’t say it. I need to go on my own.   
“Your not taking me anywhere. I’m going on my own. I want a car.” He moves round to face me and shakes his head.  
“No, I only just got you back.” That’s when I really lose it.  
“Got me back. Are you fucking serious. You lost me the second my child died.”   
“I didn’t know he would shoot you. How is that my fault.” I point the bat at him making him back into the wall behind.  
“Not that child you arrogant prick. My beautiful daughter.” I wipe my eye, tears threatening to fall. “My beautiful smart 5 year old daughter. With bouncy brown hair and green eyes. The little girl that idolized her uncle, and you killed her.” He shakes his head at me but I push the bat into his chest making him wince. “Don't lie to me. I found out you called your little buddy’s for a hit on my dickhead husband. I would of let that go. But you forgot to tell them one thing didn't you. That he drove her to school every morning.” He hangs his head down.   
“How did you find out.”   
“After I had already given you the power to this place I was on a run. We came across a group of people looking for safety. We let them stay with us for the night before bringing them back. We asked them the usual. ‘what’s the worse thing you have ever done’ thing. They go round and take it in turns. One of them turns to me and says ‘Accidently killing your daughter’. I got Simon to pull him away from the rest and tied him to a chair. To say I was kind would be a lie but he told me everything I wanted to know, right down to what you payed him.”   
“I’m sorry. More than you can know.” I move the bat away from him and start to walk out of the room.   
“That isn’t good enough James. Now go do what I have asked. I won’t ask nicely again.” He bows his head before leaving the room. 

 

Simon has come to collect me. As we are walking he asked me something don’t fully know the answer to.   
“Why didn’t you tell him you knew before.”   
“I knew the reason he did it. He just forgot about her and was more focused on keeping us safe. But now another child has died because of him and I’m all out of forgiveness. He doesn’t get it this time.” I take his hand in mine. “Why don’t you come with me my sweet. I trust you more than the rest.”   
“No Miss I can’t. I know where you are going and they will kill me on sight.” He hangs his head , lifting my hand and placing a kiss on it. “I will miss you Lucille.”   
“As I will you my darling Simon.” I give him a hug before turning from him. I see James next to the open door of the car. I walk up to him and sit in the car placing the bat in the passenger side chair.  
“Please just stay.” He asks one more time.   
“No!” I slam the door and drive off.

I don’t stop until I see the gates of Alexandria in front of me. I see 4 people in the watch platform looking at the car. I stick my head out the window and Rosita shouts down to let me in. I drive up to my house and get out the car, grabbing the bat as an after thought. Heading inside I place the bat on the kitchen island and sit on the stool looking at it. I can’t stop thinking about what I just did. How I turned into someone I ran away from. I put my hand on my abdomen and send up a silent sorry. A sorry to the child that will never see the light of day. The baby that was no bigger than a grape. I saw it in the toilet.   
The hatred I feel right now I can't contain. I grab the bat and walk out the house heading back to the car. My side hurts but I need to do this. I see Rick running over to me but I get in the car anyway. Driving down to a place I had long forgotten. 

 

I get to the store and it’s just as I remember. Locked from the outside I can still see them moving inside. There are 4 of them bashing into the empty shelves. I smash the glass and let them free. Bashing the heads in on every single one of them. The one I want comes out last. I see the bullet hole that I put in him. I look at his decomposing face and remember everything he said that night about James.  
I do to this guy what I want to do to James, breaking every big bone in his body and watch him as he can barely move towards me. As I watch him move I think about how pitiful James is to want complete power over everyone. I remember feeling the same way but I snapped out of it, he has been like it his whole life. Taking pity on the dead man in front of me I hit him once and cave his head in. I climb back in the car feeling a bit calmer and head home. 

 

When I get back I can hear shouting at the gate.   
“What do ya mean ya don’ know where she went. Ya saw her come back and just let her leave. Now ya won’ let me go after her.” Oh Daryl. How could I forget to let you know I was okay.   
“We're in the middle of a war, that’s why. She’s the only one that can leave without the threat of death.” Rick is trying to reason with him, but it’s not working.   
“ She got fuckin shot. How does that make her safe.” Hearing enough I beep my horn once and the gate fly’s open. I see everyone has their guns raised, pointing in my direction, as I drive the car through the gate. I open the door and once again grab the bat. Everyone looks at me then the bat. Daryl’s the only one looking at my stomach.   
“Rosita. She needs stitches.” I look down and see that the bottom of my shirt is dripping fresh blood. I start to feel dizzy and he grabs me before I fall. Resting my head on his shoulder I let him carry me to the infirmary.   
He lays me down on the bed and take the bat out of my hand and places it near the door. He sits with me as Rosita re-cleans the wound and stitches me back up. I reach my hand out to his face and make him look me in the eyes.   
“I’m sorry Daryl. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.” Tears start to fall as my body is taken over by shock and exhaustion. He raises his hand to my hair and runs his fingers through it.   
“Shhhhh yer back and yer safe.” I shake my head at him and let out a sob. I pull him closer and whisper in his ear.  
“Not all of me.” And then the world goes black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit more back ground on Lucy. I feel like she is blossoming into someone very special.   
> Let me know what you think.  
> Until next time :)


	17. Chapter 17

Daryl’s pov

 

 

 

Lucille slept for a week, or at lest she didn’t leave the bed. Refusing food and company. Anyone that came close to her she would end up sending away in a detached voice. I know she’s grieving but I thought she would be willing to fight. We still have no idea what happened, why she has the bat with her namesake. All she does is lay there looking at the bat by the door. When we moved her out of the infirmary she started going crazy until we brought the bat as well. I’m scared for her, and a little bit of her. Coming down the stairs from my old room I have to stop. She’s up and she’s singing. It’s not a song I know and I’m surprised she found a working CD player.

 

 

_Oooh, love..._

_I get so lost, sometimes_

_Days pass, and this emptiness fills my heart_

_When I want to run away_

_I drive off in my car_

_But whichever way I go_

_I come back to the place you are_

_And all my instincts, they return_

_And this grand facade, so soon will burn_

_Without a noise, and without my pride_

_I reach out from the inside, ooh oooh whoah_

 

_In your eyes, the light, the heat_

_I am complete_

_I see the doorway to a thousand churches_

_The resolution through all my the fruitless searches_

_Oh I see the light I see the heat_

_Oh, I want to be that complete_

_I want to touch the light, the heat, I see in your eyes_

 

_Love, I don't like to see so much pain_

_So much wasted, and these moments keep slipping away_

_I get so tired of working so hard for my survival_

_I look to the time with you to keep me awake and alive_

_And all my instincts, they return_

_And this grand facade, so soon will burn_

_Without a noise, and without my pride I reach out from the inside, ooh oooh whoah_

 

_In your eyes, the light, the heat_

_I am complete_

_I see the doorway to a thousand churches_

_The resolution of all my fruitless searches_

_Oh, I see the light I see the heat_

_Oh, I want to be that complete_

_I want to touch the light, the heat I see in your eyes_

 

 

I smile going down the stairs as quiet as possible. I stand at the bottom staring at the sight before me. She’s cooking and sing at the top of her voice without a care in the world. She doesn’t know I’m here, I just wish I had a video camera right now. I want to remember this forever.

“Are you just going to stand there or are you going to eat your breakfast. I made pancakes.” She makes me jump, she never hears me coming usually.

“Well good mornin to ya too.” I smile kissing the top of her head as she wraps her arms around my waist. I don’t want to bring up the past week, she might move back into her head. “I missed ya.” I whisper and she tightens her hold on me.

“I just needed some time. I sick of wallowing in my own self despair when I’m not the only one feeling the loss.” She raises her head and stands on her tip toes. “I’m not ready to talk about what happened yet, but I will help you with anything you need to know about the sanctuary.” She kisses me quickly before turning away. The way she just said that makes me wonder more about what happened.

I sit next to her and we eat in silence. She moves her food around her plate but she does eat some. She has lost some weight and I need to get her to eat more. I not going to push her on it though. She’s trying, that’s what counts. She gets up and puts her plate by the sink and kisses me on the cheek before leaving the house. I need to see Rick and sort out this plan he has and how it won’t work. Damn man wants to pull a governor on the unsuspecting people at the sanctuary. A truck load of walkers breaking their gates ain’t going to do much. We have fought more with less than they have.

 

 

I just spent two hours wasting my time. Rick just going to do what he thinks is best and the rest of us can be damned. No matter how many times we told him there are civilians there he didn’t listen. Michonne is going to talk with him alone and try again. I’m hoping it will work out cause I don’t want to be killing any innocent people, not if I can help it. I can hear grunting and shouting coming from the pond. I know some of them are training. But that’s with weapons, this is hand to hand combat. I can see Jesus but who’s with him?

What I see is magnificent. Lucy is fighting with Jesus. It also looks like he’s having trouble keeping up. She is quick and though her punches don’t look that hard she keeps aiming for the same places. I find this just as beautiful as finding her singing this morning. She lands one final punch to his gut and Jesus ends up on his back. He looks up and smiles at her. She grins too as she helps him up. She hugs him and I can see her say thank you. When she sees me she comes bounding over, jumps up and flings herself in my arms. I only just catch her. She smiles before placing a kiss on my cheek. She’s treading her fingers through my hair.

“I need to go do something and I want you to come with me.” She begins as she jumps down. Grabbing my hand she pulls my hand towards the house.

 

 

She makes me sit on the sofa and stands in front of me. “Now be calm and hear me out. Okay?” she knows me too well, I somehow knew I wouldn't like where this was going. I cant help my eyes wondering. Her clothes are sticking to her figure. She may of lost weight but god Damn she still looks good. I have to rearrange myself or I won’t be able to concentrate on what she wants to say. I swear to god if she sat in my lap right now I would give her anything she wanted.

“I need to see Negan to organise a sort of truce. Unfortunately I can’t make him back down completely but I can get him to make sure some of us are safe.” She speaks so quick I have to go through it in my head again and slow it down. My eyes move up and down her body again looking at every curve she has. For fuck sake she couldn’t of changed first. She raises her eyebrow at me when I look at her face. Shit she caught me looking.

I clear my throat as if to start talking but what do I say to that. I know he won’t kill her so she’s only one that can do it. If what happened when she got shot is anything to go by then I know he cares. That is the only redeeming thing I can find in him.

“I’m not sayin no but I won’ let ya go till ya tell me what happened.” I know I’m giving her an ultimatum. I can see on her face that she doesn’t like it one bit. I stand up in front of her and raise her head so she looks at me. “Please. I just got ya back, I don’ want to lose ya to yer head again.” She’s is looking in my eyes for something. Maybe she can see how badly this past week has affected me. How all I could do was watch as she started wasting away. She lost a baby, we didn’t even get to have a talk about it before.... I cant even think about it. She doesn’t know this but I never left the house. My usual way of dealing with grief would be to go out there and find something to shoot at. But she was here and I thought eventually she would need me, and even though she was off in her head I needed her. This week she didn’t call out for me, she just screamed. I took to sleeping in a chair near the bed so she would sleep more soundly.

“I killed the man that took our baby’s future away.” She takes a breath and closes her eyes. “I killed him brutally and without remorse. I needed to do it or I would of broken. I saw it you know. After it left my body. The pain I felt then was just as bad as when I lost Annie. My daughter. For hours all I could see was red. It was James’s fucking fault I lost yet another child. He called a hit on my husband and killed her too.” She moves and sits on the couch pulling me down with her. “I didn’t find out until after everything. It’s another reason I ran away. When I’m with him it’s easy for forget he did it, cause I’m so wrapped up in what needs to be done. But this time it different, I want him dead for all of the pain he has caused to everyone. Not just me.” She looks at me seeing if I see her any differently. I couldn’t, it just shows more of the type of person she is. She has lost 2 children at lest one of them I knew she wanted. I cant imagine any other 27 year old that would still be completely sane having gone through what she has. I put my hand on her cheek and she leans into it.

“Luc ya don’t have to tell me anymore. I don’ like it but what have ya planned.” Her eyes brighten not expecting me to say yes. Maybe I have been harsh in the past. This is different. It’s something only she can do.

“I plan to go there and tell him what will be happening from now on. Simon might not be allowed to help me but he won’t allow me to come to any harm. If he’s not there then Dwight will do. He’ll help me.” I can feel the growl in my throat and I only know it escapes when she frowns and shifts back a bit.

“Daryl. Calm down. He’s loyal and I know him. I found him, his wife and her sister just walking down a road. He may of fucked up a few times but he didn’t deserve what he got. James went to far with that. That man is broken and the only way to bring him back would be for him to get some revenge. No matter how little it is.”

“So ya plan to go to the sanctuary again?” She could loose herself going back in there. “ No. I can’t. I’ll stand at the gate and call him out, Dwight or Simon will come out and we'll organise a place to meet. I will tell him he’s allowed 4 guards. No more, no less and I will have the same.”

“So who ya gonna take?” she can’t take any hilltopers that’s for sure. All but Jesus have gone back, he only stayed to help her. It almost killed me when he said that he may be the only one to bring her back from herself. I shake the thoughts away. That’s not the point of this right now.

“Well that’s where you come in.” She pulls my hand to her heart. “I’m not leaving anywhere without you. If you say you won’t come, I won’t go. Simple as that.” I raise my eyebrows at her. Is she being serious. She’s giving me that power over her. After everything she has been through I would of thought she would fight this more. “If we go then you can choose the other 3 but please not Rick. It will grind both of their gears and it will end in a fight. That is not what this meeting is for.”

“How will this work out though. Ya just walk up to the gate and say this all to whoever comes out and they just except it.” She smiles at me then. “I’m glad you never met me before I ran away.” She puts her hands on both of my cheeks and kisses me. “Do you trust me?” I frown at her. She expects me to be able to think clearly with her this close to me!

“Of course I do.” My voice breaks a bit, she smiles at me and goes to stand up.

“We will need a car and you’ll need a long range gun to keep an eye on me. Don’t look at me like that. You can’t come up to the gates with me. That’s not how this is going to work. I’m as safe there as I am here with you.” I don’t like this one bit. But I’m glad she choose to tell me about rather than just run off and do it. I will help her but I can’t promise that if I see him I won’t kill him!

“When do we leave?” I ask her looking away as she takes her top off and throws in on the couch.

“Soon. We may have to see some other people first. I’m going for a shower.” She bends down and I shift as my trousers tighten even more. She lifts my head so I have to look at her. Her eyes are black and heavy with lust.

“Feel free to join me!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the hits and kudos. :)


	18. Chapter 18

She turns from me and I watch her ass sway side to side as she climbs the stairs. I can hear her footsteps as she goes into the bathroom. I sit there debating with myself as to if this is a good idea. I hear the water turn on and that’s it I can’t take anymore. Rushing to the stairs I find her just climbing into the shower. Dropping my clothes as quick as I can I get in too.   
She turns around taking my arms and wrapping them around her. She smirks up at me as my cock nestles itself in-between her legs.   
“I was wondering if you were gonna come up you know.” She puts her arms around my neck and pulls herself up so she is at my height. “Daryl I missed you too.” She kisses me and with that I’m gone. My hands move over every part of her body. I grip her hips tight as she wraps her legs around my waist. Lowering herself down on my cock I relish in the feel of her surrounding me. Letting out a growl I turn us around and push her up against the wall before moving my hips.   
“Ya feel so fuckin good Luc. I could never have enough of this.” I rest my forehead against hers as we move in unison with each other.   
“ Fuck Daryl. I love you.” She grabs my hair and pulls my head back before kissing me hard. I can already feel her getting close and I up the pace so she can have her release. As she comes she pushes herself down and I can feel my own orgasm coming. I thrust a few more times before lifting her up and spurting my load over the tiles. 

Setting her down I pull her into my arms. I can feel the tears threatening. How many times have I almost lost her. Yet she is still here, with me. She pushes away just enough to look at me. Lifting her hand she trails her finger just under my eye. She frowns and hugs me tighter. I’m not sure how but she can always sense what I’m feeling. We stay there like that until the water turns cold. 

 

 

Wrapped up in towels we head to the bedroom. I stand in the doorway and watch her move around the room. She opens one of the draws, what was my draw.   
“Where’s your stuff?” she frowns at me and I look down.   
“Ya didn’t want anyone in yer room so I moved.” She brushes past me. I don’t know what she’s doing but I can hear a lot of banging. I look up as she dumps all of my stuff on the bed. She sorts thought the items not caring that her towel is slipping.   
“You don’t know much about women do you. I didn’t mean you have to move into a different fucking room Daryl.” She starts putting everything away but I’m distracted by the way her body is moving. The way every time she slaps a draw her tits bounce violently. The way she stomps her way across the room makes her hips sway even more. As she puts the last items away I walk up behind her and grab her waist.   
“I may not know much about the way ya are but fuck me yer beautiful right now.” She moves her head to look at me, as she does I lower my head and nip and suck at the soft skin on her neck.   
“Daryl, I didn’t mean it......” I cut her off as I cup her tits pulling and twisting her nipples in-between my fingers. “mmmm Daryl.” She lowers her hands to her towel and removes it before doing the same to mine.   
“Luc hmmmm.” She is rubbing, with her finger tips, at the sensitive flesh near my dick. Arching her back she pushes her ass on to my cock and is rewarded with a growl. I can feel her moving her hips and my hands move to them.   
“Daryl take me.” She bends forward and holds onto the door. She looks back at me and pushes herself back. I open her legs a bit before I line up with her entrance. Moving in slow I can hear her low moan. I growl when I can’t go any further. “Daryl please.”   
I move slowly at first, just enjoying the feeling of this new position with her. She pushes her hip back and moves her legs together.  
“Oh fuck.” She so fucking tight now. I can’t contain any of my moans anymore and I let them all out as I push myself in and out of her. I didn’t think she could get any tighter but when she cums, oh god I almost cum then. Pulling out I cum over her back gaining a little squeak from her.   
She pulls herself up and turns to look at me. She frowns before going to the bathroom. I lay down on the bed knackered after what we had just done and am asleep before she comes back in. 

 

“Luc where are ya.” She was just here. She handed me this baby and then was just gone. Where did she go. The baby looks up at me and reaches out for my finger, clutching it with all of it strength. Fuck where did she go. I have no clue what to do with a baby. I don’t want to be a shitty parent like my dad. No child deserves that.   
“Lucy where are ya!” I call out again but still nothing. I can see a light coming from the distance and decide to head that way hoping to find her.   
“LUCY!” I’m really panicking now cause the light isn’t getting any closer no matter how quick I move.   
“Daryl.” Thank fuck. I whip round hoping to see her standing there but she not.   
“Daryl!” It feels like I’m in the middle of an earthquake.   
“DARYL!” I sit up quickly realising I’m covered in sweat. Lucy is sat to the side of me looking worried. I pull her into my lap and bury my head into her neck surrounded with her hair. She strokes mine as my breathing slows down.   
“Daryl did you have a nightmare?” All I can do is nod. “Do you want to talk about it?”   
“I lost ya. Ya handed me a bub and just disappeared.” I wrap my arms around her tightly.   
“So is that why you pulled out.” I hear her whisper. “Daryl I’m not going anywhere. I promise. I won’t be anywhere your not.” She pushes me back onto the bed and crawls beside me, covering us with a blankets. She faces me and place a her hand on my chest. “Daryl.”   
“hmmm.” I’m feeling sleepy again and my eyes have started to close. I’m not sure if what I hear next is real or not. But my whole body hopes that she did say it. 

“Marry me?”


	19. Chapter 19

Lucy’s pov 

 

I don’t know why I said it then but after hearing his dream I knew than I wanted to be with him in every way possible. I sit up and look down at him sleeping. Yes he was reckless and wild but I always hated predictable guys. I reach up and brush the hair away from his face. He sighs but doesn’t wake. Leaving him was the worse mistake I have ever made and I will continue to pay for it.   
Crawling away from him I reach for some clothes and throw them on. Heading down stairs for a drink I see someone stood at the door. Who would be here this late. Opening the door I see it’s Rick.   
“Is Daryl awake?” he says it while barging past me. He hasn’t spoken to me since I got back. He has also refuses to look my way.   
“No he’s not. Rick what’s up it’s the middle of the night?”   
“I need to speak to him about something.”   
“Maybe I could help you.” He looks at me then like he only just realised who he was talking to.   
“No you can’t. This is to do with Negan and you can’t help.” He’s actually talking to me like I’m dirt. “He needs to die and I’m not sure you can handle that.” I walk up to him standing in front of him, pulling myself to my full height. He still has to look down at me, so annoying being so fucking short.  
“You don’t know what I can handle. So maybe let me make that decision before you try and degrade me. Yeah?” he takes a step back. He needs to realise I’m not just a little girl who needs looking after. I may of acted that way this past week but that’s not who I am.   
“I still need to talk with him.”   
“Well try again at dawn, he’ll be up by then.” He only nods at me before leaving. I hate how cold he has become with me. Ever since we got attacked by James and the garbage people he’s been distant with everyone but his immediate group. We are all told to just get on and find supplies.   
“Fuck them all.” I go in the kitchen and grab the hidden bottle of whisky I have and a glass. I sit down on the sofa and pore one finger in the glass and down it, smiling as I feel the burn as it goes down my throat. I pore another before reaching for the pen and pad on the table. I need to right down some plans so I can see them, looking for any flaws they might have. I need this to be perfect I close my eyes and think about my brother and everything he would do in these scenarios. I cross off everything that won’t work. I am left with two options, both require the kingdom.   
“Fuck!” I bow my head with my eyes closed, throwing the note pad on the table knocking my glass to the floor.   
“Well that was graceful” I jump as Daryl puts his hands on my shoulders, massaging my muscles in slow circles. “What ya doin it’s early.” I look at the window and see that the sun is rising.  
“Rick will be here soon to talk with you.” I stand up and grab my glass and bottle and clean the glass before putting them away. When I look back I can see Daryl looking at the pad.   
“Ya thought of everythin. Right down to who would be killed first.” He looks up at me with panic in his eyes. I don’t think he realised just how much I think like James. I walk over to him and take the pad throwing it back on the table.   
“I can’t have anything go wrong with this. He will try and kill us all if he is giving the chance.” He looks back down at the pad.   
“Why is my name written in every plan.”   
“Cause he will kill you first cause he thinks your the reason I’m fighting for this side.” I go to walk away but he pulls me back.   
“If I die in every plan why are ya takin me?”   
“ Because I need you there, that’s why. I will kill him, before he has the chance, if I see him make a move towards you.”   
“I don’t want ya to go alone but wouldn' it be best if ya do.” I shake my head at him.   
“I need you there to keep me grounded.” He doesn’t know how easy it is for me to flip the switch back to being Lucille. He puts a finger under my chin and raises my head up so I look at him. I can see happiness and sadness in his eyes. He bends down and kisses me softly.   
“Ya won’t lose me Luc. I’ll be wherever ya are.” I smile up at him before jumping as the door bangs loudly. I pick up the pad as Daryl answers the door.   
“Good you’re up brother. We need to see Ezekiel. I have a plan and I need the kingdom’s help.” Rick looks past Daryl and into my eyes. I can hear Daryl beginning to say no.   
“That’s fine. I’ll come with, I need to speak to him as well. Might as well let him know I’m not the devil anymore.” I smile at Daryl before grabbing a bag and putting supplies init. Moving past them both I grab my bow. I see Michonne near the car.   
“You coming too?” she smiles at me as I put my bag in the boot.   
“ Yup but don’t expect a warm welcome when they see me.” She frowns at me as I climb in the seat behind the drivers side. I rest my head back and wait. Hopefully I can get a bit of sleep before we get there. I might have to get ready to run. I hope that he can find some forgiveness within himself but you never know. I was I bitch to him and his people.   
Daryl slides in next to me and places his crossbow on his lap. Pulling me towards him I rest me head on his shoulder and hear Rick chuckle in the front.   
“Last time you were in the back it was with Jesus.” He laughs a bit more and I feel Daryl stiffen beside me.   
“Yeah I heard about that from him actually. You were really mean to him.” I look up at him as he looks at me. “You really hurt him, my poor Jesus.” I laugh as soon as his face turns into a frown.   
I rest my head back on his shoulder and put my arm around his waist. Things turn quiet and I quickly fall sleep. 

 

I wake with a start in an empty car. Where have they gone. The car is parked in front of the old school in the kingdom. There’s no-one around. I look all around before reaching for the door handle. As the door opens a crack it is pushed back closed with a big orange paw. I look up and see Shiva baring her teeth at me. Her roar is loud and makes me cover my ears. 

 

“Luc wake up.” I’m sweating bad and I’m laying across the back seat. I reach out for Daryl and he takes my hand moving his thumb in small circles on the back of it.   
“Where did you go.” I whisper.   
“We’re here. Rick and Michonne have walked up to let them know yer here.” I can hear the worry in his voice. Sitting up I stretch as well as I can and pull myself out of the car. I grab my stuff and start walking towards the kingdom with Daryl walking just behind me.   
We reach the gate and every single guard points their guns at me. I pass my weapons to Daryl and pull out a bit of rope from my pocket.   
“Tie my hands and make it tight.” I say it loud enough for them all to hear. Daryl looks at me frowning. “ Do it please this is the only way they will let me in.” He nods and ties my hands. “tighter!”   
“If I do it any tighter y'all end up hurtin yerself.”   
“She needs to be tied very tight before she comes in.” One of them say. I don’t know what one cause I keep my eyes down. It sound like the guy who got in my way and I has to teach him a lesson in manners.   
Once my hands are bound I hear the gate open.   
“Oh Lucille I didn’t think we would see the day you would be here again.” Ezekiel comes out with Rick and Michonne on either side of him. “What could you possible want here.”   
“I need some help with something and only you can help me your highness.” He looks surprised at the fact I’m asking nicely. I know I was harsh with them but it’s only now I’m realising just how bad I was.   
“Allow her entry. We shall see what she has to say.” I bow my head to him as a thank you before moving forward. We all head to the school and I can feel my heart beating fast. If this goes wrong I may end up being kept prisoner for coming back here.   
One of the guards sit me down in one of the front seats in the auditorium. I look up to see Ezekiel sit down in his chair next to Shiva. She looks at me and purrs, trying to walk my way.   
“Would we be able to talk alone please your highness. What I have to say is a private matter.” He shoos everyone away but Daryl refuses to leave my side. I look up at him and he growls before leaving muttering as he goes.   
“What is it you would like Lucille my time is precious.” I can tell he’s angry but I am surprised at how calm he is being.   
“I need to meet with Negan to organise a sort of truce so we can still scavenge without the fear of being killed while doing so. I need your help with this so we can make sure all of our community stay alive even though we are in the middle of a war.” He looks at me before calling me closer. Shiva moves uneasily trying to get to me. “I know what I did and I am paying for it. I think about it all the time and I am now trying to atone for it. If you want me to leave and not come back I understand but no matter what ypu decide, know that I will be helping you from afar.” I look down and wait for him to make a decision.   
I stare at my hands moving my wrists. I can see blood from the friction burns already there. As I look at it I feel like I need more than just my hands tied. I should be locked away for what I did to him alone. I killed his wife Claire the last time I was here. She was so brave to have stood up to me while I was on a rampage. It was after this I moved around and made all the women get down on their knees and dared any of them to try what she had. That’s when one of the women rushed up to me holding her child begging me to stop.   
Being here is bring back too much. I can feel my silent tear falling down my face and landing on my hands.   
“I shall help you but it will take some time before you are welcome here again. My people need to learn to trust you. I can see you have changed in such a short time. I don’t feel like the name you have is the one you use anymore. What shall we be calling you from here on out.?” I look up at him and wipe my face.   
“Lucy is what I go by now.”   
“Such a nice name Lucy, it suits you much better. Come here.” I walk up to him and he pulls out a knife. He raises my arms before cutting into the rope. “I must say Daryl did a good job tiring you up. Was it his idea?” I shake my head.   
“No that was mine. I didn’t want to seem like anymore of a threat than what you already though I was. I knew for you to listen to me I needed to be vulnerable.” I rub my wrists and feel Shiva’s hot breath on my side.   
“I think she missed you. She may of been the only one here to have liked you.” He smiles at me not meaning to offend me. I nod at him.   
“As I missed her. She really is a beautiful animal.” I put my arm out to her and feel her push her head against it.   
“You know the only other outsider that has managed to get this close to her is Daryl. Even though she was locked up she let him touch her, just like she did with you.” I smile while looking at her.   
“It doesn’t surprise me. Other than me she is a good judge of character.”   
“I’m not so sure anymore. Maybe she knew all along who you were, even before you did.” He’s body language changes. “I thought about setting her on you once. It was just after you killed Claire. The thing that changed my mind was your face when Linda was on her knees in front of you. I saw a flicker of doubt. I have been waiting ever since for you. I just wasn’t sure what I would be faced with when you did turn up.” He smiles at me. “I’m glad it’s this you I face today, an ally.” I wipe more tears away before speaking.   
“Thank you for giving me a chance to make it better Ezekiel.” Before I can say more Daryl come storming in.   
“I’ve given ya enough time. Ya done yet?” he is shouting and Shiva looks over to him and growls quietly. He pauses when he sees where I am and move slowly towards me. I turn my back on Shiva still keeping my hand on her head, moving it slowly to calm her down.   
“We’re fine in here. I would of come get you when we were done.” I smile at him as he reaches me, not getting too close because of Shiva. I can feel she has bared her teeth to him. Looking back at her, it’s not aggressively but more like a smile. “Seems we have a friend in common.” He looks worried but still managed to smile, even if it was briefly.   
“What are your plans Lucy. When shall you be meeting with the saviour’s.” I turn to look at Ezekiel.   
“I plan on meeting with Negan soon and I wish for you to be there. You can bring 4 guards with you for protection. It will be on neutral ground somewhere between all of the community. I need you to also decide the meeting place. Rick is not to know that this meet is happening. He will be told of the results though.” He looks surprised for a moment before nodding his head.  
“Shall we say in 3 days it shall happen. Gives us all time to organise.” He walks away with Shiva before even waiting for a reply. “I shall sort accommodation for you.” With that he leaves. 

 

We are escorted to a room in the school away from the residents. One of the guards open the door for me and lightly push me in. They don’t trust me and I don’t retaliate. I just look back at them with a straight face. Their king might be starting to trust me but it doesn’t mean they do. They start to close the door.   
“What the fuck ya think ya doin?” Daryl pushes past them and into the room. I put my hand on his arm to calm him down.   
“They still think of me as a threat. It’s fine. They want me in here alone. Go with them. Nothing can happen to me in here.” He looks down at me and shakes his head.   
“I ain’t leavin ya.”   
“Yes you are. They need to keep me away from everyone. You included. Trust me. I’ll be okay.” I push him out of the door . They close the door and lock it. I hear 2 pairs of footsteps leave. There will be a guard on the door all night. I undress already tired leaving my top and pants on I climb in the bed. Smiling I think of Daryl and how he will be complaining all night. I pull the other pillow to my chest and cuddle it pretending that it is Daryl and fall asleep. 

 

Shit someone’s kicking down the door. I reach out for my knife only to realise it’s not there. The banging continues and I look for somewhere to hide. As i pull my trousers on i see that under the bed is blocked and there are no wardrobes. I look in all of the draws in the room and come up empty handed. The door swings open and I see the man from the gate. He charges forward and pins me against the wall.   
“You haven’t changed. No-one can change from who you are. Sick and twisted little bitch.” He punches me in the side and if he wasn’t holding me up I would of crumbled.   
“You killed the queen just for sticking up for us against you and your soldier's.” He punches me again and let’s me fall to the floor with a bang. I can see black dots in my vision. Shit he’s going to kill me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't posted in a few days. No excuse really, just got a bit distracted by some other story's. 
> 
> I am currently up to chapter 22 and still have to edit them so I will try and get them out to you all. 
> 
> Let me know if you are liking to story so far. Would love to hear your opinions. :)
> 
> Until next time :D


	20. Chapter 20

I was curled up on the floor accepting ever hit like I deserved it. He shouted so loud I’m surprised no-one heard. He kept going for almost 10 minutes before someone came.   
“Get the fuck off her!” I look up and see Carol moving to stand in front of me. In the hall was the guard who escorted me to the room. He was smirking at me as he walked past. Fucking dick told him where I was and left his post. Carol reaches down for me but I brush her off. Standing shakily I push past them both and head to a room I know no matter what I will be safe.

 

I lay down in the middle of the cage with Shiva head on my stomach. I stoke her head lulling her to sleep again. I ran here as fast as could ignoring the pain and any looks I was getting. I needed to be safe from all of them. I feel her growl before I hear the footsteps.   
“You should really be seen by the doctor. You might have some broken bones.” It was Carol. I don’t know how she knew where I would go. She doesn’t even know me that well.   
“Where’s Daryl?” I remember the look he gave me before I closed the door. He’s not going to be happy one bit.   
“He took a trip to hilltop. Ezekiel told me that you are planning to meet with Negan in 3 days. He went to talk with Maggie. He said he would try and be back before dawn.” Makes sense that he would go. I’m not even sure how I would of worded it. “Can you come out please so we can get you checked over.”   
“No I’m fine. I just want to be here until Daryl gets back and then I can leave.” I even sound like I have given up. I can hear her sighing. “Look I thought I would be safe in there. I was told I would be. But at lest here I can guarantee that the only ones that can hurt me is myself and Shiva. Can you just go. I don’t have anything else to say.” Shiva lifts her head and quietly growls at Carol , getting up she moves towards her and sits in her line of sight.   
I curl up on my side when Carol leaves. Resting my head on my arm I feel Shiva curling up behind me, her head level with mine. I listen to her breathing and feel the heat coming off of her. It strange that a vicious animal, one that could turn on me before i even had a chance to act, would bring me as much comfort as Daryl would. In my mind I know why I came straight here, I didn’t know where he would be. I roll over and put my arm on Shiva’s side slowly and hear her purr. 

 

I wake with a start wondering where I am before looking up to find Shiva standing over me protectively a quiet rumble coming from her chest. I look over to the gate and see the guards from last night, Ezekiel and Carol.   
“I think you need to apologise to this girl now. She is a guest of the king and not the person you seem to think she still is.” Carol pushes them forward so they are right up against the bars.  
“Don’t fucking bother. They didn’t know and thought I was a threat. Just know next time I won’t just let you beat me. No matter what person I am , I don’t stand for it.” I crawl out from under Shiva and sit up. I pat her on the back so she sits too. “Its ok girl. They are still friends.” She looks round to me before laying down with her head in my lap. I stoke her head as I look back up at them. Carols the first one to speak.   
“We haven’t told anyone what happened. We want you to decide what to do. We don’t stand for this here.” I know what she wants me to do, but how will that prove to them that I’ve changed. I look to Ezekiel and he is watching, waiting for me to prove myself.   
“Just put them back to work. Lives are important now. No point in wasting life for something that was obviously a mistake. Just keep them away from me.” I can hear their sighs of relief.   
“Can we get you checked over now?” Carol try again with me. I stand up and go to the gate. She opens it for me and I get out. Shiva looks up at me before laying down again.   
“I just want my things and to go.” I turn to Ezekiel. “3 days. Can you mark on a map where we are meeting so I can take it to Maggie please.” He nods at me and produces a map from his pocket. I know I look surprised right now.   
“I had a feeling you would want to leave so I brought it with me. Know that if you do come again you shall be safe.”   
“I know I will. This will be my room.” I point back at the cage and he smiles at me nodding his head.   
“Are you sure you don’t need anyone to look you over.” Carol tries once more. I start walking off towards the room I was in to get my stuff.  
“No I’m fine. I’ve been beaten for years. I know what broken bones feel like.” 

 

After I have my stuff I make my way to the gate and someone hands me my weapons. Daryl must of left them here for me just in case. I pull out a note and hand it to him.   
“If anyone with a crossbow and long brown hair comes here, give this to him please.” He only nods at me before ordering them to open the gates. I walk out and hope I can find a car. 

 

The journey takes half of the day but I get there eventually. I did find a car only for it to crap out on me 5 miles from hilltop. My lip kills and my sides hurt but it’s only bruises, maybe a few little cuts. I walk up to the gates and they open before I get to them. Daryl comes running out and as soon as I see him I can feel the tear welling up in my eyes.   
“What fuckin happened to ya.” I shake my head at him unable to tell him. I just pull him in wrapping my arms around his middle, hiding my face in his chest.   
“Just I wasn’t as safe as I should of been. It’s fine though it’s only superficial and will heal. I’m just happy to be here with you.” He strokes my hair but I can feel the rage rolling off of him. I hug him tighter forcing him to stay and not run off. “I need to sit down.” It’s all he needs to hear and he pulls away. I walk in front of him ignoring all of the looks I’m getting. I reach the house and the door opens.   
“Shit what happened to you.” I smile at Maggie before I hug her.   
“Nothing I didn’t deserve.” I whisper to her and she pulls away to look at me.   
“Jesus is here. He turned up yesterday. He doesn’t like this plan you have, but I see how it could benefit us all. Do you think you can get it to work?”   
“Yes I do and I also have the meeting place. I just need to get cleaned up and go to the sanctuary. Did Daryl tell you that whoever goes will need 4 guards?”   
“Yes he did and I have picked them. I will be there.” I look at her surprised and shake my head.   
“You can’t. You’re pregnant. I won’t allow it.” She smiles at me.   
“I’m going cause I’m now the leader here. I understand why Rick can’t go but you can’t stop me.” I shake my head but don’t say anything. She walks me through to one of the bathrooms and leaves to get me some clothes. I turn the water on and strip. Getting under the water I can feel the sting from the cuts on my lip. I wash quickly and get out. Daryl is holding a towel out to me and I take it.   
“Ya gonna tell me why ya said ya deserved it.” He sneers at me. I don’t say anything and I dry and dress as quick as I can being careful not to wince as I bend. I can tell he’s watch my every move and looking at all of the forming bruises. If make out I'm in pain it will only set him off more. I go to move past him but he stops me. “I need to know Luc. Why are ya punishin yerself.”   
“Because I do deserve it. I was a bitch and have killed more than Negan has. You all see him as the big bad wolf. Where do you think he learnt it from. I may of changed but it doesn’t take back what I have done.” I lower my head and look at his shoes. “Daryl I was such a shitty person that maybe I don’t deserve forgiveness. But I won’t stop until Negan is either dead or locked away. It’s what should of been done with me.” He lifts my head up and wipes my tears away.   
“Well ya better hope this all works. Cause if it does they’ll all love ya.” I smile at him knowing that this small thing won’t atone for it all. Yes it’s a start but it won’t make them forgive everything I did.  
I take his hand and move out of the room dragging him behind me. As I’m leaving I walk into Jesus. He frowns down at me.   
“You went to the kingdom didn’t you.” I nod at him knowing what he’s thinking. I smile before I answer.   
“Could of been worse I suppose. Turned out quite well really.” He can’t help but smile at me.   
“Lucy you really have a strange way of thinking.” I laugh at him before I remember Daryl behind me. “Do you have some of the long range weapons here?”   
“Yeah what do you need.”   
“Take Daryl to them at let him choose. I need to get a car and some supplies.” I push Daryl over to Jesus before turning from them. 

 

I wait sat on the car for Daryl. When I see him I can’t help but smile. He has the gun and doesn’t look to happy that he can’t take his crossbow. I wait until we are heading off in the car before I speak.  
“This will take less than an hour. Well be back before you know it.” He only grunts my way which makes me smile more. We drive there silently and when we reach the building that has the most view of the sanctuary I point to where I will be.   
“I’m going to stand in the middle of the gate and wait for someone to come out.” I put a finger under his chin, making him look at me. “If it’s Dwight don’t shoot him. We need him.” He grunts again but nods. “You’ll be able to hear it all over the walkies. I will keep mine on.” I kiss him before I leave.   
Heading up to the gate I can feel my heart beating hard. Ignoring it as best as I can I bang on the gate and wait.


	21. Chapter 21

Daryl's pov 

 

I don’t like this. She’s so small against the background. She’s just been beaten and yet she is here in a place that might have been told she's fair game. Her voice comes through the walkie as she walks up to the gate.   
“Daryl, stop worrying. I’ll be fine.” How does she know what I’m thinking even when she not near me. I shake my head and look back through the scope. Within a minute a woman comes out to her.   
“I would like to see one of Negan’s lieutenants.” The way she says it is so cold and demanding even I feel a shiver climb up my back. “Now would be nice.” Her woman turns and speaks into her walkie.   
“Miss Negan wants to speak to you.” It takes seconds before 4 guys stand in front of her behind the gate. One of them is Dwight.   
“Hello all. Such a nice welcome.”   
“What do you want Lucille. Negan’s not happy you left again.” Dwight says, even though the words mean one thing he says it with respect.   
“You always get to the point don’t you Dwight.” He smile slightly at her. Fucking creep. “I would like to arrange a meeting. Not here and not at any of the community. We will all go here.” She passes the map through. “Tell him he can bring 4 men or women, what ever he wishes, but no more than that. All of the leaders will do the same.”   
“Will Rick be there Miss Negan?” one of the other speak. They all have so much respect for her it’s amazing.   
“No my sweet Simon. I didn’t think that would do any of us any good.” I can see her fingers raise up to the man and he puts he’s hand on the gate so she can touch them. Was he her lover while she was here. Or is he just like Jesus, a friend. I shake my head again. I'll just have to ask her later.   
“Will you wait here while we tell Negan.” Wait what, tell him shouldn’t that be a ask him. How much power over them did she have here. I watch as they all step away towards the doors and I see Negan standing just the other side. If he would just come out a little further I could end this now. I see Lucy shaking her head my way. She really does know me too well. They all walk back to her.   
“He says that’s fine. When will the meeting happen?” she looks at Dwight   
“In three days time. At noon. Don’t be late!” With that she walks away, never looking my way. As soon as I lose sight of her I pack up and meet her at the car. 

 

She is sat on the bonnet again with her head in her hands.   
“Are ya okay?” I stand in front of her and she raises her head.   
“Yeah I just wasn’t expecting to see him. Can we go now?” her eyes are red but there are no tears. She is shaking and I think it’s from anger. I nod at her and she moves round to the passenger side. Climbing in after her I set off towards hilltop. We drive for awhile before she speaks. Well shouts.   
“Stop. Now!” I pull the car over to the verge and she gets out. She walks off into the wood. I jump out after her abandoning the car.   
“Luc were ya goin.” I can see her trail and it's as straight as can be. Like she knows where she’s going. I keep going and I soon come out near a little wooden cabin. The door is open, I walk in and find her sorting through the things on the sides.  
“This was my place when I left the sanctuary. I made this place my home after I was kicked out of hilltop. I would only leave if I had to and never for to long.” She turns and looks at me. “When Aaron found me I though of this place. During the first few weeks I forgot, well who couldn’t. I had a bed, showers and a working kitchen. It took awhile before I was longing for this little house again.” She comes and stands in front of me.   
“Why ya tellin me this?” I don’t mean it the way it comes out. I just want to know why were out here, it’s gonna be dark soon.   
“I wanted to bring you here because I always think of this place when I look at you.” I frown at her. I’m confused, how am I like a small cabin in the woods. She shakes her head at me. “I don’t mean it like you are the house. I mean this place was home for me, it was warm and welcoming anytime I needed it. You are now like that for me Daryl.” She wraps her arms behind my neck as I pull her flush against me. “I love you.” She kisses me before I can say anything and guides me to the blankets she had set up on the floor.   
She lays down and pulls me down on top of her. I rest my weight on my hands as we make out. Her hands are pushing my shirt up and she stokes the skin on my back, sending tingles straight to my groin. She pulls my hips down as she raises hers and moans. The friction feels amazing. I kiss and nip at her neck as she undoes my shirt. I nip her sweet spot and she throws her head back lifting her hips into mine. I can’t help but moan as we move, wanting more I sit up on my knees and pull her t-shirt off.   
The sight I see turns me off in a instant and she frowns at me before looking down at herself. She grabs her shirt and pushes me away before pulling it on.   
“I’m sorry I wasn’ there with ya.” She doesn’t look at me as she pulls out some tins from under the sink. Opening them she dumps them in a pan and goes outside. I stay there until I hear her sob.   
I go outside and find her sat near the fire stirring the food in the pan.   
“You know somehow I knew you weren’t there. I don’t know how but I just felt it. I don’t blame you for not being there, so don’t feel guilty. I knew what I was getting myself into by going there.” I can’t help the anger I feel as she says that. I pick her up and make her face me, griping her maybe a little to tight, not letting her move.   
“Why didn' ya tell me. I would never of left if ya hadn’ of said yer'd be fine. All I try and do is keep ya safe and ya keep tellin me to leave.” She lowers her head. “Na Lucy. Look at me.” She whips her head up and I hear the click.   
“I told you to go then to keep you safe. You don’t think I know what you would of done if you were there. Fucking hell Daryl you would of killed him. I deserved what I got. I’m just as annoyed as you that they actually did it.” She try’s to pull away but I don’t let her. “I killed their people and you think I would be welcomed back with open arms. No. I’m just lucky they didn’t shoot me on sight.” She takes a breath to calm herself down.   
“Why do ya keep ya past to yerself. If ya don’t tell me stuff how am I meant to keep ya safe?” I loosen my grip on her arms but don’t let go.   
“I don’t tell you these things because I don’t want to relive them. I’ve said it before, James is just a child when it comes to what he does. He’s not as calculated as you think. He’s just copying what he has seen.” She pulls away from me again and I let her. Does she mean that he learnt what to do from her. That can’t be right. She is so caring and kind to everyone. I know she’s done stuff she ain’t proud of, but hell we all have. I watch her dish up the food and she passes me one of the bowls before eating her own. 

 

We decide to stay here for the night. She curls up on the blankets as I close the door. Putting one of the chairs in front of it so no-one or thing can get in. I contemplate sleeping on the chair but as I look over at her I decide not to. I lay down next to her and I feel her move slightly towards me.   
“Luc ya need ta trust me more.” I whisper more to myself than to her.   
“I do trust you but if I told you the things I have done I’m not sure you’ll ever trust me. My whole past is a minefield of shit upon more shit.” She rolls over to look at me. I can see the outline of her face in the moonlight. I pull a blanket over us as I see her shiver.   
“My life ain’t been sunshine and roses either.” She smiles at me for what seems like the first time in ages.   
“I know it hasn’t. I've heard you while you sleep. I’ve seen the scars. You managed to go through so much but still hold on to the good things about you. I didn’t. I broke and forgot who I was for awhile. I turned myself into a monster, one that anyone would want to kill.”   
She’s silent for awhile and I think she asleep until I feel her shift and clear her throat. “I know you saw me touch Simon’s hand today. Why haven’t you asked me about it?”   
“I was waitin till we were away from there. No point arguing about a guy when he’s only a few yards away.” I see her smile again and she sits up. Sitting up with her I pull my cigs from my pocket. I haven’t smoked in front of her yet. I don’t know why I haven’t really. She holds her hand out for one and I pass it to her. She runs her fingers along it before lighting it and taking a long pull. Breathing it out she sighs.   
“Still as good as I remember.” She takes another pull before speaking again. “Do you remember the cell you were in and that fucking god awful song?” how could I ever forget. Day upon days of dog food and that song. Only being let out to work. I nod at her.   
“I did the same to Simon. I liked the look of him. Strong, reliable but he had a weakness. He didn’t listen to me. Thinking just because I was a woman I wasn’t the reason so many people were still alive. So I locked him away until he understood I was the one he took orders from. I did a lot more than just what happened to you. I tortured him. Using his fears against him until he was how I wanted him. It turned out I did my job too well and now he will only answer to a Negan.”   
“If he’s that loyal to ya why didn’t he leave with ya?” I can’t help but think back on my time there more. Is that what he was doing to me. Trying to make me into a subdued person ready to do anything he said.   
“Daryl. I know what your thinking and that’s why I tried to get you out. As soon as I heard you had been taken it took all I had not to run to you straight away.” She puts her cig out and puts her hand on my arm. “He wouldn’t leave the first time because I needed to be away from any living person. I couldn’t trust myself anymore. It got to a stage I would kill someone if the looked at me strangely.” She turns towards me and I look down at her. “He didn’t come with me the second because he’s afraid of us. All of us. He knows what he has done and knows if any of them catch him he will pay for it with his blood. It was the only time I saw him truly scared.”   
“So ya tellin me that the man you made and worships the ground ya walk on is afraid of Rick.”   
“Not just Rick. All of us. Especially me, I know where to hit him. If he stays with James no-one will know the real him. Yes I don’t want him to die but he has made his choice as I have made mine.” She sits up on her knees so our eyes are level. “Are you going to run now?”   
I can’t condemn her for anything she has done. I remember what Maggie told me but I don’t think she knows I know about it.   
“Na yer the same old Lucy to me.” I smile at her and pull her towards me. She rests her for head on mine before sighing.   
“I love you Daryl.”   
“I love ya too Lucy. Come on we should get some sleep. I want to leave early and get prepped for the meet.”   
She lays down beside me and I pull her close, holding her tight as we both slept.


	22. Chapter 22

Lucy’s pov

 

The past two days have flown by. I tried to avoid Rick as much as possible. Daryl had chosen the people to come with us and I wasn’t happy. Michonne, yeah sure that’s fine. Rosita also fine, she has a burning need to kill James but she is able to hold back. But Carl. To say we didn’t argue over that would be a huge lie. We even fought on the day we were leaving.   
“Daryl he’s just a kid.” I’m trying my hardest to be calm but it’s impossible. I see what James sees in Carl. The way if he had him in he’s clutches, he would mould him into one of his best killers.   
“Luc he overheard me talkin with Rosita. What did ya expect me to do. Tell him he's a kid and that he can’t come. That kids been through so much let him have this one”   
“That’s exactly what you should of done. He is a kid who has had to grow up too fast. I understand he wants to help but this isn’t how. Things could go very wrong today.” I shake off the feeling of dread I have in my stomach.   
“He’ll be an asset to us. Just give him a chance.” He’s talking calmly to me. I know what he’s doing. Trying to get me to think that it will all turn out how I planned it. He’s standing so close to me I can smell him. My knees have started to weaken. Fucking man has me wrapped around his fingers and he doesn’t even know it.   
“Fine. But I still don’t like it.” He smiles victoriously at me and I turn away grabbing my bag. I leave my bow behind, I will need my hands free just in case. I get the bat as an after thought.   
Heading out the door I can see them all near the truck. They all get in as we get close. I choose to sit in the back as Daryl drives. I need to think. James will have a back up plan, I just know it. There will be more of us than of him and he knows it. The only reason he’s doing this is because I’m his sister. 

 

 

As we park I take a good look at the location. It’s a lone building in the middle of a field. The trees are good distance away that even a sharp shot will have some difficulty. I walk ahead of the others and open the door surprised to see we are the last ones to get here. I shake hands with the people I do know and nod at the ones I don’t as I walk past. James is stood near the table grinning at me, watching every little movement I make, trying to decide what it is I want with all of these people here. I stand the other side of the table and we stare each other down, waiting for the other to make the first move. I can see the impatients in his eye, I was always better at this than him. I can’t help the slight lifting of my lips, pathetic brother just give in like you always do. 

“Ahh dear Lucille. Do you have my bat?” I throw it down on the table between us but keep my hand on it. He jumps back a little a bit shocked at my action, it wasn’t something he expected me to do, I didn’t myself really. My heart is pumping way to fast with him here, flashes of everything he has done pass my eyes.

“Just remember yourself dear brother, I gave you this bat. It’s more mine than it will ever be yours.” He flinched back a little but keeps his shit eating grin on his face. 

“Why have you call all these lovely people here.” He gestures to the room and everyone takes a step forward, they all don't know him as well as I do, he’s trying to hide his fear behind this ‘big man’ act. I can feel myself starting to shake and Daryl put a hand on my side. Looking over at him I can see he’s telling me to calm down. I close my eyes and breath. Once I open them I feel a calm I’ve never felt before, like those few deep breathes have cleansed my whole body.

“This war is going to get everyone killed. We all need to be able to hunt and scavenge just to eat. Most of us are self sustaining but some aren’t. Not in the way we should be by now.” He looks a bit taken back, was he really expecting a fight. Ezekiel and Maggie have come to stand next to me to reinforce the ‘we’. The three leaders out of four communities, I start to feel a little guilt that Rick isn’t here, this is his job, not mine. 

“So what are you suggesting.” He knows I mean business. He’s not trying to push my buttons anymore. The whole room relaxes a bit. I wasn’t expecting him to give this easily, in all of these years he has fought me on everything, even my right to live my life how I want to. 

“ Only a team of 4 is allowed to go out at any given time. If fired upon then it is seen as an act of war. You will not come to the community’s and we won’t come to yours. That will be seen as an act of war. You will call back all of the outposts that don’t produce food, and leave them empty. So do we have a deal?” Daryl takes my hand to help me keep calm, I squeeze it back to let him know I’m fine. This interaction doesn’t escape James’s eyes though, he looks between us both and realises something, maybe even confirm something he already knew.

“Why should I agree to this. I lose out.” I sigh before speaking, is he really this bend on killing Rick and his loved ones to not realise one simple fact.

“You will because the only resource left on this plant that is running out is humans. If we are to survive then people still need to live. That’s why.’ He smiles at me. I know he’s thinking back to when I was a child and forced him to play by my rules. He did then I don’t see why he can’t now too. 

“Fine.” He stands up and pulls Simon towards him. “I have a gift for you.” He pushes him towards me and I can feel everyone stiffen. Everyone but Daryl. They all took a step back and raised their guns at him, Daryl stayed firmly at my side looking down at me.   
“  
Why now?” I look at them both looking for the reason. 

“I made a mistake Miss Negan. I should of come with you when you offered.” Simon looks at me sadly. 

“You know what this means. They'll lock you up. That’s not much of a life.” I can see my vision blurring. It will fuck this man up more than I already have. James speaks up interrupting him. 

“Just take him. He’s of no use to me anymore. He was always yours anyway.” He turns to leave. What the fuck is that about. He has control over every man and woman in that place, why is Simon any different.

“I won’t see you again James.” He turns back and stands in front of me. Pulling me in for a hug he bends to my ear. 

“I’m proud of you little sister.” A tear falls down my   
cheek and I hug him back. He will always be my big brother and I hope that I’m not the one who has to end his life.

He pulls away, grabbing the bat off the table before he leaves. Simon touches my arm and everyone reacts, pushing him away from me. Carl pulls his gun out and trains it on him. Daryl is the only one that stays right by my side without his crossbow raised, I had told him about everything I did to this man standing in front of me, how he would rather end his life than hurt me. 

“Sweet Simon. I need your weapons.” Everyone looks at me then. They don’t know that this is the only way I have ever spoken to him. That’s going to have to change, I can’t keep this act up, it’s muddling up who I was with who I am. But in this moment I know it’s the only way to get him to do what needs to be done.

“Yes Miss Negan.” He takes off his belt and holds it out towards me. Daryl takes them for me. Simon stares at the floor while the others talk. 

“This is not a good idea. Rick will flip and kill him if we take him back. Or worse if he thinks he has information.” 

“He can’t come to hilltop. The same thing will happen.” 

“The kingdom will not house such a monster.” 

“It doesn’t matter. He stays with me.” Everyone looks round to me as I tie Simon’s hands together. “Tight enough darling?” he nods at me. 

“You know Rick will kill him. Why would you risk it?” Michonne comes forward a bit but doesn't get too close. 

“He doesn’t know this meeting happened.” 

“Yes he does.” The whole room stills and I keep my head down focusing on the left over rope in my hands. I feel too guilty for not have told them this little fact, they all thought that he didn’t know and were told to keep it a secret. It may of started that way but things changed and now I have lied to them all. 

“What do ya mean he knows. Ya said he can’t know.” I feel even worse now. Lying to the others was easy, but with Daryl, especially now we had the whole no secrets thing now, it’s a whole different thing. I just hope he doesn’t hold this again me for too long.

“No Daryl I said he can’t come. Once you had told me who was coming I had to tell him.” 

“You told my dad just cause I was coming. Do you not trust me anymore Lucy.” Carl looks crushed. He’s the only one I look in the eye., I have to, he has to know this isn’t his fault, a parent needs to know where their child is.

“Its not that I don’t trust you, your dad needed to know you were coming. If something went wrong he would go mad. I felt too guilty the moment I found out you were coming.” I touch his arm. “Carl I trust you with my life. How could I not. But you are still a kid and your dad needed to know.” He shrugs his shoulders. 

“But why isn’t he here then. He would of demanded to be apart of this.” Rosita comes up in front of me. “What did you do to him?” Wow have I already lost their trust, they really think I could leave two children parentless, I know Rick only thinks Carl is biologically his but he doesn’t see what I see.

“I didn’t do anything. He knew why I was doing this and agreed with me. I know after everything you have just seen might make it a little hard to trust me now. I did this for all of us.” She huffs and walks out. Some of the others go with her. 

Maggie comes over and tugs on my arm. I lift my eyes to hers. “I still trust that you will do the right thing.” She smiles at me before walking out with her people. 

“I will take my leave. The kingdom will send Alexandria some supplies in the next few days.” 

“Thank you your highness.” He goes before leaving too. Carl walks out dragging Simon behind him. Simon looks back at me and all I can offer him is a small smile to say that he will be fine with them. 

“Ya sure don’ tell me much.” I look up and see Daryl smiling at me. I frown at him, surely he should be mad at me, withholding something like this. I just about register that he is still speaking. “Ya sure about Simon being home with ya. Won’ bring up bad memory’s will it.” 

“Sure it will but I’m hoping you’ll be there to remind me who I am now.” He pulls me towards him and lowers his head, his lips are just an inch away from mine. 

“Always.” My heart sores as he kisses me. It full of love and desire. Fuck I have missed this. I put my hands in his hair and pull him in closer. He grabs my hips and tilts them towards his. I arch my back for him and feel his already starting to become aroused, my fingers are tangled in his hair pulling him down harder, running my tongue along his bottom lip, begging for entry. He takes my hint and opens up for me, tangling his tongue with mine, the heat coming from his mouth makes my core burn with want.

 

A loud long beep sounds from outside making us jump apart. I can’t help but laugh. Straightening my clothes I look up at him doing the same, with a added blush on his face. I walk out and find Carl with his hand on the horn looking our way. Climbing in Michonne gives me a knowing look. 

“Get everything you needed.” She snorts at the end at Daryl’s face. I have never seen such a beautiful man with such a thunderous face. I giggle quietly as Michonne replicates it. 

“Ya two gonna keep taking the piss or are we gettin out of here.” Sitting up straight I look at his eyes in the rear view mirror. 

“No sir.” I see him shift slightly at my words. My bruises are still there but I combed through all of the houses and found a way to hide them. I was going to get my way tonight and teasing him was step one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes yet another cock block from me, but they will get to have some 'fun' soon. 
> 
> Let me know what you think so far, I have some chapters in reserve but they need fleshing out some. 
> 
> Until never time :)


	23. Chapter 23

The drive back doesn’t seem to take as long and we are home within an hour. I help Simon out of the back and guide him towards the apartments. The cell Morgan made is still here. It will have to be Simon’s home until we can figure out what to do with him.  
I let him in and sit him down on the camp bed. Pulling my bag off my back I pull out the water and the few bits of food I had in there and place them next to him. I pull my knife out of my belt and cut the rope.

“I will be back in the morning. Simon if you need me before then just tell whoever is on guard duty. Okay.” 

“Yes Miss Negan.” I sigh. That has to stop if he’s to have a normal life. 

“Simon you will need to start calling me by my name. You did it before and you can do it again.” 

“But I thought I would never see you again. Both times.” I crouch down in front of him getting in his line of sight. 

“I’m not the leader here and you have to use my name. I won’t ask anything from you unless I have to. Think of me as a friend now, not your boss.” 

“Okay Lucille.” He winces as he says it and I shake my head. 

“Its Lucy. That is not my name anymore, it belongs to the girl in the past.” He smiles at me.

“I think I can manage that Lucy. Has a much nicer ring to it anyway.” I can see the old him shining through. The one I thought I had crushed, it makes me grin to see that side of him again. 

“Good now get some rest. I’m not sure how things are going to go and you may need to be ready for anything.” He nods at me as I lock the gate. “Goodnight Simon.” 

“Goodnight Lucy.” He lays down and covers himself with the blanket. 

 

I rush up the steps to see Daryl waiting for me. He holds up a bag. I frown at him as I get closer. It the bag I hid my stuff in. Shit, why did he have to find it, I was supposed to be a surprise. My little way of getting what I want, some extra special attention, some relief for both of us. Bugger, I should of hidden it better, although what’s he doing going in the spare bedroom. 

“Did you look in it.” He nods but doesn't show any emotions, he just takes my hand and pulls me in the direction of the house. He drops my hand and the bag as we get through the door. I bend to pick it up.

“Na. Leave it there.” I feel a sudden run of heat head to my groin. Fuck is he pissed or not. All I know is that the way he’s acting right now is sexy as hell. He closes the door and walks off into the kitchen. I can hear him opening the cupboards and placing things down on the top. “Come in here.” 

I walk round and see my hidden whiskey and two glasses. A shot in both. He holds one out to me. I take it and down it loving the way it burns going down. When I open my eyes he’s closer to me and puts the other glass in my hand. I frown as he tilts it up making it known he wants me to drink it. 

“Don’ swallow.” I tip it back into my mouth and he instantly kisses me. Lifting me up, the liquid transfers into his mouth and I hear him swallow. “Whiskey has never tasted so good.” I support myself with my arms around his shoulders, my legs are wrapped around his waist, and push my hips into his. We both moan at the same time. An idea pop’s into my head, I need this and I hope he does too. 

“Daryl please.” I whisper as he’s kissing my neck, trying to muffle his own moan. He lets me down onto my feet only for me to drop to my knees. I pull on his belt and undo it, pulling his trousers and boxers down I let his cock free. I look up at him and lick my lips. I run my tongue along the underside before circling it around the head. I hold his hips still as I take his length into my mouth, pulling in my cheeks, I suck and pull my head back until I hear a satisfying pop. I return him to my mouth and continue my teasing until I feel him tug on my hair. He pulls me up so I’m standing in front of him. No, don’t stop me now, not again.

“Ya sure ya want this now.” His eyes are like a total eclipse, almost completely black. I nod at him, I’m stuck under the spell he has on me, I have never seen him look at me that way, he bends to take his boots and trousers off. I undo his shirt kissing his chest down as I go until I am on my knees again. I see his shirts fall on the floor as I take his cock back in my mouth. I don’t tease this time, taking him all the way into my mouth and down my throat. The moans he makes made me do the same. His hands fly to my hair as a warning that he's close. I grip his hips making it impossible for him to move. 

“Lucy. Oh shit.” He cums in my mouth, i collect every bit of his release but don't swallow it, I stand up. Stood in front of him I open my mouth to show him his cum, waiting for my order, he did say don’t swallow after all. He surprises me by kissing me and tasting himself. Pushing me up against the fridge he deepens the kiss more. He pulls away as if to gage my reaction. I pull him back to kiss him again, startled slightly as he picks me up and carrys me into the lounge placing me on the sofa. Only now have I noticed that the curtains are closed. Did he planned this. Was it before of after he found the bag. My thought are cut of as he crouches down pulling at the bottom of my top. I lift my arms so he can pull it off, I wait for him to react the same way he had in the cabin. 

He runs his fingers down my ribs, making me shiver, leaving soft little kisses in their wake. He reaches my hips and pulls them so my back is on the sofa. He slides my trousers, knickers and boots off. He starts kissing up my legs taking his time before running his tongue up my slit. My back arches off the sofa and he holds me back down. He circles his tongue on my clit until I can feel the pressure building within me. He inserts a finger in my pussy and I come unravelled letting it all go. 

“Daryl yes. Oh yes.” 

 

As I come down he rests his head on my chest and wipes my cheek. I hadn’t even realised I was crying. I pull him up and brush my lips over his, feeling his breath come out sharply. Feeling his erection returning I raise my hips ever so slightly so he can enter me. We move slowly together before he pulls me down on top of him. I start to move faster but he places his hands on my hips making me slow down again. 

“I missed ya Lucy. I need this slow.” He rests his head on my shoulder as we continue to move. I can feel the tears welling up again. I have never had anyone be so gentle with me, only this man. My arms wrap around his back and I trail my fingers up and down feeling every muscle as we move. His arms slide round my waist and hold me impossibly close, moaning my name as I feel him getting close. 

 

We stay like that while he comes down, I stroke his hair and can’t help but admire how soft it is. He nuzzles my neck and sends shivers down my spine. I stand and pull him up with me. Laying him down on the sofa I lay on top of him with my head on his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart. At some point he pulls a blanket over us and wraps his arms around me, making me warm. I can feel myself starting to drift off but I still hear every word he says. 

“Lucy with everythin ya gone through I don’t want ta scare ya away but ya gotta know, I will love ya for the rest of me life, never felt this way about anyone, ever..” He stops for awhile and I start to be lulled to sleep by the sound of his heart and the way he’s running his hand through my hair. That is until it seems to skip a beat and it make me wonder what he’s thinking. I don’t move not wanting him to know I’m awake. He speaks so quiet I have to strain to hear him.

“Luc I don’ know when I’ll be able to say this when ya awake, so I’m just gonna keep practicin while ya sleep. Even if I have ta keep doin it every night till I manage it.” He takes a shaky breath in and it makes me want to hold him tighter and let him know that I don’t need anything more than just him, that I could never need more than his love.

“I love you Lucille Negan. Will you marry me.” 

 

I can feel the tears in my eyes even though they are closed. My arms tighten round him automatically, I feel him stiffen. 

“Yes Daryl Dixon.” I only just manage to whisper out but I feel his body relax a bit, his hands pull me up to his face. 

“What ya say?” he frowning at me but I can see the hope in his eyes. I lean forward and press my lips to his gently before moving to his ear. 

“I said yes Daryl Dixon. I will marry you.” I can feel him smile as I say yes and it only grows bigger. I lean back and see the biggest smile I have ever seen on him. It makes my heart flutter knowing I’m the reason why. He study’s my face before pulling me in and kissing me. A kiss that is full of hopes and promises. I wrap my arms around his neck and bury my fingers in his hair, he sighs with contentment when I do. I straddle his lap and position his cock at my entrance, needing to be with him in anyway possible right now. His hands glide over my skin as I move, stopping only as he reaches my face again, pulling me in to kiss me again. I can feel myself getting closer so I put one of my hands between us and move my fingers in tight little circles on my clit. We cum at the same time, swallowing each others noises as we kiss. 

 

We don’t hear the noises outside or the sudden activity until someone bangs on the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Couldn't decide between this and her asking him again. Let me know if you think I made the right decision.   
> Until next time :)


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's a little long, just a warning before you read :)

Rick barges in and adverts his eyes when he sees us. I look down and see that the blanket is only just covering us, it’s mainly on the floor now. 

“Lucy. You are needed at the cell. Something has happened over there and he’s refusing to let anyone see to him. Daryl I need to you come with me. Hilltop has been attacked.” I can feel the atmosphere shift and I get up, picking my clothes up with me. I head into the kitchen to put them on. 

After I have finished I feel arms come around me and pull me flush against their warmth. My fingers link in with theirs holding tight, saying a quiet goodbye just like I do every time we are apart. Daryl bends down and whispers in my ear. 

“This ain’t goodbye love. I’ll be back before ya know it.” My shoulders relax just a bit at his words, but like always his embraces never seem to last long enough for me. I turn and watch him leave. He looks back at me and it seems like he’s trying to communicate with me. 

‘Don’t worry too much. He will be back.’   
I hope the voice in my head is right. Either that or he’s telling me ‘Don’t even think about leaving.’ 

 

 

I wait until I hear the cars leave before I head over to Simon. It’s still dark out, an hour or two before dawn, it has started to get warmer lately. Spring has had it's time, summer is making itself known. The walk doesn’t take long but what I see when I get there shocks me. Simon is curled up in one of the corners and I can see blood. I rush in ignoring everyone else as they try to stop me. I snatch the keys from the guy closest to the gate and open it as quick as I can.

“Simon what have you done.” He raises his head and I see that it’s not what he has done at all. He has a cut in his lip and above his eye. A bruises have starting to form on his face and one side of his face is starting to swell. 

“I’m sorry Lucy. I didn’t know they would attack this soon. They seemed to think I did, I swear I didn’t. I was kept out of the loop as soon as you left.” He nods his head towards the men standing in the doorway. I stand in front of Simon with my back to him. I pull at the gate and close it, tucking the only keys for this cell in my pocket.

“Fetch me warm water and a first aid kit. Rosita would be nice too.” I watch as they all finch at the sound of my voice. It’s full of disappointment and disgust. It’s no where close to the voice I used when I was in charge at the sanctuary , but it’s almost there. Two of them leave and one stay behind to keep watch.

I watch him as he paces the floor, following every move he makes. I recognise him as one of the people that was brought in not long after me. The way he would stand too close to people creeped me out, putting his hands on complete strangers, ones he had only just met, like they were old friends. He tried that shit with me, thinking I could be his little bit on the side, fucking disgusting man.

I back up to sit on the camp bed, never take my eyes off him. He attacked an innocent man just cause of who he associated himself with, what would happen when they all find out who I really was, what I have done and what I’m still capable of doing, hell what I want to do to him. Make him feel the pain he has caused Simon, acting as judge jury and if they hadn’t of been caught, I bet even executioner. 

It doesn’t take long for the others to return, they all watch me wary but waiting for me to open the gate. As if I’m going to let any of them in after what had just happened, they’ve got another thing coming. 

“Lucy, can you let me in so I can deal with the cuts. They look like they need stitches.” Rosita talks calmly to me. I can understand that . Since I closed the gate all I have done is watch them all, I can feel the anger in me. I probably look like a mad woman right now. I push my hair away from my face and calm down a bit, I doubt be doing either of us any favours if I don’t. 

“No. Your here to talk me through it not to do it yourself.” I don’t mean the venom that I say it with but a man is injured for someone else’s acts. “Pass the things through and tell me what to do first.” I stand in front of the gate waiting for her to decide. She is studying my face trying to see what I’m thinking. The frown on her face doesn’t cover the fear she has in her eyes. Maybe she’s truly seeing that I’m my brother, just worse. Finally believing everything I have been telling them. If she is seeing this I may need to calm down more, I don’t like that person, I’m not her anymore. 

She passes the things through to me. “You’ll need to clean all of the wounds so I can see how bad they really are. Once that is done I will need him the stand and come over so I can feel if there are any broken ribs. They told me what they did.” She shakes her head to the others and I can’t help the growl that comes from my throat when I look at them. 

“Leave. Now.” They all look at me, I grab Rosita wrist before she can turn away. I watch them go before looking at her. I loosen my grip before I speak, finally calm now they are gone from the room. She looks confused at my sudden change.

“I don’t what them anywhere near him again. He will be staying in my house from now on, coming with me until I can assure his safety.” Rosita looks at me and nods her head. I know the first thing she will do is go to Rick and tell him everything that has happened as soon as he’s back. There is an ache in my heart as soon as I think of this, what if they make me leave, could I really do that, leave them all behind and live out there by myself again. But I would be by myself would I, Daryl wouldn’t leave me, but he also wouldn’t leave them.

“You can’t do that Miss Lucy. The others don’t think I'm safe to be around them.” He stands beside me pulling on my shoulder to make me turn. “I want to go back to where I buried my wife. I should never of left her, that was always my place. By her side.” I remember him crying in the cell night after night about a woman but I never realised it was his wife, never cared enough to ask. I can see the look of sadness in his eyes, along with a loneliness I never noticed before. I sit him back down and start to clean him up, he winces as I clean his eye. 

“You will rest up first. I won’t allow you to go out on your own while you can't see out of one side of your face. Stay with me for a few days and I’ll take you back myself.” He reaches for my hand and holds it in his. 

“No Lucy. I will go today. I won’t be safe here anymore. They don’t trust me, and they shouldn’t. I know things about what Negan has planned just as you do. It down to you to stop him. They trust you, use that against him, show him your happiness. Show him what I have seen and heard while I have been here. Family isn’t always about blood.” I can feel the tension running off of Rosita behind me. She doesn’t say anything but I know she’s just waiting until she can get me out of the cell. I’m a little worried about what she will do, what will she take from what he has said. 

 

I finish cleaning Simon’s face to see that it’s not as bad as I thought. Stitches are not needed and I seal some of the bigger the cuts with glue just in case. He lifts his top so I can feel his ribs, nothing is broken just tender and bruised. 

“Rosita would you be able to find a few supplies for Simon and I will take him out.” 

“So your just going to let him go even though he said he has information.” 

“Yes that’s exactly what I’m going to do. No-one knows my brother like I do.” She scowl's at me before stomping out of the door. 

“Miss Lucy. This will be goodbye. We won’t see each other again.” He’s head hangs as I open the gates for us. 

“I’m going to head back home. Set back up in my old house and wait for whatever may come.” I can feel the tension in my shoulders. To let him go would be to kill him, but making him stay would be doing the same. I can’t take control of him anymore, he’s made his decision, it’s not mine to make. I unlock the gate and walk with him to the cars. We climb in one of the spare ones with enough petrol as Rosita passes me a backpack. 

“If Daryl gets back before you, I’ll let him know why your not here. Can you mark on the map where your heading so if you don’t make it back we know where to look. Please.” I take the map and hand it to Simon so he can circle the area. It’s a long drive, I’d forgotten I had found him way out there. It’s a good 80 miles away. She touches my shoulder and I turn back to her. “Please come back, believe it or not I do want you back here, not just for Daryl’s sake, not just to take Negan down. You are family now and we need you here.” I can feel the back of my eyes prick with tears. Everything she has ever said to me has been met with a fierce protectiveness, am I seeing the side of her that the rest of her ‘family’ see. I place my hand over hers.

“Just give me a day. If I’m not back by then something went wrong. Thank you Rosita.” She takes the map and hands it to the guard on duty before telling them to open the gates. 

 

 

The drive was long but uneventful. We stay silent for most of it because Simon sleeps. As I concentrate on the road I can feel the lack of sleep over coming me. The only reason I can stay awake is the quite music playing through the speakers. When we get there I shake Simon to wake him, he stretches and looks around, a tiny smile forming on his lips. 

“I have dreamed of this place for 2 years wishing I could come back. Thank you for letting me Lucy.” I reciprocate his smile but I can’t say anything. This man was my only constant for such a long time. Always there when I needed, managed to say all of the right things. Maybe I never changed him, I just made him afraid of me. 

“I’m sorry Simon. I should never of done those things to you. You were what I needed all along and I never noticed.” He turns towards me and grabs the bag from the back seat. 

“Its nice to hear but I would of followed you anywhere Lucy. Done anything you had asked me to, I stayed in that cell and did everything you asked because I wanted you, if we are being honest here. I have loved you for along time Lucille but I can see where your heart lies. I just hope he’s good enough for you. Even if you decide he’s not the right one, the rest are and love you for who you are. Remember that you have a family now, they will be there for you, even when you don’t want them to be.” I frown at him as he get out and starts to walk away. He loved me, but I belittled him, made him into a shell of a man to do my bidding. Also what does he mean about the others, ever since they found out who I am and what I have kept from them they have pushed me away, or at lest that’s what it has felt like. Only a few of them have stated the same.

I turn the car around as I watch Simon’s retreating form. I will miss him, he would of been handy, another person to stand beside me knowing what James is capable of, hell even just another person to stop me going to far. He knows I would kill everyone just to keep my family safe, now knowing these thing now that is how I feel about them. More of a family than I ever had. In my heart it says that James is a part of that for me, he was there for me during all of my darker moments, but he is a threat to the family I have created for myself, one that has excepted me for the fuck up I am. 

A small smile creeps up on my face as I think back to last night. Daryl is the reason I’m so welcomed, the reason I'm still there after they all found out who I was. I put my foot down with thoughts of getting home, I just remembered why we aren’t together, hilltop was attacked. My thoughts run through all of the people I care about and hope as hard as I can that nothing has happened to them. 

 

 

I come to a crossroads. The left goes to Alexandria, straight for hilltop. I close my eyes and rest my head on the steering wheel. What I need is sleep, but will it come if I don’t go see for myself, or will it just bring on new nightmares that keep me awake. 

 

‘Maggie, Jesus, Enid, all of their face flash up behind my eyelids. Covered in blood, staring at me with cloudy dead eyes, flesh already falling from their bones. Reaching, finders covered in fresh blood, for me while snarling my name.   
‘Lucy this is your fault!’  
Over and over again, never changing, I try to run but I just don’t get far. Maggie grabs me and leans in for my shoulder pulling at my skin with her teeth, I try to scream but nothing comes out. I can hear a distant banging but it’s nothing compared to the pain I feel in my arm.   
“Lucy wake up!” I recognise that voice. I look around to see where it’s coming from. Maggie pulls away from me and stumbles off with the others.   
“Lucy!” the ground feels like it’s moving under me and the banging is deafening. I never grew up Virginia, do we even get earthquakes here. The ground shakes more violently but I’m still looking for where the voice came from. I feel a sharp pain in my arm and scream out.’

 

I snap my eyes open a swing for the person next to me, my fist collides with their jaw, they turn away and rub at where I have hit before turning back. 

“Fuckin hell Luc. I was only tryin ta help.” As my brain awakes up I can see that my hands are cover in blood. I frown down at them, I never got out of the car, how can I have blood on me. I move my arms and wince at a sharp sting in my shoulder. I pull my top aside and see a stab wound. I look up at Daryl and see the knife in his hands. 

“DID YOU STAB ME JUST WAKE ME UP!” I try to get out but a pair of arms stop me. I turn my head to see who it is but Daryl pulls my head to face him. 

“No ya crazy bitch, I pulled it out cause ya were bleedin too much, also i knew it would wake ya up if I did. Don’t accuse me of doin somethin ya did ta yerself. Why’d ya do it?” I can see the tension in his eyes but his staying calm, he’s trying to keep calm. 

“Could of just woken me up nicely instead of pulling it out you know arsehole. I can think of a few nicer ways to wake up.” I see the corners of his mouth twitch up quickly before frowning at me. The arms holding me down relax. “Who the fuck is behind me anyway.” 

“Who else do you think is stupid enough to get in a car your behind the wheel of.” I smile sweetly before I reach back with my good arm and pull their hair so I can look at them. Jesus doesn’t fight me, when I catch sight of him I feel myself relax a bit. He’s alive, thank fuck. 

“You never complained before, why start now.” I loosen my grip and let him move away. Daryl is shifting beside me and as I look at him I see he’s worried about my arm. He has his rag in his hand putting pressure on the area to stop the bleeding. 

“Why were ya out here Luc. Why did ya stab yerself.” He doesn’t look at me just concentrates on my arm rubbing his jaw. 

“Bad dream.” I shrug at him but yelp when it causes me pain. I hear a muffled giggle in the back before the door opens. Jesus puts his arm on Daryl shoulder and I watch as he tries to slink away from the touch. I let out a protective growl, they both turn and look at me confused. I turn my head away from them trying to figure out why I just did that. 

“I’ll drive her back. Well get it out of her there when she’s got some pills in her. She won’t tell us much right now. Pain makes her a bit manic.” I shoot a venomous look to Jesus, it’s not that bad.

“Hey don’t talk about me while I’m sat right here. Basterd I could still take you on even if I only had one arm.” My head swims a bit and I can feel an arm pushing me back. My head hits the rest with a soft thud. Ok maybe it hurts a bit more than I thought.

“How about we get ya back and checked out before ya make more injuries.” Daryl frowns up at me and all I can do is grab his hand and squeeze. I don’t have any fight left in me. He helps me out and lays me across the back seats. I don't let him go, wrapping my legs around his waist pulling his hips down on to mine, using all the strength I have to keep him with me. I lift my head to his ear. 

“Ever had car sex.” I run my teeth along his earlobe and bite down a bit. I can feel the blush creeping up his neck and his growing member that is pressing up against me in just the right place. I lift my hips up and hear the quiet moan escape both of our throats. I jump at the sound of someone clearing their throat. 

“Luc as much as I would love to right now ya need ta get ya shoulder seen to, that and I don’ want anyone seeing ya as I make ya come undone.” He smiles down at me as he tries to detangle himself form my arms and legs. I pout up at him. 

“No fair. Anyway he’ll be watching you anyway. Isn’t that right Jesus.” I look over and see he’s face turn beetroot red. I laugh and it’s the last thing Daryl needed to be able to get away. I watch the two pass each other and laugh louder when Jesus keeps two feet between them. He climbs in behind the drivers seat. 

“Why did you say that for. I don’t tell you these things for you to blurt them out.” I sit up behind his seat and wrap my good arm around his chest. I watch him drive for awhile before I speak up. 

“Jesus. I love you no matter who you are, maybe you should love yourself more, hmm.” He puts an hand on mine as we travel in silence. 

 

 

I see the gates and shiver at the site of Rick. Pulling up he opens my door for me and helps me out. 

“What happened while I was gone.” I don’t like the way his tone is with me. “Simon is gone, I was told you took him away and let him go. We needed him.” I round up on him. 

“No you don’t and he wouldn’t of lasted long with all these fuckers beating on him. You have me I know all of them a lot better than you think. Don’t make the mistake James obviously fucking has. Use me don’t lock me out, or you just might end up losing.” He doesn’t back down but I can see his eyes soften a bit. I can feel my legs shaking with the stain of standing. I must of lost a lot more blood than I thought I had. 

I walk of towards home and I hear Rick speak to Daryl. 

“What happened to your face brother. We left you, you were fine. Don’t want your misses to think I got you hurt. Don’t want to be on the wrong end of her temper.” I can hear a chuckle come from Jesus and Daryl. 

“Na, she did it. Bitch to wake up she is.” I hear them all laugh. Fuck all of them, it’s not that hard to wake me up, plus I ask questions first not use my anger. I can hear footsteps following me as I head up the steps to home. 

 

I go to the kitchen and pull out the first aid kit from under the sink. I pull my top off, trying not to hurt myself more than i already have, taking one of the pain pills before I start to clean myself up. It’s not that bad, had worse. I sort out the needle and thread and make to stitch it up myself when a hand stops me. I look up the arm and see Daryl shaking his head, he takes it off me and helps me sit on the counter. I watch his face as he pushes the needle through the skin and ties little knots across the wound. I hold his arm and the counter top to steady myself. Yes it hurts but I wont let him think he’s hurting me. 

 

When he finishes and has packed everything away he faces me. Even helps me put on one of his shirts. I can see in his eyes he wants to ask me why I did it again, why I was out there alone, I don’t think he knows I told him the truth the first time. A thought pop’s into my head and I run with it. I pull his arms closer and rest my head on his shoulder, I feel him mould to my body as if they were always meant to fit together.

“You know I wasn’t kidding about the car sex.” I hear him chuckle and I smile. “I needed to get Simon away from here and it really was just a bad dream. Things like that used to happen all the time but I never had a weapon with me. I’d wake up with scratches and bruises all the time. It wasn’t until I woke up in the kitchen that I sorted out some help.” I can feel him stiffen around me. “ I used to see Denise about it. She taught me a few things that helped, didn’t think things had gotten that bad again.”  
“Now knowing I’m crazy too do you still mean what you said last night?” he pulls away a bit and studies my face. 

“No more crazy than the rest of us.” He reaches down into his pocket and pulls out a box. I can feel my heart thumping. “Found these awhile back, before ya even asked me the first time.” I frown at him. He knew I asked him and he’s only just mentioning it now. He shakes his head and I let him continue. “ I had been thinkin for awhile about how to go about it, not even knowin if ya was feelin the same. It weren’ till ya said it I knew how ya really felt. I can’t give ya much but I hope ya like these.” He passes me the box and steps back a bit. 

I open the box and see two rings one for each of us. One of them is a simple platinum band with two lines that run around the edge of the ring. The other is beautiful. A green square cut sapphire surrounded with little clear diamonds. The band itself is small and plain. It is the most beautiful ring I have ever seen. 

He plays with the ends of my hair while looking at my face. I slide the ring out that is meant to be his without him seeing, snapping it shut i pass him back the box. He looks a bit rejected until I take his left hand. 

“I vow to love you with my whole heart until death do us part.” I can’t keep the shake from my voice. I slide the ring on his finger and look down at his hand watching as it glistens under the lights. It’s simple but it doesn’t look out of place, like it belongs there, finally mine. After getting the other ring he takes my hand and rests it on my finger.

“I vow to love and protect ya until my dyin’ breath.” He slides the ring on my finger and pulls me towards him. He rests his forehead on mine and sighs. Pull his head up until our lips meet. 

“About fucking time. He’s been carrying those around with him for weeks.” I jump at the sudden activity behind me. Rick comes round as I jump down. He pulls me in for a quick hug before I’m pulled away from Maggie. 

“Did you really think that you could sneak away and get married without us knowing.” She takes my hand pulling me towards her so she can give me a big hug. “Shame on you.” I flinch as she squeezes my shoulder but she only loosens her hold on me. 

“What happened at hilltop?” I whisper in her ear. No-one had told me anything yet. It’s usually the only thing we talk about now. 

“No this is a happy moment and we are all going to enjoy it.” She shakes her head, everyone heard her so they all know what I asked. She changes the subject back to me. “We followed you in here when Rick saw Daryl playing with the box in his pocket. He ran around grabbing us all telling he had something for us to see. Good job Daryl forgot to close the door or you would of known we where there.” She pulls away and smiles down at me.

I’m passed around and given congratulations and hugs. The night goes on, most of them talking about past relationships and thing we have to look forward to. I can’t keep my eyes open. It’s been a long day, you could of spread the things that happened today over 4 days easily. My head keeps falling off Daryl shoulder and I jump awake, he just pulls me closer every time it happens. It’s after probably the 5th time this happens that someone other than Daryl notices.

“We should go, give the newlyweds time together.” Rick passes and wiggled his eyebrows at us, I try to shove him with my foot but miss. 

“Looks like sleeping beauty needs her sleep.” Jesus kisses the top of my head before he leaves.   
After they all go Daryl picks me up and carry’s me up the stairs. I rest my head on his shoulder and sigh with contentment. 

“You carrying me over the threshold Daryl. I never took you for someone that traditional.” He places me on the bed before helping me take my clothes off. 

“Well to be honest I didn’t think of that, I just didn’ want ya to hurt yerself climbin the stairs. Ya look beat.” I pull him down on top of me lifting my hips so they push into his. 

“I still have a little energy left.” He smirks down at me and stands again to remove his clothes before helping me pull mine off.

 

If I had thought that he was gently with me before I was proven wrong. We spent out first night together as husband and wife curled up in each other. Forgetting everything that could and will happen and just lost ourselves to what we were feeling in that moment. 

 

That night I didn’t have nightmares as I was wrapped around the man I love, dreaming of a future with no death and little blonde kids with brilliant blue eyes running around after their dad.


	25. Chapter 25

Weeks passed by were nothing happened. Everyone was on edge just waiting for another attack. I kept myself away from most of them, not wanting to be around them. They would only keep bugging me as to what James is planning, and for the first time I don’t know. This is so unlike him, I know he watching, I’ve seen a few of his guards around. He had agreed to the deal hadn’t he, the one that would make sure there was something worth fighting for, but yet he still attacked hilltop.

 

I’m packing a van ready to go out, I need something to do, I’m getting restless. Daryl comes up beside me and throws a bag in the back of the van startling me.

 

“Are we jumpy again my love.” He smirks down at me. He knows I need to go out and is refusing to let me go with anyone else. I didn’t fight him on it cause I want him with me. I have packed up the van with the things to trade with the kingdom, I plan to hunt on the way back, if only just to stay out longer.

 

“No just stuck in my head a bit, I want to get to the kingdom and then just get lost for a bit.” I avoided his concerned gaze and made sure we had everything we needed. The three communities were now trading their various good with each other fairly rather than handing half of what they had to the saviours.

 

I raised my head to look at the clouds in the sky wondering how my brother was now managing to feed the hundreds of mouths at the sanctuary, let alone most of the out posts as well. It wouldn’t be long before he attacked again and everyone is on edge just waiting for the inevitable.

 

 I feel Daryl hand snake around my waist and pulling me towards his chest. His head lowers to my ear and plants a kiss just behind it. I smile and place one of my hands in his. I continue to look up thinking back on a time, twelve years before the world went to shit, when you could sit in a park on a blanket and make shapes in the clouds above.

 

 

 

“ _Now that one is a duck for sure!”_

_“What one?” he moves closer to me and points at a cloud that looks nothing like a duck._

_“seriously that is not a duck that’s the one I said that looked like a basket.” He pokes my ribs as I start laughing at him. “think you need your eyes tested old man.” I roll over and reach for my drink only for it to be snatched away before I could grab it._

_“say it’s a duck and you can have it back.”_

_“no. Now give me back my drink.”_

_“want it that bad come get it.” I stand up, placing a hand on my hip and look at probably my most favourite person on the planet with a scowl on my face._

_“for an old man you sure are childish.”_

_“ahh come on Lucy, I’m only as old as the woman I’m touching.” I bend down and throw a cherry tomato at him. He catches it easily and throws it up in the air and it falls into his open mouth._

_“you really are gross sometimes, I do wonder if you really are my brother.” Snatching the bottle back from him while he distracted and sit back down. “I think you were adopted or mum and dad made a mistake and brought home the wrong kid.”_

_“such harsh words from someone who was shipped off to live with auntie.” I punch him in the arm as he settles himself back down next to me._

_“low blow arsehole.” I can’t help the smile that comes to my face as he rubs his arm looking all hurt._

_“Can’t believe you just hit me. What happened to the little girl in the flowery dresses that would bug me and make me to stop all of that work I had for collage.” He ruffles my hair which makes me slap his hand and push him away from me._

_“She grew up and realised that you were a pain in the arse.” He rights himself and puts am arm around my shoulders, pulling me close, and kisses the top of my head._

_“I’ve missed ya Lucille.”_

_“I missed you too James.”_

 

 

 

 

Such a simple time when he was still my brother. Before I had met my husband, before well everything really. I feel a tear run down my cheek and quickly wipe it away, there is no point in reliving the past, too much has happened and we are no longer those people.

 

“what ya thinkin' about?” Daryl's hand squeezes mine, pulling me from my thoughts and the clouds above.

 

“just about him and how so much has changed.” I turn around and curl my arms around his waist smelling his scent, calming me and making me feel safe. “he’s planning something, and I don’t know what. I have a feeling he’s waiting for us to attack first but I’m not sure.”

 

“Ricks planning something and if we do it right then we could win this, no doubt. He wants to go over it with ya but doesn’t know how to approach ya right now.” I feel as if someone has stabbed me in the gut.

 

“is that why no-one is around when I am then.” Daryl tilts my head up to look at me. I can see sadness in his eyes.

 

“they don’t know what yer thinkin, I don’t either. Ya so distant. I know ya want yer space and are hurting but we all need ya.” I pull him down for a kiss that only lasts a second before turning back to the car.

 

“come on, we need to go now or we'll lose the light.” I jump in the drivers side and start the car just as he sits himself beside me.

 

Pulling up to the gate Tara passes me a letter before she opens the gate. I look down at it before passing it to Daryl. Stopping at Tara I spoke the first words to her that I have done in weeks.

 

“we'll be back tomorrow evening. Anything you want us to look for?” she looks down at me shocked for a second before shaking her head.

 

“we just want you back. Both of you.” She smiles down at me and I can’t help but return the gesture.

 

Had I really been that distant with them. Acting exactly how Simon said I would, push everyone away until there wasn’t anyone left. The only one who hasn’t let me drift too far has been Daryl, and I wouldn’t of pushed him away anyway. I am now bound to him for the rest of my life and I wouldn't have it any other way.

 

“so what’s the plan?” the question pulls me from my thoughts but only briefly and I scan the woods for anyone there.

 

“Well we are heading to the kingdom first, leave the truck there and head out to hunt before heading back for the night. Load up tomorrow, more hunting and then home I guess.” I stop as I spot someone behind a tree, reaching for my hand gun I get out and move over to them. I watch as they start to panic and bend down on one knee, raising my gun I shoot above his head and the dead one falls to the ground. I stop a few yards away from him and stare at him.

 

“thank you Miss Negan.” He bows his head again staring at my feet.

 

“What do you know of his plans?” I’m coming up with a plan, slowly thinking it through as this guy stares back up at me.

 

“Miss Negan please don’t ask this of me. I would have nowhere to go.” I bend down to his level and I hear a growl from behind me. I raise my hand behind me to signal that I was ok. I didn’t know Daryl had followed me out until the boy in front of me scampered back a bit.

 

“I won’t let any harm come your way sweet boy, all you have to do is tell me the things I want to know and I will take you somewhere safe.” I hold my hand out to him and I watch as he considers what I’m saying.

 

I’m slightly scaring myself with how easy it is becoming to turn back to how I was, manipulating with my words, bending people’s wills to get what I want. The boy takes my hand and stands, helping me up as well. There is a small smile on his face but he still looks weary, taking quick glances over my shoulder.

 

“Miss Negan what would you like to know.” I pull him towards the truck and pass Daryl my gun as I pass. Opening the back door of the truck I motion for him to get in. Closing the door I feel a hand on my shoulder, turning me around.

 

“What ya thinkin’. We can’t take him with us. What if he don’t know anythin', or it’s a trick.” With each sentence Daryl’s hand tightens on my shoulder. I pull it off and bring it to my lips, placing a kiss on each knuckle.

 

“I need to know. James has always been an open book to me and I need to know if that attack was planned before or after the deal for one. If it was after then I will have more questions but I will also get answers.” I look down at our hands and twist the band on his finger. “Daryl help me remember who I really am if I need you to.” Whispering so quietly he had to lean down to hear me. Before he could speak I opened the door and climbing in after the boy who was going to tell me everything I need to know.

 

After a minute or two Daryl sits in the drivers seat getting us to the kingdom. I watch as the trees begin to thin and the building rise in their place. I lean forward and point to a street just around the back of the petrol station. I need to be alone with this boy, we can’t take him into the kingdom or he’ll be shot on sight. We pull up to a house in the middle of the street and I climb out grabbing the hand of the boy as I do.

 

“Two hours, it’s all I need.” I say to Daryl through the window placing a kiss on his cheek. Raising my hand to try and smooth out the frown lines he now has on his face. “I will be fine I promise.”

 

He drives off after watching me enter the house and closing the door my heart pangs from the distance between us already.

 

“So you never told me your name my sweet.” He lowers his head and stares at his feet, kicking the dust up from the floor.

 

“David. Names David Jones Miss.” Steering him more into the house I see just what I wanted in the kitchen, just where I left it.

 

“And how much about me do you know?” I feel him shudder under my touch as I talk. Good he knows just enough that this should be easy and I don’t have to go to far.

 

“I hear stories. Everyone is talking about you at the moment miss. Dwight told me not to fight against you if ever you wanted something and there is a punishment in place if any of us lay a hand on you.” The last bit pulls me up short, great full that David was facing away from me.

 

“Do you know where we are David.” He flinches at his name and as I push him down to sit in the chair in front of me. “We are in my favourite place at the moment. It has such a lovely feel about it doesn’t it. All of the clean white tiles.” He looks around as if only just noticing where he is. My hand brushes against his cheek and he looks back at me with fear in his eyes. Just what I wanted, a small smile appears on my face.

 

“Miss please. I’ll tell you anything you want.” He starts shaking under my hand and I can feel the sweat starting to pour from his face. Taking his weapons I check them and drop them on the only clear table in the room.

 

“Remember what I said, I won’t let any harm come your way as long as you tell me everything I want to know. Do that and then I will take you to the safest place I know.” He nods his head slowly and I watch him as he takes deep breaths to calm himself. “ your being such a good boy for mummy. Now do you know about the meeting I had with Negan and what was discussed?”

 

“Yes Miss I do. It was about a peace so we could survive.”

 

“Yes it was but then only a few hours later one of the communities was attacked. Tell my why is that?” he stares at my feet refusing to look up. “Now now this isn’t what I want, on my birthday and everything. Answer mummy or I may have to do something you won’t like sweetie.” His breathing gets quicker and he begins shaking again. I frown down at him. Maybe he doesn’t know anything, but I didn’t get to where I am by believing pathetic little boys and their lies. I reach down and force his head back so he had to look at me.

 

“He said..... he said that we needed to test you, see if you were being truthful and really wanted peace. I thought that meant just watching and being prepared. The attack was already planned but we never expected him to go through with it after the meeting. I was put on watch duty that night. I had nothing to do with it Miss Negan. Please.” He whispered back at me. Searching his eyes I see he’s more pathetic than I originally though, can’t even be bothered to lie to me, not even a little.

 

“Good boy. Get this next one right and we can get you to this safe place, okay?.” He gives me a small nod as an answer. “is he expecting retaliation?”

 

“Yes Miss Negan, he is. He’s preparing all of the outposts for attack, pulling in all of the commons from there and sending more saviour’s in their place.” He smiles up at me as if he has answered all of my questions. He closes his eyes and smiles as if all is right in the world, as if he will be rewarded. “He wants you home Miss. He’s doing everything he can to get you back. He needs you back.”

 

“No.” I whisper shaking my head and taking steps back until my back hits the table. Resting my hands on it I feel all of my old precious tools. Grasping one without him seeing I look up and smile. “So the sanctuary is unguarded right now. With only Negan and his precious few?”

 

“Yes, exactly. He’s even clearing space on the top floor for you. All of his wives have been put to work and your room as been cleaned and made ready for you. He’s even talking about letting you bring in a few of your closest friends. Most of us aren’t happy about that but we want you back too Miss.” David finally looks at me and flinches as he see that I an holding an axe just an arms length away from his neck.

 

“Thank you my sweet. It’s now time to go to that save place now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long. No excuses just life taking over.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed any comments would be greatly appreciated. I will try and get chapters out as soon as I can but sometimes life gets in the way. Till next time!


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